new thread
Hey everyone,
Well I'm new here though I must come clean and admit that I've been lurking for the past few days and I am just astounded at how wonderful this site truly is. Lots of phenomenal people filled with stories of inspiration, tribulation, hopes, wants, and dreams. So I'm hoping that I may receive some words of wisdom from those who have been there; growing their hair and everything that comes with the territory.
I have been wanting to grow my hair long or longer ever since I saw Tom Cruise sporting that amazing mane of hair in MI2 seven years ago(I know, I'm probably gonna get some chuckles out of that, so go ahead:) Anyway, I tried once that same year, but had some bad luck. Since I was working at a pool at the time, my hair was always exposed to the elements: chlorine, Alabama heat and humidity, and rays of the sun. Perming it later that year didn't help either though(I'm certainly not providing pics because it was awful). Eventually I decided to buzz it all off and sported short hair for 5 1/2(it's the right thing to do when you're from conservative Alabama); that is until I spent the summer studying in California and naturally became liberated. I thus began growing it out and only had my hair cut once I found a reputable salon upon my return to the South. My stylist was doing a great job with my hair and I was enjoying the prospect of growing it long, but in February of this year had to cut a substantial amount off for a job interview. Seeing as I didn't get the job, my self-esteem plummeted since I had worked so hard to obtain the head of hair that I had just chopped off. After that I began growing it again with cuts about every six to seven weeks and now am certainly gonna be able to grow it out because I recently accepted a teaching position in South Korea and thus will not be limited to how long I can go(as long as it's somewhat kempt I imagine).
Anyway, now I will finally get to my question and I apologize if I've gone overboard with the post, but wanted to fill you in on my situation. My plan is to leave for Korea in mid-October and so far it has been seven weeks since my last cut. My main fear, seeing as my front doesn't grow too quickly and the back grows like wild fire, is ending up with mullet-esque look while I allow it to grow. So, would you recommend that I see my stylist before I leave, and if so, what would you suggest that I ask him to do? The other scenario, if you think that I'll be okay, is to just pass on the trim and just let it grow for awhile. I've posted some pictures, so that you can evaluate and as you'll see I have very fine hair, so lots of product is currently required for it to stay in place. Since my front isn't quite long enough yet, I've just been slicking it all back. Can't wait till I have enough for a small pony tail though cause I have a feeling it's going to look great from the way it looks when it's slicked back! The other picks show how it looks with no product just after a wash and once it's completely dry. As you can see, there is much more definition in the front when it's wet vs. when it's dry. If you have any styling tips also, I would be grately appreciative.
Once again, I apologize for the overextended post, but I truly appreciate you taking the time to read or just browse it over, and I look forward to any and all words of wisdom that you may could share with a wannabe long hair.
Thanks,
Matt
Actualy, Tom Cruise MI2 was also my inspiration for growing out/and my goal length. I didn't get any chuckles when i let that cat out of the bag, so no worries. Most guys here are just glad to welcome you aboard no matter what your motivation. As for the trim, I would reccomend it. Just explain your growth situation and let your stylist go from there. That is of course, provided you trust him/her. The reason i say this, is that I am a teacher in japan. I'm caucasian, and provided i keep my hair short it is very straight. However, i have yet to get a decent cut in japan. It's just a different kind of hair over here. If you are lucky enough to get a korean stylist who has even touched, let alone cut foreign hair, the only thing they will be able to do is cut it. They can't give you a style, as they dont have any understanding or experience of how your hair will natuarly lay. Avoid any cut whatsoever once you leave the US. Trust me, I've been mutilated every 4-6 weeks, no matter where I go for the last year.
Thanks a bunch for the words of words of wisdom and the warm welcome. So far, I've had one experience having my hair cut overseas while in Morocco and needless to say they cut much more off than I certainly expected, but the damage was already done. A female friend of mine whom just returned from South Korea recently said that men and women use gender specific salons over there, but because of my attempt to grow longer hair, she recommended that I visit the womens' salon as a precaution. Needless to say that I'll be sure to have it cut before I go.
Thanks,
Matt
A female friend of mine whom just returned from South Korea recently said that men and women use gender specific salons
With regard to the trim, go with Antesse's advice. He is spot on. As for the salons, It's the same here. The biggest problem though is that korean and japanese fashion sense is very differeent from what we would consider to fashionable. as such, many people just cut hair in any number of bizzare ways. i have yet to see, or recieve an even well rounded cut. they love to jagged edge razor cut everything also. it helps to achieve a discheveled layer look. but again, only for really straight hair. just to show you what i mean about odd mens fashion and hair, take a look at my wedding pic from early this month. this is not a style that would work outside of asia, at least on a man anyway. lol
Hi,
Glad you've joined us. My personal opinion is use a good shampoo and conditioner as often as your type of hair needs it. Stay away from trimming,cutting and worrying. You WILL go through an awkward stage that can be very discouraging but it will pass. I started at the end of Jan. 05 from a crew cut. I am doing fine.Never a trim.This Photo is from a month or two back.
Thanks for the advice Quester. I know that a great shampoo and conditioner are two of the essential ingredients for healthy looking hair. For the past six months or so, I've been playing trial and error to find out which products work best for my hair type. Currently I'm using Pureology Super Straight shampoo accompanied by Pureology Volumizing Conditioner. Before I found the site, I was washing my hair everyday. However after reading many of the posts, I found where some recommended skipping the shampoo every few washes and just use the conditioner or even water to allow the natural oils to penetrate the hair. It's too soon to tell, but seeing as I have fine dry-looking hair to begin with, it just might do the trick.
Thanks,
Matt
Welcome among us.
Waiting for the front to grow fast enough is often the hard part. I myself am still waiting for the shortest of my front hairs to meet with my low ponytail in the back and with each passing week I delight in seeing fewer and fewer strands remain loose when I make my tail.
Your hair may be growing uniformly--an inch straight down in the back and an inch over the curve of your head may not both look like an inch. If you are troubled by the "mullet" look while on the way to the true longhair look, you can get the back trimmed so that all of hair comes to more of the same point...so imagine if you had the full ponytail and then had a few inches off of every hair in the tail...so that with those inches of growth, you'd have the standard ponytail. Whatever the case, do not get your front hairs trimmed at all as each inch will be an inch you must regrow. In the long run, you want to avoid all trims unless to adjust length. Your hair should grow about a half inch a month and if you get frequent trims, this growth will be cut off by a trim every month or two. Some people say trims are needed to maintain quality of the ends of the hair (like the whole "split ends" debate) but I never noticed any problem and some say to just find the bad ends and trim individual ends yourself.
My styling tip for you is to try everything you can at least once including hair restraints and accessories. Our female counterparts have a blinding range of tools and tricks at their disposal and most people just immediately say those things are "girly" without giving them a chance. Some things look just fine and actually work quite nicely. I myself am exploring the use of hair sticks / chopsticks. Using bandannas, Alice bands (think of what Alice from Alice in Wonderland wears except they come in many styles and shapes), hair clips, barrettes, clasps all might work as well. You could also try a few gels and sprays although some may disagree out of damage to hair. But a quick spray might make all the difference. Personally, my hair still misbehaves with lots of the "sport-strength" gel in...so I know how unruly hair can be. A last comment on styles is to also consider locations of ponytails. The ponytail can be made anywhere on the head using any grouping of hair. And so, when your hair gets longer but not long enough to have one tail in the back, you can gather your front hair and make a half-tail high up on the head with the long back hair loose and down. This style doesn't look as bad as one may think and anyone with confidence can make it look right.
Sorry for the long response...
Cheers,
David a.k.a. "Antesse"
Thanks for the warm welcome Antesse! I'm delighted to meet so many wonderful and insightful people such as yourself on this board and am certainly looking forward to becoming one of the community. I truly appreciate your advice on trims. Today I found out that I have roughly another month or so before my departure, so I plan to hold off on the cut until a few days before; that way it'll give the sides time to grow and hopefully blend in nicely enough when I have the back trimmed. Thanks for also including some styling tips and accesories that I could possibly use. Actually up until recently, I was using my Maui Jim shades as a faux Alice band and it actually didn't look bad at all; unfortunately I lost them to a big wave while skimboarding last month, so I've been sporting my Ivy Cap much of the time ever since. I'm not sure if I can get away with wearing an actual Alice band here in the South, but from what I hear, Seoul is an incredibly metrosexual place, so I'll certainly bring one along and give it a try. I'll also see about sporting some of the other accessories just to give them a whirl as I'd hate to just glob my hair down with multitudes of product. I'll be sure to keep you informed on the accessory front as I give them a try. Thanks again for the warm welcome and insight and I look forward to being an active member of this community!
About Alice bands, I know there are manly Alice bands out there. There was a site called www.manbands.com had some like some athletes wear. Some famous soccer guy is famous for them. Unfortunately, the site seems to either be down or has closed.
Keep in touch on the forum.
Hi Matt,
First of all, I would like to extend my warmest welcome to you, and am delighted that you have found our community.
You have a great start to a fabulous head of hair. The best advice I can give is a simple one, just avoid the scissors for now. The awkward stage can be a bit frustrating in the beginning, but if you stick with it, the rewards are VERY well worth it. Don't worry about the back growing too quickly for now, everything tends to even out eventually, and you can always consider a small trim down the road if you wish the front to catch up with the back. Howewever, I would certainly wait a while until you do that. I am looking forward to following your journey to long hair.
Keep it growing,
David
Hey David,
Thanks for the warm welcome and the sound advice. I was actually planning on getting a trim next week since I would be down that way visiting a friend(my salon is 95 miles away; used to be only 60, but then I had to do the whole move thing temporarily:), but since my departure date has been postponed to sometime later next month, I'm just gonna stick it out for now. I'll probably end up having the back trimmed before I leave(I'll be adamant about not coming remotely close to the front with a pair of clippers:), but after that, I'm just gonna sit back and let 'er grow. By the way, I love your hair and beard; very impressive! I'll be sure to keep you up to date as my hair progresses. I am quite sure that I'll require a great deal encouragement to continue the journey once I enter the awkward stage as I tend to put quite a bit of weight on other folks' opinions. Thankfully I'll be in a foreign country, so it might not be as bad compared to being in the States, and more specifically, the South. Thanks again for the warm welcome, the compliments, and I look forward to sharing my journey with yourself and the rest of the community.
--Matt
Matt,
It's looking great! Don't give up.
The best advice I can give about shampoos is to try Lush solids, specifically "New".
The best advice I can give about surviving the awkward stage is to get a favorite hat/cap and stay away from sissors.
Welcome to the MLHH!
Banana
Thanks for the compliments Banana! It's still manageable at the moment, though I've been sporting my Ivy Caps often. Actually after reading through suggestions in some of the other posts, I began using a beanie after showering to kind of shape it up and keep the frizz under control and it seems to be working(at least at this stage). Thanks for the advice on the Lush shampoo; I've never tried a shampoo stick before, but after reading so many positive reviews, will most certainly give it a try. Once I hit the awkward stage though, I'm sure I'll be moaning and groaning and will certainly need a pick me up from you wonderful guys and gals. Thanks for the welcome and I'll be sure to keep ya posted.
Thanks,
Matt
Welcome Matt...
Its great you found us here on mlhh.. You'll love it here.
I think your hair looks fine so far. I too had a trim almost 6 months ago just to keep the mullet look under wraps. Don't get me wrong.. the back of my hair is still longer than the front; but the front and back are close enough now to prevent that true "mullet" look. If you google "mullet" under images you'll see some true mullets.
Anyway; its all about preference as to what you think looks acceptable to you. Maybe you could just get the small trim in back only and then let'er grow.. Good hair comes from the quality of care you take with it ... shampoos and conditionioners. - not really in the trims- or lack of. However; thats just my .02 cent..
Again... welcome to the board...
Be Blessed..
Tristan