new thread
Hi, thank you to most of you for your posative comments, im sorry if i offend some of you but thats the way i am, im not gay but i do dress as a girl most of the time, i came on here because i like chatting about hair, and i like guys that have long hair that make the most of it, i like it when guys wear nice hair accesories, i know alot of you think its to feminine but hey you've got to be who you want to be, im a hairdresser, and yes, i do go to work dressed as a girl and people just treat me the same as all the other girls in the salon, im not on here to get of with guys just share my delights and pictures, of making the most of long hair, i hope this makes some sence and sorts some issues out that some have with me, keep the hair flowing guys, love Nisha.
Nisha,
I generally find that this is a pretty awesome group of guys, representing a wide range of views, experiences and ages. Given that diversity, I think that they generally respond positively to most people who come here.
I have to tell you that I felt like you set yourself and others who read your posts up for conflict. It was not immediately clear from your first posts (back to us) that you were a man. You never came right out and told us so (unless I missed a post in which you did that).
You have just now told us that you are not gay, and that you go to work dressed as a "girl". You appear to be an adult and not a child, so I guess "woman" would be more correct. I assume that you are trans-gendered.
It would help if you told the commmunity you want to participate in these kinds of things--at least that's my opinion. Will that make some people uncomfortable? You already know the answer to that if you are living as a man who dresses like a girl. But, not more uncomfortable than those who disocver that the girl they have been talking to is a man.
Robert
I know I'm new here, but I have absolutely no issues with you, Nisha. I'm here for the hair. And yours looks healthy from what I can tell. Nice length, too. It goes with the look you've got going on there. So, good job! And if you are truly happy with yourself deep inside then that's all that matters...not the external ridiculing we all experience in life from time to time.
Be well,
~Gman
You didn't offend anyone because of the way you are, it's the way you began here. "Is this too feminine?" speaking of your hair while you're in women's clothes. That's the way you are comfortable, that's great, that's acceptible. But you seem abiguous about your hair style.
No, hair adornments aren't necessarily masculine/feminine. I will wear "mannish" hair accessories whenever I darned well feel like it. I will not ask anyone "does this make me look like a man?"...especially if I were wearing "man's" clothing. That's what I wear, I'm comfortable in it, I don't care what you think. Take me as I am.
It's your own self confidence that I find questionable in your posts.
You look absolutely lovely, I love your hair, your makeup looks great, and I love your taste in clothes! You, and everyone in your life knows you like to look feminine, don't question it!
This may sound like a rude post, but please don't take it as such. Be confident, don't question your style, and you'll be accepted. You seem to be looking for conflict where it isn't necessary. We are an open-minded people here who accept everyone for who they are.
Welcome to the board!
I remember the first time I met a drag queen when I first moved to San Francisco in '77. I was 24 y/o at the time, and fresh from a fairly sheltered suburban Chicago, IL conservative-religious upbringing. I went downtown to go out and get a hamburger at 2AM, accidentally sitting next to this middle-aged woman. At first I didn't mind her chatting and flirting with me; but as I gradually figured out that "she" was really a "he", I freaked-out, crammed the rest of my hamburger down my throat, and raced out the door, --- WITHOUT paying! The manager even had to chase after me to get his $$ (which I gladly paid for, once I realized and was embarrassed about what I'd done)...
Nowadays, I ain't the same naive little 24-year old from Illinois, --- and probably would even thank a drag queen like that for the flirting comments, and even strike up a lively conversation... Amazing how we grow & change as we mature & gain life-experience!
I'm gay, so I certainly have experienced plenty of rejection in my own life. But in the long run, I've found that if you like who you are on the INside, and are confident about who you are as a total person, then the exterior things that you present to the world no longer really matter. Best to focus on your internal qualities of character, and letting others get to know the real "you" underneath, first. If you are likeable as a human being, --- as a caring, ethical, responsible, etc. person, first --- then whatever someone learns about you as a big, dark, secret "surprise" about your physical/psychological or sexual self usually is of less imortance to loved ones, once discovered afterwards. I have friends, as well as family, who knew and liked me just as "Ken" for years before they ever found out I was gay. If they are TRUE friends, they will accept and still love you, no matter what...
If someone is still in-conflict within themselves, however, then this disturbance comes across, and can make others feel "ill at-ease" around the internally conflicted person. My experience, anyway...
- Ken