new thread
I'm physically a long haired male, in Tracy, CA, USA. It's a culturally dead place full of big box stores and bedroom communities. I recently applied to a local supermarket for a job and got a brief interview. They said they wouldn't hire me though, unless I cut my hair short, and that girls aren't held to the same standard. I'm feeling really upset about it, and really don't want to make the last 2 years of growing my hair go to waste... I've grown a lot more attached to it than I'd expected.
The full story (1038 words) is here on my journal:
http://synx.dyndns.org/journal/journal221.shtml
Anyone with advice I'd really appreciate it... currently I'm going to try to politely postpone their offer while I sort all this out, and try to find other places of employment who won't make me cut my hair so drastically. The prospects aren't good though for a not-yet-college-graduator in Asphaltville...
Hi Pandora,
If they don't show their company policy, and if some other male employees get away with long hair, then they probably want to turn you off so they don't have to hire you - or even worse, it's a dishonest company - and dishonest companies typically make their employees very unhappy. This is a serious warning sign! Don't even waste your time arguing with them - look elsewhere.
Something I noticed: Your writing style shows me that your skills to express yourself, your intelligence, and your astute observational skills (and your degree of honesty!) are a lot higher than average - they might have sensed that, and by now they are so scared of you, they wouldn't want to hire you, not even with short hair. Or, if they did, they'd fire you over a technicality in a few weeks, and you'd be doubly unhappy.
I'd consider moving to another place if you have to (assuming you're at least 18). If you are living at your parents' place, just check how much more money you'd have AFTER subtracting the rent (or, perhaps, the costs for a car), and compare that with how much you could make at home WITHOUT having to pay rent or to buy a car.
You can also apply for jobs eg at the local library, or local schools (like filing away documents, but perhaps they even let you do some substitute teaching?), or perhaps any other institution or government agency (eg IRS, assuming you are a US citizen) - or you could perhaps offer remedial tutoring for elementary / middle / high school students in any subject you are good at - just a few ideas. You'll know much better what would apply to your situation, and what would not.
I'm afraid that cutting your hair would NOT improve your job prospects in your home town, but moving elsewhere probably would help you to get employment withOUT a haircut, of course (while feeling good about yourself).
Wishing you lots of luck,
Hans-Uwe
My advice? Don't cut it. Not for a minimum wage supermarket job. Not for any job. You are who you are and your hair is a part of you. If they don't like it, then they can look for someone else to hire.
It's a double standard to accept long hair on females, but to reject it on males. Why is it that we never hear stories of short haired women being discriminated against? If it's considered acceptable practice for a woman to wear her hair long, then why is it also acceptable that she wear it short when, for men, it is only acceptable that they wear their hair short? Don't get me wrong. I'm not saying I have a problem with short haired women. I'm only pointing out how warped so many people's ideas of acceptable hair length are.
If I owned a supermarket, my only dress code would be that you wear clothes that fit you and that your pants begin at your waist where they belong and not in the middle of your butt. Maybe that's discrimination too though. As for hair length, I would leave that up to the individual.
My girlfriend has short hair and she got made fun of horrible because of it, but yes, your statement is generally true.
OK, I just read what you wrote in your journal. From the tone of your words, you do not need to work at this place. Even if you did, the resentment that you ALREADY feel towards these managers would not bode well for your keeping this job for very long. And if you do cut your hair, you sound like you would be so angry that you would hate the job. Basically, sounds like to me if you take this job, it would be like a subliminal punishment or something. I certainly would not agree to be bound by any document that I did not know the contents of. Actually, I am not a fan of being bound by much of anything.
I can sympathize with your feelings of being told that you had to cut your hair to work there. That is wrong.
Remember, in an interview, that you should be interviewing them as much as they are you. They have failed the interview from your perspective, not you. The fact that they were so adamant about hair cutting and 'wild eyed' and shifting their words as you stated really says to me that this supermarket is not where you want to be!
You went to the library to research the policy? What about a job there? That would probably be much more relaxed and enjoyable anyway than a grocery store.
A music store, a book store, a Walmart, a Home Depot, these are places I have seen long haired fellows working. There are many others places I'm sure.
If there is not room at the job for all of you as you are(with the hair), there is not room for any of you, in my opinion. As you said, making concessions just sets up the precedent for more concessions to be asked for in the future. Just do your best and present yourself well at the next interview you go to, and you should be fine. Choose carefully the job you take. If you are about to graduate from college soon, choose even more carefully.
Good Luck!
Very well spoken Bragi. I couldn't agree more. There are plenty of good jobs out there to consider for yourself Pandora. Leave Save Mart far behind and look elsewhere.
Okay, I just read your full article. How about reporting Save Mart to the Better Business Bureau? You can file a complaint through the website...
http://www.bbb.org/
These people sound to me like they're just begging for a lawsuit to be filed against them.
Thanks so much everyone. I have asked at my library, but they can't even make room for the number of volunteers who want to work there! Finding nice employment is definitely a tricky business, and I think you're right in the judgement that even though I got an interview there, the job probably wouldn't work out. If only I was about to graduate from college soon! Frustrating not having that Bachelor's degree so many people require of programmers. There are other options though, as you have told me so well. I'm feeling good enough now, maybe I will walk right up to one of those schools and ask if they could use a well schooled janitor, or something.
Maybe you should move to the northeast... In my opinion, we have the highest living standard in the whole country. I actually worked at 2 different grocery stores in Vermont (one of them being a corporate supermarket... yuck), and I never had any problems with my hair or my piercings. The only thing I can recall is when I was growing my hair out, my boss at the small grocery store would always tell me to cut it... but I didn't, and eventually he just let it go. You'll be dealing with this kind of stuff as a longhair... you just gotta see past it.
-Ardroth
Yes, I know where Tracy is. I drove through there on my way to Stockton at the beginning of this month. Probably the best thing to do is to see where longhaired guys *can* work in your town. Bookstores, music stores, computer stores tend to be more enlightened. When I worked driving a shuttle bus, I wore a turban--and had no problem, since there are other drivers who drive cabs and trucks who wear turbans. But when I tried to find work as a front-desk administrative assistant, I got turned down place after place. No one wanted a turban-wearing guy "representing the business" after 9/11. So then I went job hunting without the turban--and everyone seeing the long hair thought I was a musician or hippie. Ultimately I found a job as an admin at an e-commerce business that sells computer parts. So if you have any longhaired friends in Tracy, ask them where they work--and that ought to give you some idea where you should look, too.
I think you should look for a different place to apply. Another supermarket perhaps.
I work in a supermarket with longhair, but that's in Denmark. But I have seen clerks in supermarkets in the US and the UK with long hair as well.
"I did find a legal summary of a court case in which the upper management of Save Mart required their employees to seek redress of grievances from 'team leaders' instead of the employee's union, then got caught instructing said team leaders not to redress any grievances."
Welcome Pandora. Given your journal's report I'd say you are better off never having been hired by that place both from your research and your own experience. If you are still in college there are often many campus employment opportunities or assistance finding jobs off site.
I'm curious, with your opening "I'm physically a long haired male" rather than just stating you are a long haired male, choice of the name Pandora here, and the store manager referring to "your type" are you perhaps transgendered? If so that might help your case depending on the local laws. While being discriminated against for hair length is not readily protected, gender identity and expression may get more support.
You might want to look into that if it applies to you. Since we're talking employment the Gender Public Advocacy Coalition's site (linked below) which has a list of major corporations, some surely found in Tracy, that agree to show respect to their workers and provide an open-minded workplace.
I wish you well, Pandora. Remember that your Ancient Greek namesake found hope at the bottom of the box she opened, my wish is for you to find the same.
Elizabeth
Pandora,
i live in Tucson Az. and work at a local grocery store. They do not allow long hair on men here either, but I wear a wig that is short and pin/tuck my hair up under it. They dont like it but I am in dress code. I recently cut 14 inches off my hair to donate it to locks-of-love, (for personal reasons) but I am in the process of growing it back. To my knowledge this subject, has been taken to the supreme court and they decided that if a competitor has the "buisiness cut" rule then other companys could do the same, maybe it's about time for us to take a stand. What do you think?
I work at a grocery store in Idaho...I have had long hair for over 5 years now...and I had it when I got the job. In the companies policy it states that men's hair is not to cover the ears or extend beyon the shirt collar. When it is trimmed to it's usual length (just above shoulders) and I pull it into a pony tail (which I would do at work whether required to or not) it follows both of these rules. However, my managers force me to wear a hat and are constantly threatening to fire me if I do not tuck my hair up under it. Tucking my hair under my hat is extremely uncomfortable, and i must admit quite damaging to my ego as well... I'm not a person to be ashamed of myself and so it's almost ironic that I actually become ashamed because I give off the appearance to people who see me that I am ashamed. The women at my store may wear their hair however they please...a hat if they like, or none if that's what butters their toast. I am convinced that this is some form of discrimination but have been unable to find anything to back up my claim. I just found this site today and am very glad to now have a support group to help me maintain the courage that I have upheld through the years against my employers (and my mom :D ) Before anybody replies I feel I should make you aware of a few more facts:
I do not work around any open foods such as produce or meats, therefore any fallen hair (which I don't get) would not be a health issue
I can not just quit this job on principal as I have bills to pay and my insurance (which is very good) is through the company
I work the graveyard shift stocking shelves so it's not like many customers see me (the store is open 24 hours) and in the mornings when people do start pouring in I have never had anybody say anything about my hair.
That about sums it up, if anybody knows about a discrimination law or something to that affect I would appreciate hearing about it...
Pandora as for you, if you don't like the place don't start working there, that's always the safest bet, but I agree with everybody else, I will never cut my hair for any reason other than me wanting to do it, no girl or job could ever convince me to. Good luck!
ZaC