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I have been mistaken for a woman many times due to my long hair. I confess that I like being feminine. Is this common? Should we worry about this as guys with long hair? I do not mind being thought of as feminine, but it is interesting to me that men with long hair are automatically viewed as feminine. What do you think?
You should take it as a compliment. What's wrong with looking or feeling feminine? It probably just means that you have great hair? Do you go out of your way to wear it in "feminine" styles? If so, which ones?
I don't think that long hair on men automatically look feminine (if I look at the wrestling shows in TV). It depends from the individual person. For me the reasons to have long hair have a feminíne foundation, so I don't worry about looking feminine (currently I think I don't look so, sometimes in my past I did), but I don't have problems with my gender.
Hi Sandy.............please don't worry about looking fem....I think it's absolutely wonderful!I would very much like to talk to like-minded guys who, like me and you,love the feminine side of us, particularly in the hair department. Why not drop me a line-I'de love to talk more about our common thoughts....thanks ...Chris
(Sorry, I like the nick too much - grin)
Can you elaborate? I've often been mistake for a woman as well, but usually by people approaching me from the back (all they see is the long hair, so they automatically think they're walking up to a woman).
BTW: The pic above is slightly more recent than the first one I posted a few days ago. I'm posting this one because, 1) It was taken with a 35mm camera, so the quality is much better, and 2) It gives a much better idea of what my hair looks like, and about how short it may be once I get rid of the split ends that are currently annoying the hell out of me. I've got at least two inches worth that need to be done away with asap).
Well, not necessarily. Hair is a poor predictor of one's sex, but since more women than men have long hair, in the absence of other information, people are then apt to make that determination, yes.
As a recent thread seemed to indicate, this particularly happens if your hair is below mid-back, because few men, as compared to women, go for hair beyond that length.
On the other hand, if other information is present and observed - a beard, deep voice, a large typically-male frame, or very masculine body movements and mannerisms, the weak presumption from the hair vanishes in a flash.
I have shoulderblade-length hair, a beard, a deep voice, a large frame, and a very masculine demeanor. I have never been mistaken as female or taken as feminine. I'd suspect there are some longhairs in your local Harley club who would report the same. :-)
I too have a look thats basically masculine, but with this in mind
I like to add the feminine look also. I look around and feel
most female hairstyles and wish I could try out most of them.
To date have only tried a variety of pig tails, braids, and such.
I also like to wear what would normally be considered feminine
earrings. Dangly, big hoops, multiple earrings in each ear.
Again, its just a mix with my basic masculine look.
Wish it was more exceptable. Wish I could find a women who would
appreciate these things.
Sandy, I suspect it is more common than we realize! I've worn my hair long and feminine since way before the Internet, a time when I did not know what the heck I 'was'. It is great that this medium serves to let you know that you are not alone. And me.
I am heterosexual (although I know gay and lesbian people and have no problems with THEIR situation). Yet I am not only attracted to female long hair but long hair on males (although I feel no sexual attraction to THEM -- just turned on by the hair). And, I like my hair long and feminine, to the extent I can get away with it.
I also have no desire to change my sex--I enjoy what I am. Further, I have no desire to pass as female (but again, given my own condition I understand the spectrum of sexuality and respect it all).
I guess I enjoy appearing feminine, particularly my hair, and having people realize that I want to look that way. You're gonna get weird looks, of course, but that is part of the enjoyment.
Like some of the others that have posted replies, I also enjoy a few, particular, other feminine aspects. My ears are double pierced and I enjoy earring--particularly large hoops (by the way, such are back in fashion again. You can now find 3-inch hoops at those stores [Claires here in NC] in the malls). I've played with makeup but it is not a real turn on. I used to pluck my eyebrows but have not in quite some time.
It's mostly my hair, which I have worn approximately waist length for many years. Somehow, I am not really interested in braids or curls--long, straight and shiny is my thing. I've mostly worn it all one length but have played with styles some, since it really gives people a message that you like to look 'pretty', if not feminine. One of my favorite 'cuts' was to have feathered-back bangs cut (popular in the 70s and 80s and still seen today). So, it was to my waist on the back and sides, but with long bangs layerec back, ending at the back of my ears and at the lobes. Whe I first had the bangs cut by a stylist, and looked in her mirror at the result, I looked like a real babe! A bit of styling makes a difference. I wore it that way for several years, frequently taken as female from front or back, and I loved it.
I then grew out some of the bangs and cut the front bangs straight across, when girls started wearing bangs again a few years ago. I have now let my bangs grow out again.
I think style adds to the femininity. When I first grew my hair out, in college, I kept it for a while in a long, angled bob. I could tuck it behind my ears (the default in the beginning of longer guys hair, anyway), and let it loose for a pretty look. It was short--collar length--in the back and tapered longer, an inch or two longer than chin length, in the front. No bangs. It was sexier than hell, at least to me and an understanding girlfriend who would play with it. When I wore that freshly shampooed, blow-dried smooth with a bit of curl-under it was a great look. Very femme. Coupled with large hoops just visible as arcs of gold at the bottom of the bob, I was *ususally* mistaken for a girl. It taught me what a bit of styling will do for you. At that time it also separated me from the rag-tag hippie look that was more common (and let US get away with OUR desires!) I now have a couple of *nice* bob wigs that I wear out occasionally, for a change.
So, all of the others are right: enjoy yourself. You and I and the rest of us have been dealt a slightly different deck in life and we need to play the cards we have.
I would be very interested in seeing other replies on this topic. I know that many of the regulars are more 'regular' in sexuality, but I suspect many more like to look pretty, at least as far as the hair. C'mon and let us hear!
That sort of thing is not unusual. That's one reason so many of the longhair sites call themselves "gay and bi" longhairs - there are a lot of guys like you. My partner runs a bulletin board for people into boots that is similar to this one for longhairs, and there have been some discussion threads there from straight men about how they feel about men when they're wearing boots. And we've seen similar comments here regarding long hair. The comments of all these men were very affirming of your situation.
I will add that for some people answering those threads, they were attracted to the person of their own sex if they had the attribute of interest, instead of being attracted just to it.
I am totally with you! I do happen to be gay and have always wanted to go to a salon and be treated like a woman. I've always wanted a feminine haircut - a shag or a bob or wedge - and i've wanted my hair frosted and my ears pierced. I've never lived in an area that would accept that - so I think I should move from here so I can be myself. So to you rfem haircut - go for it and love it1 I bet you're gorgeous - e-mail me with your feelings...take care Jim.....
I'm gay, I have hair to my waist, and I also wear several earrings in each ear. I have no problem being mistaken for female, though since I have a beard it rarely happens! I enjoy having my hair done and wearing things that are semi-feminine.
I do get a lot of interest from straight guys who are totally turned on by my long hair. Not that they're sexually attracted to me, just that they're (I think) envious and intrigued by the length and fullness. A couple have "crossed over," but only with me, and I think if I'd cut my hair the interest would have ended. Nothing weird about that--we all have gay/bi/straight sides to our personalities.
I guess what I'm saying is--if people think you're feminine, enjoy it, revel in it, and have fun with it! Women are terrific people too.
I am a guy with my hair cut in a bob below my ears with bangs and stacked some in the back. I have also been mistaken for a girl which I take as a compliment because it means that they think that I have pretty hair and because I love girls and girly things too. I have to wash, condition, and blow my hair each morning. I like to also use barrette and hairbands to change things up some. I like makeup and I have my eyebrows done at the salon when I get my hair trimmed. The bob styles are probably more associated with femininity than most other cuts for some reason and I love my bob because of the movement and versatility. There is nothing wrong with a guy dabbling in femininity in my opinion. Women have the whole spectrum to play with where most guys opt to stick with the stereotypical mold which allows very little variety and style. Myself, I like to expand my horizons and my hair, clothing, and makeup options. Let's do it.