new thread
Thank you to all who responded to my previous post with regards to responding respectfully.
I hear very often the idea of "well, cut it when you're ready". I hear this from people all the time, as if I am preparing or "getting ready" to cut my hair. I'm curious what you guys all think of this?
Thanks again,
Brad
They seem to associate, in my humble opinion, that your long hair constitues a drawback from a stage of evolution in your life - as in you'd be holding back and that once you're "ready", you'd cut your hair and "finally conform". Frankly I wouldn't give it much thought unless YOU want it shorter. You make the call, no one else does, and their bit of psychology means nothing if you don't acknowledge of it and give them reason.
Really, just do it your way and don't ever think that having your hair however you like is selfish, it is not, it's YOUR hair.
Sara
On the first day of summer in Y2K, I impulsively cut my waist-length hair off, because I mistakenly thought I was "ready"...
Once it fully hit me what I'd done, it took a looooooooong time for me to recover from feeling totally devatated. The good news is that it woke me up to the fact that I realized I had to become COMMITTED to long hair for life, in order not to make that mistake ever again.
I've known of some guys who grow their hair out as more or less of a "phase" they want to experience. Three of my brothers did that, then eventually cut their hair short. They seem happy either way (occasionally one or the other will get a little "shaggy", then go short again). But the nice thing is that my brothers & mom all recognize that I'm a little different on that account... They KNOW i was totally miserable after I cut my hair off, and they were fully supportive of me growing it back (how could they NOT be, when it was obvious I was miserable as a short-hair?).
One can never predict the future; but chances are that the folks that claim you'll cut your hair when you're "ready" either don't know you well enough on the inside; or, DO know you in *most* ways, but don't understand how being a longhair can be something important to one's sense of their identity. Probably THEY grew their hair out at some point in their life (even if only a little bit); but cut it around the age or time in their life when they felt they were "growing up" or "growing past that phase", or whatever... But YOU are not THEM. Only *you* can make the decision about what length of hair works for you, --- what feels comfortable, what feels "right", what makes YOU happy (not them)!
- Ken in San Francisco
Hi Brad,
if you are a true long-hair, then you will be ready for a haircut "when hell freezes over" (Compliments to Axel for this one), or, "when the Pacific Ocean runs dry", or "when the Sahara desert runs out of sand".
Just remember: Parallel lines get ready to intersect each other at an infinitely great distance from here, so, for your own wellbeing, don't consider a haircut before you're ready to go to that point ;-)
Happy growth!
Hans-Uwe
Everwho says this is in the frame of mind that short hair would be the default setting for a male, while actually long is the default which is reached in the absence of outside interference by means of scissors and clippers. It is hard for one to shift their frame of reference if this has been inculcated his/her whole life. It is possible, but with very great difficulty that a paradigm is broken down, but usually this person can not be pushed into that frame of mind and must arrive at it on his own. The way to which this point is arrived varies for each one. You however have not the time to worry on bringing others to your viewpoint, pointless that is. By the very act of you growing your hair, you work to alleviate angst that one may have against hirsuteness by being the best you can be, by having well taken care of hair, and by extending the courtesy that you desire to be given to those who may not actually deserve your courtesy. In time, your nay-sayers should come to the realization that you will indeed never be ready to cut your beautiful hair.
Good luck. Bragi
My boyfriend (several years ago) grew his hair long (to his waist) for me because i asked him to leave it alone for a while. He then decided he really loved it (all by himself, the length was always his final decision) And he had the same problems you have right now, people making comments.
I had a mate who used to always go on about his hair to him, every time we were out, every time we were in, every time she saw us. 'when are you cutting your hair' or 'why dont you cut your hair' or 'arent ylou ready to cut that yet?' I shut her up one day. I turned around and said 'are you trying to ruin my sex life???' LOL Take from that what you will but she shut up el pronto. And never another word was spoken to my bf about his hair.
Ignore the idiots because thats what they are. We all like different things, we are all individuals and we all have a right to be ourselves. Perhaps the best thing to do is either say something outragous (as i did) or pick on something they like and give them back the banter, just see how they like it. I am sure they will soon shut up.
Hi Asdis,
thanks for your comments, you're great! Congratulations to your boyfriend for having a girlfriend like you, and too bad you're already taken ;-) lol
This also serves as a message for all long-haired guys looking for a girlfriend - there are great girls out there who love and take you just the way you are!
Best wishes to your boyfriend and to you, may his hair grow on forever!
Hans-Uwe
Thanks! (Now i'm blushing)
feel free to use my quote to anyone out there LOL
