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Lately , My family has been telling me my hair looks terrible. I am actually starting to beleive it. I honestly think my hair looks like crap. :-(
I think its beautiful full of awesome waves, thick. I would love to have your hair. Just get the ends evened up and you will like it better
Paulie
Thanks Paulie!! trim? i dont think i will. i am wary when it comes to hairdressers.
i am wary when it comes to hairdressers.
hehe=)
you should be,they seem to always cut more then they are supposed to.
a.
Looks quite healthy to me!
Robert
Thanks Robert. Your mane is looking awesome as well. Hey , If i remember correctly , You have mastered various languages. One of them was italian. Would you like to learn spanish? European spanish i mean. I can help you if you are interested.
I see a nice head of naturally curly hair with lots of shine and no problems! And it can only get better with more length--DON'T cut it! Keep it growing!
David
Thanks for the compliments , David. I am definitely not going to cut it. BTW , your hair is looking great. when will you post some update pics?
Hi Chris, thanks so much for the compliments. I plan to post updates about mid January, 3 months after my avatar picture that was taken in October. I want to give myself 3 months so I can better evaluate my growth rate after my "change" in hair care routine which started in September. (I had been abusing my hair prior to that and had considerable damage from straigtening which caused my growth to come to a near standstill due to breakage, etc. In September, I discovered this board, wised up and started to treat my hair better.)
David
Looks very healthy to me. Your waves/curls look quite vibrant actually. A little bit of jojoba oil on the ends is always a good thing, maybe you could try that.
I think this is just a typical attempt by your family to try to exercise control over you. They are feeding you fallacies hoping to break your will to have the hair you want. Do not allow them to do this!
I think you and justin are absolutely correct. How disheartening comments cane be , Especially coming from family members
I don't see anything wrong with your hair either ;) .In fact my hair has the same wavyness yours has (I even thought before I started growing mine, that my hair was straight, but it seems I was wrong ^^). I say: don't worry about it, I actually think it's cool.
As for the "cut it!!" or "Your hair isn't looking good..." family/friends comments, it is something to be expected when you want to grow your hair out. The only thing to do, is not to care about it, don't let yourself be influenced by other people, because you might regret it.
Think of how cool your hair will look like in juste a few months ;), and hang on.
Keep it growing
Thanks. I suppose you are right.
If anyone is telling you that your hair looks bad with shiney full hair like yours, they are either off their medications or obviously follically challenged.
Your hair looks super !!
hahaha. Yea , thanks Dawn!
wow...hey brother..your hair has improved VASTLY since you last posted..seriously I'm NOT kidding...your waviness has increased!!it seems like the no cone method is working for you..keep it up...and LEAVE THE HAIR ALONE...your family is LYING to you( to try to convince you to cut it)
In the worst case scenario,you probably have a few split ends here and there (just like most longhairs).I wouldn't worry about that...just leave your hair alone I mean it!!
Hey man , Thanks for the encouragement. I really appreciate it. I think i am going to stick to the no-cone method. My hair seems to be gaining volume and curls.
hehe...I forgot to ask you...have you clarified your hair?I haven't done this yet (haven't gotten around to getting any claryfing shampoo yet), and I haven't seen much improvement in my hair, I guess it's because I haven't claryfied it.
Yea man , i clarified it. I bought Herbal essence degunkify tingly deep cleaning shampoo. Its cheap as heck and works. I didnt see any cones in it. all i saw was Methylchloroisothiazolinone , and Methylisothiazolinone. I read about this ingredient and it is used for anti bacterial purposes. Nonetheless , It might be a cone...................
Too bad your family has instilled this feeling in you, for it is hardly the case. You have a magnificent mane!
I rather think that the family has a bit of a problem.
Thanks Justin. I am going to ignore them. They probably just want me to cut it
Hey man...I honestly think you're on the right track. Your hair is thick, shiny and looks healthy to me, brother. I think it's safe to say that we all go through phases where we think our hair looks bad at some point. Believe me...I certainly have. I almost cut my hair twice since I decided to grow it long again because of the dreaded awkward phases. But, they pass and the longer your hair gets the more you're going to enjoy it. I promise. What you're going through with your family is a classic scenario for many aspiring longhairs. My parent-in-laws are so incredibly conservative that they just don't know what to think of me anymore. But, their problem with my hair, my beard, my outlook on life is just that...their problem, not mine. Once those negative forces realize that they can't change you then they tend to lay off. Consider what you're going through a test of strength and courage. Follow your heart and you can't go wrong.
Yea brother , Its good to know i am not alone. I actually thought about cutting it. Thanks for the encouragement man. Man , Thank god i found this board , Otherwise , I would have been sporting a buzz cut or perhaps a shaved head.
Actually, I think it's mostly the type of hair you have. Plus you're kind of in an awkward stage from the looks of it right now. They are probably commenting on the length of your hair more than the quality of it. It really does look good!
Good luck growing
*Shin*
Hey Shin , I never thanked you for recommending the VO5 shampoo/conditioner. I love it. It is affordable and highly effective. I think that the cheapest shampoos are the ones that provide the best results.
I think it looks good! It's shiny, wavy, and looks to be in good health. I'm going to have to agree with everyone else and say maybe your family is just critical of long hair, and trying to get you to cut it.
At the worst, it might look kind of frizzy or dry, but it's hard to tell. That's for you to judge. If it feels dry, put some jojoba oil on the ends (that stuff does wonders!).
Yea , It was a bit frizzy and a tad dry. I have my CON AIR brush to thank for the frizziness
It certainly doesn't look damaged to me. In fact, it looks very healthy and it looks great. The wave pattern is most attractive.
I agree with what others are saying. Your family is messing with you here. It appears they want to demoralize you so you can bow to their wishes. Have they been after you to cut it?
I smell a ploy!
It's tough hearing comments like that from one's family, --- especially if you're still living at home, and financially dependent on them. Hang in there! And in my opinion, those pics show a very healthy-looking head of hair to me (looks GREAT, in fact)!
When I was young, my dad absolutely would not allow long hair in his house, on me or my brothers. It wasn't until I left home to be on my own at age 18 that I finally got to grow it out to even a "long-ISH" stage! But, my guess is that your parents sound a little more reasonable; just are doing and saying whatever they can to hope you'll change your own mind, in order to see you cut it!
If the pressure gets too much, here's a suggestion that may help: consider getting a light trimming of the ends, and/or possibly re-shaping / re-styling. Let me make myself perfectly clear here: I am NOT saying *I* feel you "need" to do this, myself, --- I think your hair looks awesome, just the way it is! But, if the comments ever overwhelm you, and you feel tempted to cut it ALL off... DON'T!!! Instead, as a compromise under difficult circumstances, simply seek out a hair stylist of your OWN choosing (preferably one who specializes in long hair), and go in for just a light trimming of the ends.
Finding a good hair stylist that is good with long hair can be tricky. DON'T go to cheap chain shops (like "Supercuts", for example), I can't begin to tell you how many nightmare stories I have heard come out of places like that! Instead, ask around, especially anybody who you know with long hair whose hair you admire (whether male or female), and see if they recommend anyone in your area. But... be prepared to pay a much higher price for the better quality hair-stylists, --- but, they are WORTH it!!!
Getting a light trim may not entirely stop the negative comments from family or friends who are simply opposed to long hair, regardless; but it often shuts people up, because they realize you're interested in taking GOOD care of your hair, --- and that your focus is to grow it *long*. I got periodic trims myself when I was in the process of growing mine out (BOTH times... the first time was during the '90s; the 2nd, time was after a devastating haircut in Y2K). And each time I came to see the hair stylist, I emphasized my goal of GROWING, --- and that I only wanted the absolute minimum cut off (to make it more endurable during the "awkward stages").
Hope these comments help!
- Ken in San Francisco
Thanks Ken , My family is lenient but in a way they are not. its the daily comments that make me uneasy. They asked me what was the reason for me letting my hair grow long. I answered with honesty, I simply told them i wanted it long for one simple reason. I feel more like myself since i started growing it. I feel like i awoke or discovered my self. Its hard to explain.. I explained to them i wasn't growing it to rebel against them or society. I told them it wasn't a teenage phase either. I just feel comfortable with it period. Im just loving it. Sometimes , Comments can hurt people and that's what they don't understand. I have a gay uncle whom i get along with very well. They criticize and ridicule him daily. I always argue violently with them because of this. It is his life and his sexual preference. I mean , They haven't effaced him , but they hurt him daily. I just hate them sometimes for it. They don't realize that they are hurting him. Sorry ,This is completely off topic but i felt like sharing it with you. Hope you don't mind.
P.S I think i will trim after one more year of growth. I just want to wait till it gets a longer
You certainly shared a lot of insightful comments there, and I definitely agree on the points you made! I, too, have always not quite felt like "myself" whenever I've had short hair (which, when I was young, was all of my life until after age 18).
Interesting comments about your gay uncle. I happen to be gay also, --- as well as an uncle!! I have 3 nephews and 6 nieces. Luckily for me, all my family accepts and loves me for who I am. Whenever teasing occurs in my family, it's all in the spirit of fun, and if I'm the recipient of a joke, --- especially if it's about me being gay --- I usually have a come-back to throw at them as well!
As far as your parents are concerned... time, patience and maybe an expanding of their horizons (through more exposure to people "different" from themselves) may eventually soften and change their harsh critical thinking patterns. No "guarantee" this will happen, of course. Only THEY can make that choice to either stubbornly view the world through narrow-minded eyes, or reconsider having a fresher view and maybe even a change-of-heart, --- and learn to appreciate other people's natural differences, to accept and embrace, instead of constantly criticize.
Sounds like you think for yourself pretty clearly, --- especially under the difficult circumstances of living in a rather judgmental and critical environment! My only additional thought to share is: just love your family as much as you can show it to them (in spite of how challenging that may be at times)... and strive to be the very best example yourself of showing them the way out of cruel comments and critical thinking. In fact... I'd say, for the most part, that right now you sound like you behave more like an "adult" than THEY do! And if that is indeed the case, then you have my greatest admiration & repect!
Sincerely,
Ken in San Francisco
I think it looks great, and I've enjoyed watching your progress because you seem to have a similar hair type to mine (and I'm only about five months in).
As far as your family is concerned, remember that people are often afraid of someone who goes against the mainstream. Your choice to be a longhair screams, "I'm going to be who I really am, not simply conform to society." Every time they see you they are reminded (subconsciously) of how afraid THEY are to be their true selves.
You are rocking their world, challenging their preconceived notions about what a "man" is supposed to look like.
Thanks , You are nothing but correct! Its good to hear you enjoy my progress pics. Take care and good luck growing your hair!
a couple years ago when i started to grow my hair long my family told me that it would fall out if i had it to long,but i just let it grow and it havent fallen out yet.
keep growing.
a.
ps:your hair looks great!!
Thanks for the encouragement dude
None of the above. Your hair looks great!
Thanks Pat. It is extremely reassuring to hear this from a veteran(of long hair). Cool braid by the way
Hey. Your hair doesn't look dry/dull/damaged at all! It looks great, it has a nice color and texture. Keep it growing, it will only look better as time passes!
-Mihnea
Hey man, all I can say is that you're hair from my vantage point looks completely undamaged and in fantastic condition as I can't make out any sort of frizz or other damage and it has a really great shine and the colour is really cool too. Don't worry as you seem to worry too much and keep it growing there dude. Take care
I really don't think anything is wrong. Your hair looks quite healthy actually. Seems like it's just more in the awkward stage than anything, which may turn people off from it somewhat. Otherwise, lookin' good! =)
Hi
Christopher
Honest opinions can vary in very different ways but my opinion is based on my own theory only your hair certainly doesnt look like crap as you so put it its far from it, I feel I must put it that you have started to believe all that you hear from your family & friends as they have convinced you of that fact to believe it does in order for you to lose your awesome growing locks of hair.
It is time to realize that it must be down to your own judgement weither you keep your appearence you have now & keep growing it or get it cut off, dont be another victim by listening to all you hear as you may regret the circumstances of listening to them but be advised it takes a long time to grow back & easier to be cut off !!
DONT BE A VICTIM OF WHAT YOU HEAR
Axel
Hi Christopher,
I think your hair is pretty good looking actually. It's a shame that your family thinks what they think. I (and many others on this board) had the same problem with my family, however as time went on and my hair got longer (and a bit easier to control), my family started to accept the look and my mentality about my hair being here to stay, some of them are even starting to like it. Hopefully, the same will happen to you.
In the mean time, keep growing it because you have a great head of hair!
Neil
Looks good to me man. A couple of the pictures, it looks a little "dry," but not in a bad way at all - just looks like you just washed it or something. I know how things people say can sometimes get to you, and you can start to believe it. Hopefully all the positive comments from the ppl here will help fight against that.
Dave
I agree with all the others. Family and friends who's ideal of hair style is short will try to convince you that anything longer than buzz is ugly, too long or "doesn't suit you" Remember these are only opinions, not fact. The only fact that matters is whether you are happy!
Hang in there, it looks great!
Bruce