Well Im sure you all know the dreaded awkward phase while growing hair out. After a year and a month of growing from really short hair, I just feel like giving up. I feel so crushed in how deceived I was about how my hair would turn out. I thought my hair would be growing in beautiful straight locks, but its turned into this wavy, sometimes curly crap, and Im quite frankly not too thrilled. I never understood why this has happened, because I always had straight hair. I get very frustrated and feel the way my hair is does not enhance my appearance. Recently I have just felt like I dont deserve to have long hair because of how things have been going. Im sure a lot of you know what it feels like to want something so badly (like long hair), and yet it looks like you cant have it because what you get, doesnt live up to what you expect it to be.
I was lucky enough to have straight hair on very rare occasions becuase of the weather, and I realized it was the best look for me. When I see the back of my hair in this poofy, curly wavy crap, it once again really does discourage me. Perhaps Ill still be stuck the awkward phase for god knows how long. Ive also had problems with tangling, after showering and throughout the day.
The good news is that hair on the top of my head is more or less straight, its just the ends and the back of my head around the crown and below that have the kink/wave problem. Perhaps could anyone who has experienced this problem know if my hair will eventually straighten out as it grows more? To my understanding, as physics dictates, the weight of the lock as it grows longer will pull the hair down, thus making it straighter. Can anyone verify this?
Thanks everyone.
Although my hair is not "curly": it is indeed "wavey", --- and during my awkward stages (I've been through it twice), it most definitely looked totally WACKY. But, if you cut it now, you'll never know how it REALLY looks long, because the weight of longer hair does indeed help "straighten" it into a much beter look later on...
Give it at least another year, preferably even a year and a half, --- and THEN decide if it's not the mane of your dreams!!
- Ken in San Francisco
I agree with Ken, he should know haveing done it twice. I would add: don't go to bed with wet hair. It'll curl your hair like crazy!
Hang in there, it'll get better!
Bruce
Dont cut just yet. My hair did just about the same thing. Cutting your hair will leave you with the "what if's"......what if you had let your hair grow a little longer?.
I remember waking up one morning and i realized that my hair was straight. Not that hair gets straight overnight, but i just forgot about my hair and didnt pay it much attention, then once the weight was there, it straightened out.
Hair is a living thing, it will be different on every person . you can only be thanksful for what you have, some people want what we have but it is impossible for them to achieve having any hair at all.
If I were you, i would do my best to wait it out a nother year, you'll be amazed.
Maybe a picture would give us a better idea as to what you are working with.
Peace
clayton
I agree with what the others have said, DON'T GIVE UP! Although I too, would love to have stick straight hair (it grows faster and is easier to care for), wavy or curly hair can also look awesome as it gets longer, and shows more dedication as it does take more work to achieve long wavy/curly hair. Don't forget that as the hair grows longer, the added weight will tend to pull it straighter.
Also, remember that EVERYONE deserves to have long hair!
Hope this helps,
David
The exact same thing happened to me the first time I tried to let my hair grow. I was in the army for four years during which time long hair was fashionable, but of course I had to get mine cut because of the military. We GIs were envious of the Dutch because they could have long hair in their military. Anyway, I left the service and went to college. about a year before that, Ronald Reagan got elected president and somehow, seemingly overnight, the military and short hair were cool. this has pretty much not changed since then. So I became a civilian, looking forward to letting my hair grow and suddenly, I'm wondering what happened to society, and feeling kind of ripped off, but I went ahead with it anyway. I had no idea what I was doing, and it turned out in hindsight I was doing everything bad, that could be done--blow drying, bad shampoo, no conditioner, mauling my scalp with my fingers so my head looked like this sponge/ brillo pad/ feather duster thing. (Today for some reason, it's a lot straighter, probably due to age.) One guy with relatively long hair whom I knew told me eventually gravity would pull it down but I figured that would take years. I was probably right about that. I couldn't deal with it and after about a year decided I wasn't meant to have long hair, gave up and got it cut.
I sure wish I hadn't done that now, but there was no support, no internet to find find things out with, and I was too young to have self confidence--I wanted to fit in. the only message here is that if you stick with it, you will eventually be glad you did from my experience.
don't give up man. I too wasn't very pleased with my hair a few months ago.I really didn't like how thick it was, and was thinking of getting an undercut.Fortunately,I changed my mind,and I love how it looks now!!sometimes,instead of our hair changing,our attitudes change!!be patient!!give it another year at least!!
The Awkward Phase is a dreadful thing to go through...it's just awful.
It's a time of doubting your own judgment. And when you look in the mirror you think: "Am I insane for growing my hair long?"
Then you have to deal with family, friends, co-workers, etc. and most
of them are NOT supporting you AT ALL.
Sometimes the way your hair looks makes you feel so very isolated and alone...
...and for those of you with few friends...well, the awkward phase just makes everything WORSE!!!
The thing is, NOBODY can help you to decide what's RIGHT FOR YOU. Nobody!
You are the one who has to live with that awful mess on your head. "Who needs this?" you scream out silently to yourself (though you wish you could scream it out to the whole world!)
It's AWFUL...SHEER HELL...and you DON'T NEED THIS!
Hmmmmm...but maybe there is a part of you that is willing to suffer through this 'mess' to get to the 'other side'--to become a Longhaired Man!
But HOW do you decide? You certainly can't ask your family and friends because most of them will surely try to talk you out of growing your hair long.
So it's YOU and Mr. Mirror who must decide...and most of the time, even Mr. Mirror seems to hate the way you look!
You might even think: "Well, if I cut my hair then I won't be a part of this Hyperboard any more." Well, no, you could still post here, but then you might feel a bit 'out of place.'
Okay, so HOW can you tell if you really WANT long hair? Well, there is no fool-proof way, but if you feel--deep down inside--that you desire to have long hair; that it's RIGHT for you and that you WANT to look different and attract attention as a Longhaired Man, then maybe that is a clue for you that will help you to decide which road to take.
You will have MANY doubts ahead of you while on your Long Hair Journey...and you may have to do a lot of soul searching and none of that stuff will be easy...
Good Luck and take things one step at a time.
Hi Jens Cristian,
I'd say, hair does change its chjaracter over time, so, the way it looks now does not necessarily predict how it's going to look in, say, another year. I'd just stick it out, and I'd just wear it and feel good about it (it's part of you, and you're a really cool guy, and your hair is cool, too, no matter what it happens to be doing!)
Post some pictures and collect some feedback here if you feel comfortable doing so.
All the best, and merry Christmas!
Hans-Uwe