new thread
"Why would anyone want to have their hair so long?"
OK, here are my top ten favorite answers to respond to moronic shorthairs who are clueless about having any basic good manners in the first place:
1) Because it helps me find a good parking space at Christmas time
2) Because I have 4 cats, and they told me to grow it, --- or they'd stop paying my rent
3) Because my job requires it. I'm Santa, by the way, --- and I can tell you right now: no presents for you this year!
4) Well, gee, your wife sure likes it... in fact, she likes it a LOT!!!!
5) Doctors orders. I totally HATE it long myself, of course, --- in fact, I can't understand why anyone on Earth would ever want to run around town looking like a girl with a beard! But, my allergist says I have no choice in the matter. Golly, I sure wish I could be YOU!!
6) It's against my religion to cut it. I'm a dyslexic agnostic insomniac, by the way, who stays awake all night wondering about the existence of Dog. That has absolutely nothing to do with my hair length; but, there's your answer, anyway!
7) Because most gay men are attracted to short haircuts, --- and I'm into depriving and denying myself of dates!
8) Long?
9) OMG, I can't believe I forgot to go to the barber last week! Shoot!! Do you think Supercuts is still open at this hour? I'd better hurry: I certainly don't want anyone else on the street to see me look like THIS!!!
10) My mother forces me to wear my hair long like this, --- and she's very, VERY rich!!! She is so evil and manipulative that she'll take me out of her will if I cut one single lock of it... Oh, dear God [dramatic sigh], although I am very grateful that I have no sibling around to compete with me over getting her millions, I keep praying that she'll die soon, --- then I can be free!!! FREE!!! FREE!!!!!!!
--- So, there's my input on how to aswer the brain-dead and ettiquette deprived & unenlightened...
- Ken in San Francisco
You have made my day. For years this has been one of my favorite jokes, and I have never heard anyone else tell it, or even find that many that get it. Thanks, Ken; now I know there is someone else out there with a warped sense of humor!
I liked #3 and #4 the best
Oh that is a brillaint, brilliant list.... The one feigning forgettign to get a haircut last week really tickles me.
personally, when people (usually those with shaved heads who regard anyone with more than an inch of hair to be a hippie) ask me why i'm growing my hair out, i do a simallar thing in which i say i just havent had the time or money to have a haircut for a while and quickyl change the subject...
Lately, I just tell the truth:
1) My girlfriend likes it long
2) I think it is kinda cool to have what looks like short thin hair next to hers.
#2 lets me then freak them out further by gesturing at my ankles.
LOL, --- only you, Robert, could have a a reply like that ready to throw back at them! And WOW, that must be some amazing head of hair that your girlfriend has!!!! Did you two first meet at one of those LHS longhair meet-ups? I hope to meet her someday!
Thanks for the reply, and I hope you both have a wonderful Holiday season!
- Ken
I dunno...some variation on "my significant other likes my hair" is a good standard response, for anyone.
The rest of it, well, let's just say that I've had plenty of reminders to think up a good response to this question over the years.
Online first (on TLHC), then at meets, hiking as friends, then more than friends, her choice. Yep. Amazing! Currently trimming for thickness at ankle.
All reports are that she's having a great time in New Zealand at the moment, I'll be working overtime at Muni (for 3X, which is a certain type of consolation for the girlfriend being 8000 miles away), then we'll have a long weekend over New Years before she flies home.
Thanks!
Hi Ken, I am not able to think of 10 reasons, but I can
think of a few.
Long hair costs less. Haircuts are costly. I have saved
thousands of dollars in the past 15 years by not getting
it cut.
Hair length is a good indicator of health. The longer the
hair the healthier the person is, generally. Cut it short
and that indicator is gone.
For me, long hair makes recognizing people easier. Short
haired guys of similar height, age, and hair colour are
nearly impossible for me to tell apart. I have poor facial
recognition and rely on hair to identify people. Longhairs
look very different from each other to me.
Scott
LMAO, Ken, you always crack me up but this time you surpassed yourself. Merry Christmas to you and I'll try to use one of your top 10 reasons whenever someones asks me why im growing my hair ! :D
That's so funny, Ken!