new thread
I've been ridiculed and made fun of and pretty much tortured for the last 7 months by my peers. My mom used to want me to cut my hair and spike it, like i used to. Well, a few days ago a had a talk with her and she agreed to let me grow my hair as long as I want BUT I have to get either an undercut or a trim every 3 months. I chose getting trims. I felt so relieved, like a weight had been lifted off of my back. Until yesterday. I was walking to my next class in school and some guy with short, spikey, bleach blonde hair came up to me and asked if I were a boy or a girl. I told him that I am a boy. He said that I was a "faggot" because of my hair. So, I kicked his ass and got detention for a week. I'm so sick of being harassed. I honestly don't care what people think of me or my hair. But, calling me a fag is not acceptable. I'm going to talk to the principle and see what he has to say. Just wanted to get that off my chest.
So don't consider them your peers! I never had problems with "peer
pressure" when I was a kid because I didn't consider the idiots my
peers, just idiots. Ignore them.
-Zorba
I made that decision too just recently Zorba(and in my opinion I didn't do it soon enough)
Great!
When I was a teen, my peers were all adults...
-Zorba
You too? I could never really connected with my so-called "peers" which would mean anyone my age. As I grew older, I had found myself distancing from these kind of people, and with adults I could actually maintain an intellectual converstaion, who would look past all the things on the outside and into deeper into my mind. For instance hair. Most peple on this planet find long hair on men strange(especially children), but with most adults I know it is usually not and issue, unless they would comment on how good it feels and looks.
Interesting...
Not only "me too", but to a certain extent "Still"! At 41 I still find that I connect better with those 10 + years older than me, and,
oddly enough, those 10 - years younger!
Even now I find most people about my age to be annoying at the least.
Most seem to be very fuddy-duddyish. Especially about things like
long hair and my earrings. I guess the older ones either were more
rebelious, or are at a life stage where they understand, whereas the
younger ones are either more rebelious or are still at a life stage
where it's "cool". or "tight" I think the current lingo is...
I particularly get along well with those 20 or 30 years older than I,
even with the long hair and earrings; indeed, this is the crowd I
associate with most - just as I always have. I have far more friends
in their 60's, 70's and even 80's and 90's than I do in the late 30's
early 40's.
-Zorba
Right on, Zorba. You could almost be decribing me (except for earrings).
There sure seem to be a lot of "us", don't there? You should try
earrings, they're a lot of fun!
-Zorba
So what type of earrings do you mostly wear? At work also?
At work also? You betcha! In this day and age, a guy should be
able to wear a pair of small studs (at the very least) and not have
any comments from anyone. I'm luckier than most, my employer is
very progressive - thus I can wear larger ones at work.
I've found that, in general, I get more comments about my hair than
I do my earrings!
I wear larger studs (smaller ones would disappear under my hair),
and dangles, some of them quite outrageous. As my motto is "keep
'em guessing", I avoid most earrings that are cliche - I don't wear
the usual small hoops or 'barbels' that most guys wear, I don't wear
skulls or skeletons, and I don't wear diamond studs. And I have
both ears pierced (once) - I don't like the "lopsided" one earringed
look, I'm a symetrical kind of a guy! Oh, and I have one pair of
LARGE, thin white gold hoops (3 inches).
I'm always on the lookout for more earrings - I'm picky, most look
too feminine, as you might expect. So I pass up 100 pairs for every
pair I buy. The only way to tell is to hold them up to your ear and
see for yourself. They're a LOT of fun. But then, I'm really into
earrings - can't you tell? I only had my ears pierced last year for
my 40th birthday.
-Zorba
For the earring info and directly or indirectly encouragement re earrings.
Since you like symetrical you probably don't go for the two in one ear
and one in the other bit.
Nope, if I were to do that, I'd do two in each ear. As it is, I'm
a conservative - one per ear is fine!
-Zorba
A couple of message boards on the subject:
http://clubs.yahoo.com/clubs/oldermenwhowearearrings
http://clubs.yahoo.com/clubs/employeeswithearrings
Not a lot of activity, but interesting reading.
-Zorba
Hey great for you to have permission, I could use some counseling on that because the "When are you getting a haircut?" question is becoming very common, but she hates long hair on men. She calls everyone she sees with long hair, a sissy or says they look like girls, but I don't want to cut, I can finally feel my hair moves independently and freely (only when wet, I haven't relaxed)
How bad was the situation with your mom? How did you convince her?
Way to go Mike, did you get him good? :) Back in school, had I gotten into that situation, I would have taken it with my tail between my legs. Glad to hear you stood up for yourself and put him in his place like that.
Like the great band AC/DC once wrote,
"For those about to rock, We salute you!"
Not sure if this would work, but if it happens again, you might try asking him what kind of guy he is to be paying so much attention to another guy's hair. I've heard that a reason for insults like that is that the guy is insecure about his sexuality.
It's funny that the guy who insulted you himself had bleached hair. It wasn't all that long ago that that would have been a "girly" thing for a guy to do.
Doug
I'll second Zorba's comments!
If you really want to come back with a snappy response, there are many on this board (I particularly like "So I can look like you?). But that could just aggravate/ escalate the situation.
If they can't get any response from you, half their fun is gone.
BTW: it's 'principal', not principle'. Sorry :).
First of all, how can anyone with spikey, short, bleached blonde hair talk about other people's hair? When this hideous trend wears off a lot of people will look back in shame on those days when they did that to their hair. It sipmly is UGLY. Well, everyone is entitled to wear their hair however they want, but to make fun of other peoples hair when they have such horrendous hair themselves? Oh well, this world is full of fashion victims anyway.
Zorba is right, they are not your peers, ignore them. Doug is right too, not so long ago a guy who bleached his hair would be called girly (and that's wrong, if a guy wants to bleach his hair is he's problem, even though it's ugly), so don't worry, sooner or later that trend will disapear and when it does you will have great hair, unlike those spikey heads around.
most gay guys have very short hair. and why dont those stupid teenage boys call the members of kiss a fag, or def lepard, or metallica? psychologists found that homophobia is the result of repressed homosexual urges that a person denies or is unaware of. and every gay guy i know was anti-gay before he came out of the closet. so if they give you shit again, just call them a stupid closet queer!!!