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Well, it was going to happen sooner or later, and I'm starting to draw fire from my employer over my hair length, which is just about at my shoulders. Any thots? I can see an "edict" coming down fairly soon.
Don,
Do you work for a small company?? If so, maybe a one-on-one chat telling him/her of the personal importance of your chosen hairstyle will help..
If not, tell them that multi-million dollar lawyers have hair to their WAIST!!
Good luck!!
R.
Hang in there! Harassment can increase proportionately with how much you look like a sheep attempting to wander from the short-haired flock. At some point of hair growth you will cease to look like a flock member, and the harassment will taper off. Your really long hair length will send a message that you are a committed longhair, not to be brought back into the fold of short-haired men.
I heard of a great example of this thought process in action, just last week. A longhair friend of mine works with two other men. The other day, their boss came in and said, "Guys, we have a vice president of the company coming in, so I expect to see haircuts," and as my friend was about to have a heart attack, he turned to my friend and said, "Of course, I don't mean you!"
This threshold takes about a year or two to cross. I'd stick with the current employer unless they begin to mistreat you, since the worst they can do is fire you, which is exactly where you'll be if you quit. If mistreatment or firing follows, you can go to work somewhere else. During the time your hair grows out you will find work somewhere, though it may be a little bit more of a challenge than it would be if you were short-haired. After your hair is long, although bigotry will still be out there, it will subside appreciably, and you will have more options again.
In the meantime, tell them matter of factly that "you are growing your hair out" and that "you have always kept your hair neat and though you will be having longer hair, your keeping your hair neat is a characteristic of yours that will not change."
DO NOT agree to compromises that involve cutting the hair in one style or another, such as "short in front". (BTDT) This not only sets the precedent that you will let them dictate your hair length, but eventually you will realize you want the hair style you wanted in the first place, and you will be facing an EVEN LONGER period of awkwardness as the trimmed portion of your hair grows through the awkward stage.
I'd steer away from legal action or threatening it. By then they will hate you. Even if you win and get to stay, who would want to spend all day with people who hate him? If going elsewhere is an option, it should always be considered first. A black co-worker and friend once told me he thought he was being racially harassed at our workplace, and I suggested he FIRST look for a job elsewhere. Two weeks later he came in grinning from ear to ear. He had found work at a much higher salary down the street!
If you are not heavily intertwined with the present company (pensions, etc.), you may be better off to leave anyway. Bosses tend to think of you like you were when you were hired, no matter how much you have changed in appearance or SKILLS. A new place, unlike the old, will not be forever thinking of you subconsciously as that short haired novice, TWO things you don't want in your boss's mind anyway. A new
place will see you as having always been a longhair, and they are less apt to harass you into becoming something you, in their eyes, never were.
Good luck!
A lot depends on the variables. Do you work a job in which you have regular contact with customers or clients. If so, and they order you to cut your hair, ask them how many people have complained about your hair, who they are, and if you can see a copy of any record of those complaints. In many cases, there have been ZERO complaints. I was once harassed about my hair at a precious job simply because we got a new regional VP who was an old fuddy-duddy and couldn't handle the long-hairs. Eventually, the company admitted that there had never been a single complaint from anyone about long hair on men -- except from this VP. (Didn't change the policy, but it made my point.)
If you work in a "behind the scenes" profession, then I would simply ask them if they have somehow made a direct relationship between your hair length and your job performance -- i.e., "have I been doing my job more poorly as my hair has grown longer? If not, then what on earth is the relevance of this?"
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The messages have been coming so fast the past couple of days (or I've been in a time warp) that I didn't even notice when we passed 2000. Congratulations to everyone who has posted!
I think you need to decide how important the job is to you first. You need to know where your limits must be. There is no legal challenge for this corporate policies regarding dress code. Sure, you can go to court (at great expense), but it is very unlikely you will win. The courts generally hold that it is the right of a company to decide and enforce the image it chooses to project to the public.
How do I know this? Well, I'm in a rather unusual position of having had very long hair in the past and having to get it cut in order to advance in my profession--the degree of discrimination against it was phenomenal. Most recently, I am in a high level managerial position and had been liberal with regard to dress code--except for a few complaints from customers which I addressed with the individuals who had been targeted. Then I had two employees who let their hair grow very long--they wore it in nicely groomed ponytails. Along came two others who were trainees in our company--still both of these were nicely groomed. Then I started getting customer complaints on a regular basis. Why? I have no idea. Customer were just not satisfied with the ponytailed appearance of our professional staff. One told me he would steer his entire corporate business to a competitor (a major loss to our company) if we continued to let men "looking like that" represent us. That's something no manager can ignore. I--the former "hippie"--had to develop a corporate policy for appearance that includes hair length (no longer than collar). Both trainees came in the following day with short (one a flattop!!) hair. One of the employees cut his hair and the other was dismissed. Unfortunate, but it was his choice.
As you might guess, a whole flock of attorneys were involved in the development of this policy (and its implementation).
So, Don, decide what's most important to you. If you can get a better job elsewhere (where your hair is tolerated), then do so. Otherwise, get the to a barber. Sorry!