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if there were any other young guys here whose parents are either supportive or indifferent about their decision to grow their hair. My parents have been nothing but supportive. My mom, whose hair is butt length, says that she can't wait to see my hair at midback or longer. The really surprising thing, is that my dad, who is the conservative type, has never said anything negative about me growing my hair. The acceptance in my parents could be in part due to the fact that they were teenagers in the 70's. Come to think of it, my dad actually did sport longish hair for a while.
Mom - slightly supportive
Dad - mostly neutral
my mom every now and then tells me I should get a haircut, I dont know why she even bothers
my dad at one point said that if he still had hair, he'd have it the same way.
My dad jokes about my hair getting long. My mom, however, kept suggesting that I get it cut and offered to cut it herself. However, they haven't bothered me about it lately.
my mom is the most anti-longhair (on guys) person ive ever met. but maybe thats because i usually dont have long conversations with random people who come up to me and tell me to cut my hair :P.
my dad doesnt mind at all that my hair is long, and he was in the marines for 20 years.
Mum = Neutral
Dad = Neutral
It's my grandma who is the problem, and she influences my Dad, but hey he's only ever said two things to me so it's not bad at all. I think grandma has all but given up now anyway.
My Mum offered to cut my hair (and she meant trim, not remove all of) but i declined (i've seen her hair when she's cut it herself), i think if i want a trim i'll wait till i go to uni cause a noticed a hair salon on campus with "Long Hair Specialists" in big letters around the door ^_^
There was a couple of years when I wanted to grow out my hair, but my parents wouldn't let me. I dreaded going to the hair salon every other week.
Now that my hair is long, both of my parents are supportive.
my mom was very supportive of me having my hair long. She was way ahead of her time, though. Her manner of thinking was like that of people today. She was an artist, believed in freedom of expression, and was a free thinker. She was not one to follow the crowd. Those who can't think for themselves and follow the crowd, I refer to as "sheeple".
I tried growing it out, and got it to about 8 inches in length. Not being able to deal with the awkward stage, I caved and cut it. If there was a support group, like the hyperboard, available back then, I might have succeeded in growing it long on the first try.
I tried on a few occasions as an adult to grow my hair long. Finally in 1992, I was sick of my short hair and rat tail, and just let it grow. No trims, I just let the rat tail slowly disappear amongst the rest of my hair, and the rest is history.
Absalom
Sounds like you had a very cool mom!
But, where are these thinking people today!?!
;-)
Bragi
She was a real visionary, and yes, she was cool. She did not even mind if I smoked pot occasionally. I realize now that she allowed this to keep me away from alcohol. It worked, I never tried to get drunk during my teen years, despite my friends doing so.
This is tough to answer. Try hippie hangouts. Longhairs are almost always free thinkers. Perhaps a rainbow gathering. Maybe seek out some artists or musicians, but not mainstream ones. Try the more unusual ones. Street performers are usually very cool. That is all I can think of at this time. Maybe someone else here can add some ideas.
Absalom
I was 16 in '69 also. My dad had just retired from the military, and still ran a strict household. Also, the coaches then didn't allow long hair on athletes. To play ball, we all had to have military type haircuts.
Since you are this age, you remember having to register for the draft, and having your number assigned. They were still taking draftees for Vietnam. I was number 38. So it wasn't until after two years of ROTC (deferment) that I experienced letting my hair grow.
Big George
My lottery number was 195, if I remember correctly. Even if my number was much lower, I would have been rejected due to health problems. Blinding migraines alone were enough to disqualify me. Throw in asperger's, prosopagnosia, (face blindness) and central auditory processing disorder, and there was no way they could use me, even if I was the last man standing.
Absalom
I dont think my dad will ever approve of my long hair but he seems indifferent I guess it was because I am grown up. However if I were like 16 years old I probably would never grow past 3 inches...
my parents both like my hair long, they say it suits my personailty more. funny thing about it is my dad is a 1st sargeant in the U.S. army and has been in for 24 years and he's really supportive of my hair long, pretty ironic because i have friends with military dads and they're pretty much dictative jerks who demand how they dress and look.
my mom is a novel writer so she's really open minded and accepts whatever choice i make.
in a few months i'm getting my first tattoo (16th b-day present) so yea i have great supportive parents
Ha, my dad's a military dad as well. The only thing he's concerned with is me getting a job, which I've done, so he's off my back.
Aside from my parents sometimes suggesting trims, I'd say they are pretty neutral. They don't have a problem with me growing my hair out. I kinda expected it though, seeing as they let me paint my nails and have them long.
Very supportave. In fact, believe it or not, hahaha....it was my mother who approached me two months or so ago and said, "your hair is just too short, you need to grow it out again." My father is just the same way. When he was younger, he had long hair, he pierced his own ear, listened to metal....etc., etc., so he's very tolerant and open minded. As long as I continue to do well in school and stay drug and alcohol free, which I have no problem with, my parents have no disputes, and are in fact very supportive of all that I do and say including my hair.
My Mom is really encouraging for me growing my hair out. My dad likes it too. He says he's jealous, He's mostly bald but no problem for me since my Mom's dad had a full head of hair til the day he died. Even my grandpa supports me. kinda cool. so yeah, I can't really understand people who get picked on because of their hair because it's never happened to me. I guess im lucky :)
My mom inexplicably thinks that if my hair gets much longer it will make people mistake me for a girl (I'm 6'4", 210 lbs, by the way) but overall she's pretty nuetral about it.
My dad (who has longer-than-average hair himself) really likes it.
The problem is that they think that college admissions and financial aid folks will have a lower opinion of me because of it, and I honestly think they might have a point. All spring, some of my teachers kept telling me that I should get a haircut so I wouldn't look like such a slacker. Considering that these are people who know that I'm a straight-A student and I work about thirty hours a week, I don't have a very good feeling about what assumption educators who don't know me might make, consciously or subconsciously. With thousands of dollars a year in scholarships at stake, I really don't want to take any risks. If it isn't long enough to look extremely neat by about the end of this year, I may end up cutting it before all the interviews and such. But if I do I'll immediately start growing it long again.
If you are a straight-A student and have work references, and you didn't mention it, but probably extra-curricular activities, these things will speak for themselves.
If a college admission or financial aid person cannot see past their own pre-conceived ideas about what a student they want at their school to look like, then that is certainly a short-coming on their part. I would be surprised if any of your worries ever came to fruition in your acceptance into college.
I will say too that some high school teachers LOVE to scare students into thinking college is some place to be nervous about, to scare them into thinking it is sooooo hard, and in general create undue anxiety about something that you are really going to enjoy. The teachers might have a point if you are trying to get into the Citadel or West Point or something, but a state or even a private (non-religious affiliation)school should not have problems with you in regards to hair length, as I am sure you will find that the students at the school come in all shapes and sizes.
It was always my experience anyway that I never even met with a school administrator before I was accepted anyhow. All the SAT scores were submitted to the school through the testing service, and high school transcripts were sent from the school itself. Financial aid applications and scholarship applications were sent and processed with me sight unseen as well. Now this was several years ago the first time, but just this summer, I did all the application and sundry activity online, and was accepted and fully 'processed', all with me sight-unseen for some college work I am about to do. Both were reputable schools, so some of your fears may be unfounded.
Bragi
Oh, being accepted into college will be no problem at all. But the college that is my number-one choice will be too expensive unless I can get alot of scholarship money. At this particular school, they have all the students who have been accepted and want scholarships spend a weekend at the college going through an interview process. It's very, very competitive as almost everyone who even goes to this school is extremely smart. I need to be in the top 20% or so to get enough scholarship money to be able to afford it, so it's absolutely critical that I make the best impression possible.
I absolutely agree that if any of the financial aid officers are prejudiced against me because of my hair, that the problem is their bigotry and not my hair, but I would be the one who would suffer for it, not them. I would certainly hope it wouldn't be a problem, but considering that the interviewers will most likely be people who lived through the hippie era, they may subconciously relate long hair with rebellious behavior and laziness without even realizing it (no offense to any hippies of course, but those seem to be the most common negative stereotypes of longhairs), and in a process this competitive, with this much at stake, even something that minor could be enough to put this school out of my financial reach. If it's long enough by then (next January) to tie it all back and have it look nice and neat, which I think it should be, then I definitely won't get it cut. But if it's still in the unkempt skater/wannabe punk rocker looking phase, then I may have to make a tough decision.
Hi again,
I think if your #1 college is really top quality, they will understand that they'll have to give out scholarships generously if they want poor straight-A students like you to actually enroll. Face it, for a lot of male college students, growing your hair out is the thing to do, and the scholarship people know it - they can't be that blind. And, they want their college to look great, so, they most definitely won't fuss over your hair. That's true for local state colleges AND for Ivy Leage / Little Ivy League schools, too.
Long hair may even be a plus when it comes to scholarships for people like you! If it fits the situation, talk about Jonathan Schwartz, the Sun Microsystems CEO, and they'll happily give you the scholarship, thinking about the huge donation you'll make to them once you are a (long-haired, of course) CEO yourself. Think big and long!
Hans-Uwe
Unless you are applying to a very small, conservative, private college with strict standards, I would think that your hair length would not factor into the equation.
Most college admins see such a broad spectrum of applicants that they are pretty immune to long haired male students. They are looking for students who will succeed. You have the grades which are a part of it, you work, and evidently have the extra curricular activities to demonstrate being a well rounded person. I don't think that your hair would be a problem.
Dress appropriately for the interviews, tie your hair back, present yourself as interested and actively seeking to attend that school, and good luck.
Big George
I'm 34, so whether my Dad approves is irrelevant to me, and Mom died 5 years ago, but if I were a parent, my kid would likely have long hair by 2nd grade.
hehehe
SOA,
You Mom sounds cool. I had issues early on my Mom and my sisters. One of my sisters gave me the most crap about it. However, I talked to my Mom and told her that her comments hurt me as I just want to be myself. She understood and now does not bother me about it at all. I think word may have trickled up stream to my sisters as they do not bother me about it either. My Mom is even liking it now as it has gotten longer. My Dad who is very conservative has strangly never bothered me about it. He did tease me a few when I grew the beard in 2001. However, I am in my mid 20s so I think that my have some to do with it.
ESDI