new thread
Hello board. I'm sure most of the regulars are sick of hearing about some of the newer players in the long hair game posting topics about perceived problems, worries, etc, but I honestly need some feedback here.
Overall, I've been able to manage my curly hair thus far without it ever looking too unpleasant (although many would say this is part of the fun of the awkward stage). The longer time needed to see more length with curly hair isn't what bothers me, though.
It seems no matter what I try, my hair never really feels soft or well cared for. It always feels dry and brittle and I completely dread washing day (I tend to avoid washing my hair at all for three days at a time). Sure, it looks alright (according to family and friends, and even some strangers) most of the time, but I don't see this problem going away with added length. If anything, it seems like it would be even harder to make my hair feel alright once past the shoulders. I've tried silicone free products, water only washes, conditioner only washes, various styling products, rinsing with distilled water, you name it.
There's only so much one can do to alter the hair's nature without going too far or really damaging it, and I don't want to do that. Has anyone had this same problem go away with added length?
Peace,
Ryan
Keep in mind that, once you settle on a low-impact care routine, that hair must GROW OUT under its reign to reflect the routine's benefits. You may not notice the effect of your low-impact routine for a year. That is how long it takes to get the hair up top on your head and maybe down to your ears to be soft and silky. At that time, hair below your ears will still be funky.
What this means is that you can't really run through all the possibilities like it is a lab experiment. You won't live long enough to. You have to listen to others and then settle on a routine that has promise based on what you have heard.
Bill
Wow, that long, huh? Well, if I've stuck it out this long, I might as well keep at it. I suppose I could be just a tad paranoid as well. Its possible that my idea of soft, well cared for hair is a bit unrealistic. Thanks for sharing some of your knowledge, Bill.
Yeah, I use that. Thanks for the suggestion though.
Have you tried one formulated specifically for dry hair? Or perhaps a weekly leave-in treatment?
Shampoo + condition on you normal wash cycle (in that order - hate to state the obvious.) Then once a week add a leave in conditioner.
Try this range: http://www.redken.com/products/displayBrand.cfm?b=262
Agreed - try different conditioners until you find one that works for you. I've not used this stuff myself (I use Redken and Aussie) but you might try the products at www.jessicurl.com
Hope it helps.
Yeah, Jessicurl is a pretty good line, as is Redken. Those products have produced some of the best results I've seen. Thanks guys.
Try to leave the conditioner in and you should see a huge difference at least i did. I don't even use (leave in) conditioner just normal one that I don't rinse out and it leaves my hair soft and straight and does no damage...i mean its conditioner why would it damage my hair if i left it in.
-animosity
Hmm... I recall trying that a few times, but I'll experiment a bit more. Thanks for the idea.
Exactly! Conditioner is your friend. Reading between the lines since my return (and I could be wrong) but I think there's an undercurrent of fear about conditioner in some quarters... almost like its too much of a metrosexual product to use.
Not that I'm getting this impression from RyanK, but there have been a couple of posters who'd expressed concerns or expected others to have concerns about using something as trivial as conditioner.
Of course use too much of the wrong kind, and you'll end up with a build-up which might leave your hair lank, but that's nothing that can't be cured by washing your hair with shower gel once every 6-8 weeks, or better yet using a Clarifying (harsh) Shampoo.
There are various oils that you can use to help retain moisture; jojoba oil and unrefined coconut oil come to mind. Also, EVOO (Extra Virgin Olive Oil) is a good treatment to put in and leave for an hour or so and then wash out. You might also try the leave in conditioner mentioned prior.
This may sound weird, but once when doing the EVOO treatment it left my hair incredibly soft, but so much so that it got about three times as poofy as normal and lost most of its curl. It was extremely odd, and I've not been able to replicate much success with various oil treatments (including jojoba) consistently. More practice should help, though. Thanks.
I follow most of the general recommendations I've seen on this and other long hair sites (use only a small amount of shampoo when I even bother shampooing, rinse conditioner with ultra cold water, massage scalp to distribute oil, never brush, only comb occasionally, protect hair from prolonged sun exposure). I don't want to give the impression that I'm doing something wrong that could be easily avoided with a bit of research.
Thanks to those who have responded thus far, I am reading and considering all suggestions.
Got to be honest mate, I've never:
> rinsed conditioner with ultra cold water
> massaged my scalp to distribute oil
> avoided brushing/combing occasionally
> or worried about protecting hair from prolonged sun exposure
Frankly I think all those techniques are bull.
OK - don't scold your scalp, but there's no need to freeze yourself by showing in cold water when rinsing out conditioner.
Combing (with a fine tooth comb) distributes natural scalp oils far better than massaging your scalp, and its highly debatable that massaging your scalp even stimulates the production of oil. Again it arguable that combing would do it better. As for sun exposure, I'd encourage it unless you have very fair hair, as it'll give you cool natural highlights.
Not trying to teach you to suck eggs hear, but you said it yourself that using leave-in conditioner produced some of the best results you've seen, so I think you already know where to start.
Interesting perspective, though to disagree with one of your points, if I use anything approaching a fine tooth comb on my hair it ends up looking disastrous. Again, thanks for responding to the topic, I am going to approach things pretty carefully and not come to any conclusions too soon.
Peace,
Ryan
Yeah, I accept that, fine tooth combs can be disastrous with certain hair types.
I guess what I'm getting at is there are a lot of myths out there which when looked at logically fall apart. Other notions get exaggerated, the cold rinse theory is one such example, clearly there's logic in not rinsing your hair in super-hot water, but there's no meaningful reason why you should avoid warm water, there is no evidence to suggest that rinsing in cold water vs. warm water makes your hair softer/healthier.
I'll agree with the conditioner crowd it works best for me as well.
But the results may not be instant so you'll have to keep at it. Like Bill said adopt a routine that makes sense and in time things will improve.
Kevin
Dear Ryan K,
Based on your AVITAR, you have fine hair. You are a unique person in all the universe, and your hair is unique to you. It will never be like Bill's nor Jasons, nor Sorted's,nor Caledonian's, nor Urbanhippy's, as much as we admire their flowing locks. But unless you post some photos to the contrary, I think you have great hair.
When I learned that the great Holy Eckard Pharmaceutical Church was closing, to be consumed by a new sect called Rite Aid, and was sellng their sacraments at reduced prices, I bought one of almost everyone and have nearly systematically tried all of them.: shampoos, conditioners, mice which guarantee curls, mice which guarantee straight, and mice wich guarantee thickness, I have come to the conclusion that they are almost all the same, and I have found none of them which makes my hair look like Bill's, who I consider to be my ideal.
What I have discovered is this.
Avoid silicones, for they would get a comb through a brillo pad, and it still would not look good.
Do not use shampoo more than once a week.
Use conditioner daily, if yoou wash your hair daily. I would like to avoid washing my hair daily, but I am physically active and my lymph system soaks my skin and hair wilting whatever artificial construction I have achieved on the previous day.
In this case, I wash my body thoroughly, but use a good conditioner in my hair without shampoo, and rince it out with water as cold as my back will tolerate.
I towell dry my hair, and then add some VO-5 or other quality oil which I get at a premium grocery -- I find walnut, almond, etc. just as good as jojoba, and am never convinced I am getting the authentic product when I pay high $ for the jojabo, but am fully confident of the quality of the nut oils from the grocery.
Massaging this through my hair, I comb it, never never never with a fine tooth comb, but with my digits or a very wide tooth comb, careful not to pull, then I towell dry it again, for the oil emulsifies with the water, and takes a lot of water out.
Then depending on time, I comb my hair carefully, in sections, down from sides and backs, and at the very ends carefully wrap my finger around the end, and if I am relatively still, like reading or writing, the lock naturally forms into a spiral curl. I think this is fun around friends.
But If I am going out into the big wide world to face reactionary forces who might wish to suppress me, then I use very large wire rollers and roll my hair away from my face, hopefully allowing at least two hours for air drying, and at worst 25 minutes under an old portable hood drier which I inherited from my mom.
Fortunately I have two friends, Allen and Barbara, who are often here, and willing to roll my hair. If necessary I do it myself. The amazing out come, is that 1" to 1 1/2 inch rollers remarkably straighten my hair and make it smoothe. It is not haard for an engineeer to do, and a good countcime is sure without perfection of technique.
I know many men resist this intervention, for they for some reasons attach gender status to what is simply a tool.
I am semi retired, so this is relatively easy for me for I need do it more than once or twice a week, and as long as I do not get sweaty which makes the curl return, I can pin my hair straight at night, and face the hostile repressive elements of our culture during the day without a new makeover.
I do know some men whose wives put them through a similar routine daily. I'd be willing to do this, but would hate to get up at 6:30 AM to achieve the outcome.
More I could say about this, but for those of us who are really long haired men, the trouble is worth it, just as for those of us who are committed to having healthy teeth, the long ritual of flossing is also worth it.
I consider these personal maintainance routines meditation time, which helps me keep focused and centered, and not a waste of time nor a distraction from the important matters in life like working for a transparant and honest government.
Cal.
Actually here's a bit of trivia I got my stylist who really knows her stuff. Silicones are found in many shampoos and almost all conditioners, they help smooth out your hair. They give your hair a degree of protection against heat styling (straightening and blow drying) and also help to artificially reconstruct damaged hair.
Generally speaking if your shampoo is creamy in colour & texture it contains silicones, if its clear like Herbal Essences then it doesn't. Your conditioner however, will almost always be creamy.
To many silicones and your hair will suffer from a build-up but this can be cleared by washing your hair with either a clarifying shampoo or (if your not inclined to buy one) ordinary shower gel once every 6 weeks.
So it's really a question of everything in moderation. But if you "overdose" on CONES then the fix is simple.
One other pearl of wisdom...
None silicone shampoos tend to have organic ingredients, people with dandruff or other scalp irritations may find these irritate their condition. Whereas, the products containing silicones tend to be better tolerated by people with sensitive skin. From personal experience, I used MOP (Modern Organic Products) for a while and it really aggravated a fungal infection on my neck line, I switched to RedKen and provided I use the medicated shampoo once a fortnight I don't get a re-occurrence of the problem.
Well, all I can say is thank you for your great response and advice. I can definitely agree with most of your thoughts on the matter.
I think I've also come to accept that my hair won't ever look just like anybody else's. We'll see what the future brings.
Ryan
Dear Ryan K,
Based on your AVITAR, you have fine hair. You are a unique person in all the universe, and your hair is unique to you. It will never be like Bill's nor Jasons, nor Sorted's,nor Caledonian's, nor Urbanhippy's, as much as we admire their flowing locks. But unless you post some photos to the contrary, I think you have great hair.
When I learned that the great Holy Eckard Pharmaceutical Church was closing, to be consumed by a new sect called Rite Aid, and was sellng their sacraments at reduced prices, I bought one of almost everyone and have nearly systematically tried all of them.: shampoos, conditioners, mice which guarantee curls, mice which guarantee straight, and mice wich guarantee thickness, I have come to the conclusion that they are almost all the same, and I have found none of them which makes my hair look like Bill's, who I consider to be my ideal.
What I have discovered is this.
Avoid silicones, for they would get a comb through a brillo pad, and it still would not look good.
Do not use shampoo more than once a week.
Use conditioner daily, if yoou wash your hair daily. I would like to avoid washing my hair daily, but I am physically active and my lymph system soaks my skin and hair wilting whatever artificial construction I have achieved on the previous day.
In this case, I wash my body thoroughly, but use a good conditioner in my hair without shampoo, and rince it out with water as cold as my back will tolerate.
I towell dry my hair, and then add some VO-5 or other quality oil which I get at a premium grocery -- I find walnut, almond, etc. just as good as jojoba, and am never convinced I am getting the authentic product when I pay high $ for the jojabo, but am fully confident of the quality of the nut oils from the grocery.
Massaging this through my hair, I comb it, never never never with a fine tooth comb, but with my digits or a very wide tooth comb, careful not to pull, then I towell dry it again, for the oil emulsifies with the water, and takes a lot of water out.
Then depending on time, I comb my hair carefully, in sections, down from sides and backs, and at the very ends carefully wrap my finger around the end, and if I am relatively still, like reading or writing, the lock naturally forms into a spiral curl. I think this is fun around friends.
But If I am going out into the big wide world to face reactionary forces who might wish to suppress me, then I use very large wire rollers and roll my hair away from my face, hopefully allowing at least two hours for air drying, and at worst 25 minutes under an old portable hood drier which I inherited from my mom.
Fortunately I have two friends, Allen and Barbara, who are often here, and willing to roll my hair. If necessary I do it myself. The amazing out come, is that 1" to 1 1/2 inch rollers remarkably straighten my hair and make it smoothe. It is not haard for an engineeer to do, and a good countcime is sure without perfection of technique.
I know many men resist this intervention, for they for some reasons attach gender status to what is simply a tool.
I am semi retired, so this is relatively easy for me for I need do it more than once or twice a week, and as long as I do not get sweaty which makes the curl return, I can pin my hair straight at night, and face the hostile repressive elements of our culture during the day without a new makeover.
I do know some men whose wives put them through a similar routine daily. I'd be willing to do this, but would hate to get up at 6:30 AM to achieve the outcome.
More I could say about this, but for those of us who are really long haired men, the trouble is worth it, just as for those of us who are committed to having healthy teeth, the long ritual of flossing is also worth it.
I consider these personal maintainance routines meditation time, which helps me keep focused and centered, and not a waste of time nor a distraction from the important matters in life like working for a transparant and honest government.
Cal.