new thread
Hey guys, as the title shows you, I'm a new poster here. I'm stoked that there is a place for longhairs to gather and share their experiences etc. I've lurked here for quite some time, but finally decided to post.
I've got a bit of a story behind my longhair journey (as do we all), hopefully someone can take a lesson or two from it:
For most of my life, I always had longer hair than the other guys in my school(s). My parents are great and have encouraged me to grow my hair as long as I want, so I did. The thing was, at school I was often picked on and bullied because of my hair. Just being different in that way was enough to shape my social 'fate' as it were. This continued right through my highschool years, by which point my self-image was solidified with my long hair. Yet my self-esteem hit an all time low, and I started blaming my problems (not being able to get a girlfriend, get into the cool crowd; you know, highschool crap) on my hair. The inner conflict got to the point where I just caved.
So exactly 2 and a half years ago, I as a foolish 17 year old at the start of my last year of highschool, took an electric razor to my hair and shaved it all down to #2. Finally I thought I might be accepted as a new person by my peers. For a while it almost seemed so, but in the end it didn't happen.
You know that feeling you got as a kid after a bad haircut, looking in the mirror and taking a moment to recognise yourself? The emptiness and shame I felt each time was consuming - I sacrificed a large aspect of myself just for a crowd. I couldn't face trying to regrow my hair just yet, so I decided to keep my hair short until highschool was over. It was a long year, let me tell you.
But finally it ended, and I resolved never again to cut my hair for anyone else.
I'm now 19, and in that time since, I've matured tenfold. I am definitely a longhair at heart. I'm about 1 year into my regrowth; not a longhair yet, but on my way.
To any longhairs thinking about caving to the pressure from family/ friends/ peers/ oneself: take a real long, hard look at yourself before you make a decision. To cut your hair short is like self-mutilation, at least on a psychological level. It seems trivial to others, 'it's just hair' , so it is easy for them to mock you.
I've never told anyone that story...I appreciate the oppurtunity to tell it to kindred spirits.
Thanks for reading
And I hope you all have a safe and happy holiday season.
Indeed something I think many potential longhairs need to hear, including me. You are obviously a strong person, sharing this with us and growing your hair back. As you say, the real issue isn´t the way we look. The real problem is much deeper than that.
Good luck and happy holidays matey!
Many of us have feelings that agree with yours - hair is a part of the body and is apt to be missed like any other body part for us. However those who don't share that feeling may try to trivialize that feeling by saying, "It's only hair." Well, there is a great response to that: "Indeed, as you say, it's only hair, so GET OVER IT!"
Welcome!
Bill
Hi Chad F.
I am glad you shared your story, and I feel and have felt EXACTLY as you do. I could have just about written the last few lines of your story.
Thanks for posting, and good luck with your growing!
See you later, Bragi
Welcome!
Man, if my parents would've let me grow my hair before I left home (which I tried) your story might have been mine.
Are you going to college? Chosen well, you may find that college students can be markedly different and more open to differentness, as I did (not all of them, of course- some of those high-school shallow-tards always manage to get into higher education, I know not how).
-sectari
Hi Chad,
great that you are growing it back. You'll be yourself once more, and this time for good. If any "self esteem" or "self assertiveness" issues should come up ever again, you might even contact a college counselor (they also do some regular "coaching", even if it is NOT a "mental health" issue, properly speaking).
Wishing you all the best, good growth, and a good 2007,
Hans-Uwe