new thread
Firstly I want to offer my Xmas greetings to all the fine people on this board.
Aside from xmas it is also that time of the year where romance is higher than normal...
As a single man currently growing hair out... I have wondered whether this would jeopardise my chances of finding a partner. I am quite aware many longhairs on here have partners but I'm not sure if they were your partners before you had longhair...
I keep my hair well looked after.. obviously if you feel good within your own skin you will attract more women as confidence is rated highly by all women.
If anyone wants to discuss their experiences with women when you had short hair v's when you had long hair let me know.
Occasionally I frequent nightclubs where people tend to judge on appearance only. But I don't drink as much alcohol as I used to... so its hard to tell whether more women are attracted to me or not! but its really cool having hair longer than 95% of the men in there!
Short hair
Current hair
From the back
I can get better pictures of me with my longhair.. and I am much happier with it now v's my old shorthair.
Let me know your thoughts - PEACE
Ryan S
Geting girls has almost nothing to do with your appearance. Don´t´t believe me? I have seen many "ugly" men with girls. Bald, fat... doesn´t matter. What you need is to know how to handle girls, be social and masculine.
In other words. Grow your hair, if you are good with the ladies, then it wont change. If you don´t know how to handle the girls, things will stay the same too. They might say it´s because of the hair but that´s just BS.
Men focus on appearance when choosing a mate. We get attracted to looks first. Girls however gets attracted to social, masculine guys who don´t take shit from people.
Having long hair might teach you to not take shit from people, because of the negative comments you get. So in that case, yeah, it might increase your chances.
Bottomline, do what YOU want. YOU are the man, YOU make the choices. Once you master this attitude, the girls will come.
Eric Anders,
Mate i must say that women do judge on appearance, first impression is always what they think as they look at you. Girls who are attracted to long haired guys are definatly not the majority that want a uber masculine jackass to treat them like dirt.
Most "common" girls will look at a guy with long hair and say "ewww" thats wrong, look at his hair, omg only girls should have hair like that.
I dont think we would want to attract these kind of women anyway because from what i can see Erik with the music you have posted, your a metal fan and therefore any girl who dosen't like long hair is going to have almost nothing in common with you, so you shouldnt care what they think.
Now i find that the girls that talk to me and give me attension, are the ones that have alot in common with me, and the ones that give stinking looks are usually the girls who i have absolutly nothing in common with anyway.
Ryan S,
I think the kind of women that attend "nightclubs" were 95% of the guys have short hair, are usually looking for guys with short hair sadly.
I have two answers to that:-
1) Yes they do judge by appearance, but it's a matter of preferring clean and tidy over scruffy and dirty, not short hair over long hair. The previous poster was right in saying they will prefer a bald guy with a big nose often over a good looking guy with nice hair, but I would add that is only true IF the big-nosed baldy is clean and tidy and the other guy just crawled out of bed or looks like he just crawled through a hedge;
2) Nightclubs and longhairs are a bad combo, plus only ultra pushy guys succeed in that setting, so try elsewhere, or maybe visit one with your girlfriend if she insists, but don't expect to pick anyone up there
Yeah, of course, they do judge by appearance. As do everybody. You must keep your hair clean. And of course, wear proper clothes etc.
The question you asked however was if the hair itself, the length of it, would make a difference. And to that, the answer is no.
Attraction is not a choice. Yes, most women will say that they prefer short hair. Aswell as saying they want a tall, dark, muscular, handsome, funny man with deep blue eyes.
The point is, it doesn´t matter if you are bald or have hair down to your knees. If you know your way around women.
I still think you underestimate how shallow some people can be mate.
Some women will never even think of going with a guy that has long hair, no matter what his personality is like or how he dresses or how healthy his hair is.
Yeah, you´re right. They won´t think about it. When the charming long haired guy comes forwards and sweep them off their feet, what they think doesn´t matter anymore. Because he makes them FEEL. :)
Everyone has their own ideas of what is "attractive", and their own priorities for the qualities in a mate. Some people put the physical appearances first. Me, I have my preferences in what I want a man to look like, but the personality is more important.
Something to think on: Why are you growing your hair? To "look cool"? A way to thumb your nose at "da man"? Or do you feel there is a deeper spiritual thing (whatever it may be)? If your long hair is part of *you*, part of your identity, do you want a mate who rejects that, or at best hopes it will be just a phase?
It goes both ways, too. If you're in an interesting conversation with a girl who doesn't fit the current societal standards of beauty, do you walk away to talk to a "hottie" who can't keep track of a conversation past "How are you"?
Now, if your hair is a home for the fleas, a hive for the buzzing bees, and a nest for birds, I wouldn't blame any woman for keeping her distance.
Juli this is a brilliant reply would you mind if I quote you in the future as we get this question periodically?
Beyond that I don't have anything to add.
Kevin
I'd be honored.
I have to say a well balanced reply and it can apply to any of the sexes.
Cheers,
John.B
Well, for another woman's perspective I'll say that personality counts for more that physical appearance. If I had to make a list of physical traits I like, long hair is definitely one of them, but it's not a make or break sort of thing. Characteristics such as intelligence, kindness, gentlness, inner stength, etc. are far more important to me.
Know yourself, be yourself, and you'll find the right women.
And any woman who's going to blatantly reject you just for long hair isn't worth you time anyway.
Mouse
I'm
married, but I never worried about it. I have been getting a lot of hair compliments lately, albeit nearly all of them from black women, and my son is experiencing something similar, i.e. the black girls at school like his hair, which is over his shoulders. Mind you, he inherits his dad's good looks, LOL! He's yet to have a date (he's 14 and shy), but he's had girls fighting over him, both of them black, mind you. FWIW, some black girls and women seem to have a thing for white guys with long hair. Not PC to say so, but oh well. FYI. my wife is white. No doubt someone will try to twist this in some way to make me seem racist.
So I'm NOT the only one! Since growing my hair I've been getting a disproportional amount of attention from black girls myself. I wonder why that is?
- - haha!! this happens to my boyfriend, as well. how wierd...
I never used to get the time of day from women back when my hair was short, but now they all seem to want to touch it or run their hands through it. I'm not saying they *approve* of it, just that it gets their attention. Being gay I'm not too worried about their acceptance however.
You have a point, this sort of positive attention, whether or not you are on the market isn't a bad thing.
My thought has always been...if they don't like certain things about me, I am better off not being around them. The first date is a test, if we aren't suitable, might as well get it over with right away...so: go for a hike, then have dinner at my regular sushi bar with my hair down (literally and figuratively)...three of my major passions right there.
Happily, my girlfriend passed those tests with flying colors...although long before we started dating.
Personally, this is my take on attraction to long haired men. I have always preferred a fabulous mane to a short haired man. I have noticed through the years though that the popularity of men with long hair is growing. Some of the most beautiful women are now interested in men with long hair. Of course, I will always subscribe to the fact I was a renaissance woman with a passion for locks. One of the main reasons for the attraction is that I have found men with long hair tend to be masculine yet have an artsy, quiet, intellectual beauty. They are sensitive and strong; what a fabulous combination! Tidy or unkempt it doesn’t really matter; it’s all about how you are as a man. As long as you respect yourself and the people (especially women) in your life you will come out mane and shoulders above the rest.
Ryan, Your hair looks great and you have nothing to worry about.
I love long hair, to be honest I dislike short hair. Several of my friends like long hair on guys too, and it seems to get more and more accepted nowadays for guys to have long hair (and for us women to admit that we like it). So you shouldn't be worried :-)