new thread
(English isn't my first language so please bare with me!)
Hi there!
I've been growing my hair for more than 3 years now and as you can imagine, it's pretty damn long. Looking back, I can't even remember why I decided to grow it long in the first place. Maybe because my best friend had long hair or because I was getting into heavy metal and a lot of my idols had long hair or maybe I just thought it would look cool - I don't know. But I do know that I'm sick of having long hair, here are some reasons why:
1) Maintenance.
I have to comb it, wash it with special conditioners and shampoos every day (or every other day) to not look like a complete bum. And my hair still doesn't look exactly the way I want it to! Taking showers has become an extremely annoying procedure. I really miss the good old times when I could just take a shower in 3 minutes and go right outside. Also, I spend quite a lot of money on those shampoos and conditioners. So yeah, this is a major reason.
2) People see my long hair before they see me.
People often judge me before they even get to know me, but I think subconsciously this is one of the reasons why I started growing my hair long. I used to be this really shy, quiet kid. Maybe I thought long hair would give me some sort of identity and other people I could relate to. Maybe I thought it was cooler to be referred as "Joe, the long haired dude" than just Joe. Well I'm not that shy person any more.
3) Sexual appeal. I had no idea that many girls think of long hair as a turnoff. I used to say to myself that girls who don't like you just because you have long hair are just shallow, but that's not right at all! For example, I don't find redheads attractive, does that make me shallow? Of course not, the disliking of long hair on men is just a common preference but I had no idea it was that common. I'm 17 years old and these are my "fooling around years". My long hair is an extra obstacle I have to cross when approaching girls and it's making me miss out.
The only good side of having long hair is that I guess I look cooler on stage with my band. But I think I'd rather look attractive to girls than cool on stage.
I was pretty much ready to go to the barbershop before I met a girl who likes long hair (AND is good looking!!!). But I swear, I'm going to the barbershop the day we break up.
Phew, had to get that off my chest :D So how about you guys? Ever seriously considered cutting your hair?
Then maybe you should make it your goal not to break up
Hi Joe,
To be honest I've got so used to having longhair and I find it low maintenance and I suppose it's part of me and in the past or now considered cutting it. Okay longhair is not for everyone to to have it all their lives and it's a personal choice. There are many people here who have great heads of longhair and would not consider cutting it.
As always the best advice is to think about the 2-week rule and if you still don't want you hair that long then think about getting it cut shorter in stages just in case you change your mind.
I know that having longhair can be associated with certain types of music like rock and metal and as you highlighted you friend was growin their hair out and you liked heavy metal music. Just as a matter of interest what band do you play in/link and listen to any material the band has created.
Look at the positive side, that of having a lady that does appreciate you with longhair and it's not a barrier or a turn off.
There is nothing wrong with seeking advice and you will certainly get that in this.
Cheers,
John.B
Agreed, I'm cutting my hair soon for the same reasons. The maintenance is just ridiculous. An hour a day; 360 hours a year times 4.5 years is like 67.5 days wasted washing, combing, drying my hair. Plus I'm starting Brazilian Jiu Jitsu, and I already do Thai boxing, and it's too annoying.
I like long hair but it's an arbitrary, time wasting purely aesthetic thing. Character comes from within, not from the hair one has like some people on this site would have you think.
So do what you think is best. But don't force yourself to keep long hair if you're truly dissatisfied with it.
Long hair, short hair, bald, whatever. It doesn't matter at all. It's your life and you should do whatever you like concerning such matters. Just be sure that you're not trying to please someone else by cutting your hair, because, it won't work in the long term. Been there, done that.
Good luck.
jeffrey.
they don't like you even with the short hair? BTDT
Then I would think that they didn't like you to begin with. Their problem, not yours.
I'd seek some help!
Cheers,
John.B
get it cut if you must, but don't succumb to pressure from the masses to get a supershort haircut.
chin length is fine, but buzzcuts and military styles will give the impression that you've decided to "join" the mainstream.
Ok now ime getting tired of these sorts of posts.
"Most girls dont like long hair, ime not getting enough so ime gonna cut my hair so all the girls will love me".
This is called " Selling Out"
If your just growing your hair to attract chicks then you are probably not gonna stick with it for more than a few years.
Seriously if the 1 single reason you grew hair was to get girls and your reading this you might aswell shave your head now, becasue guess what! 85+% of Women and apparantly gay men think long hair is repulsive and disgusting on a man, News flash mate.
I personally don't care what women think of the way i look with long hair even if it means ile be single for the rest of my life, if i find a woman that dosent just "accept that its what i am" but actually likes what i am for having long hair then it will be a happy day indeed.
Even if i go bald ime gonna keep the sides long and grow a beard as long as possible. Maybe this says somthing about the kind of person that i am..
Hi Joe,
I sort of feel guilty for posting an earlier thread similar to this!
Have you checked out my women responses yahoo.com thread??
You spend time on maintenance which means you care about yourself and the way you look. Women will this as a positive if anything but I understand what you mean. Shorthair is less time consuming yes BUT the important question is will you be happier with longhair...
People judge you after initially seeing your longhair. Have you read my post within my thread about conformity? if you want a superficial conforming woman then cut your hair just to please them. If you want a long lasting relationship then make sure your woman loves you for 'WHO' you are not 'WHAT' you are.
So far my mobile phone has been silent for a while.... but I'm still considering getting my haircut.. just giving it sometime to think about it I guess....
Do whatever you need to do to feel good about yourself.
Peace
Simply put, if you arent't happy with your hair then maybe a change is what you need. You could keep it long but take off some length or get it layered(forbidden word on this board). You're 17, and you might as well experiment with your hair at this age before the business world takes over. Bear in mind that at this age you can grow it long or cut it short and chances are you'll still have a good head of hair to make another change down the road. It is, afterall, just hair(forbidden phrase). The ultimate issue at hand is your level of happiness that your have concerning your hair. If long hair is still what you want then keep it. If you are at the point where just looking at it and dealing with the maintainence are driving you up the wall, than a change might be called for. Heck, you could even go for something short(there is no crime for "joining" the mainstream). Always remember: it will grow back, and it's not the end of the world if you take a chance, and it doesn't work out. At least, in the end, you can say that you had the courage to take that chance instead of denying what you want because of what everyone else might think about you or say about you.
I'd hardly call layering a forbidden word but if you want to grow your hair again to one length it takes alot longer if it's layered. Why not try "mullet" that may get people fired up!
Cheers,
John.B
Or if I want to get people really fired up there's always the ever so popular "skullet"
Well we wouldn't want your hair to get in the way of fooling around
so perhaps it's best you cut it.
It's interesting we see thses posts all the time and does make
us wonder. So many who have posted similar concerns have regrets
after they do the deed. At the end of the day it's your hair
your life so do what you need to do and move on.
This forum is about growing long hair and keeping it not
cutting it , however I'm not going to beg you not to but
suggets you continue to think about it carefully.
Kevin
If you think it's high maintenance, then the chances are you're doing something wrong!
Seriously, long hair requires a completely different approach to short. NOT more effort or time, just different. Daily washing makes zero sense for long hair, because it dries it out too much. Your hair produces the same amount of oil as you grow it out, but it has to spread further, so if you wash it every day it will be as dry as a haystack (and maybe look a little like one, LOL!). If you must wash it every day, I would seriously suggest using only water. OTOH, when you use shampoo you must follow it with conditioner, but a couple of times a week is the most number of times you should be shampooing (unless it isn't really long).
Woah! Thanks guys, I wasnÂ’t expecting that many responses!
Then maybe you should make it your goal not to break up
Well we broke up. She turned out to be a manipulative and shallow backstabber. The bitch was just using me.
Seriously, long hair requires a completely different approach to short. NOT more effort or time, just different. Daily washing makes zero sense for long hair, because it dries it out too much. Your hair produces the same amount of oil as you grow it out, but it has to spread further, so if you wash it every day it will be as dry as a haystack (and maybe look a little like one, LOL!). If you must wash it every day, I would seriously suggest using only water. OTOH, when you use shampoo you must follow it with conditioner, but a couple of times a week is the most number of times you should be shampooing (unless it isn't really long).
Actually I do have to wash it at least every other day or it just gets way to oily and IÂ’ll look like a bum.
so perhaps it's best you cut it.
It's interesting we see thses posts all the time and does make
us wonder. So many who have posted similar concerns have regrets
after they do the deed. At the end of the day it's your hair
your life so do what you need to do and move on.
This forum is about growing long hair and keeping it not
cutting it , however I'm not going to beg you not to but
suggets you continue to think about it carefully.
Tell you what, IÂ’m getting it cut 01/01/08 and IÂ’ll come back a year later and tell you how much IÂ’ve regretted it ;)
Thanks for the encouragement, I agree with everything you said.
I sort of feel guilty for posting an earlier thread similar to this!
Have you checked out my women responses yahoo.com thread??
You spend time on maintenance which means you care about yourself and the way you look. Women will this as a positive if anything but I understand what you mean. Shorthair is less time consuming yes BUT the important question is will you be happier with longhair...
People judge you after initially seeing your longhair. Have you read my post within my thread about conformity? if you want a superficial conforming woman then cut your hair just to please them. If you want a long lasting relationship then make sure your woman loves you for 'WHO' you are not 'WHAT' you are.
So far my mobile phone has been silent for a while.... but I'm still considering getting my haircut.. just giving it sometime to think about it I guess....
Do whatever you need to do to feel good about yourself.
Peace
As I said in the original post, I canÂ’t blame a girl for not being sexually attracted to me because of my long hair. Girls might like me for WHO I am, but most of the times they just arenÂ’t attracted to WHAT I am.
"Most girls dont like long hair, ime not getting enough so ime gonna cut my hair so all the girls will love me".
This is called " Selling Out"
If your just growing your hair to attract chicks then you are probably not gonna stick with it for more than a few years.
Seriously if the 1 single reason you grew hair was to get girls and your reading this you might aswell shave your head now, becasue guess what! 85+% of Women and apparantly gay men think long hair is repulsive and disgusting on a man, News flash mate.
I personally don't care what women think of the way i look with long hair even if it means ile be single for the rest of my life, if i find a woman that dosent just "accept that its what i am" but actually likes what i am for having long hair then it will be a happy day indeed.
Even if i go bald ime gonna keep the sides long and grow a beard as long as possible. Maybe this says somthing about the kind of person that i am..
Selling out? ... You’re talking about having long hair as if it’s some sort of a cult. It’s just a hairstyle – a way to look. And you’re right, what you said really does say something about the kind of person that you are – I don’t want to offend you or anything, but you really do sound like a narcissist. Sorry, but I guess I’d rather choose a woman over my own reflection.
chin length is fine, but buzzcuts and military styles will give the impression that you've decided to "join" the mainstream.
Actually I was thinking something like Dave Grohl on this picture: http://harpmagazine.com/img/articles/200510_099.jpg
Most girls into heavy metal arenÂ’t attractive to me at all. TheyÂ’re usually the gothic girls with tons of masscara, all black clothing and piercings. ThatÂ’s why I was so surprised when I thought I found an attractive girl who is into metal. To tell you the truth, I donÂ’t even listen to metal all that much any more, so I donÂ’t hang out with metal girls. But anyways happy New Year to you too!
Good luck.
Thanks, man!
To be honest I've got so used to having longhair and I find it low maintenance and I suppose it's part of me and in the past or now considered cutting it. Okay longhair is not for everyone to to have it all their lives and it's a personal choice. There are many people here who have great heads of longhair and would not consider cutting it.
As always the best advice is to think about the 2-week rule and if you still don't want you hair that long then think about getting it cut shorter in stages just in case you change your mind.
I know that having longhair can be associated with certain types of music like rock and metal and as you highlighted you friend was growin their hair out and you liked heavy metal music. Just as a matter of interest what band do you play in/link and listen to any material the band has created.
Look at the positive side, that of having a lady that does appreciate you with longhair and it's not a barrier or a turn off.
There is nothing wrong with seeking advice and you will certainly get that in this.
Cheers,
2 weeks are way past, IÂ’ve been thinking about cutting it for a couple of months now. IÂ’m more than certain. My band doesnÂ’t have any recordings yet but IÂ’ll sure post some when IÂ’m coming back in 2009 :)
they don't like you even with the short hair? BTDT
What if a single girl in the world doesnÂ’t like me with short hair? Well IÂ’m not THAT ugly! :)
AzureNight
Agreed, I'm cutting my hair soon for the same reasons. The maintenance is just ridiculous. An hour a day; 360 hours a year times 4.5 years is like 67.5 days wasted washing, combing, drying my hair. Plus I'm starting Brazilian Jiu Jitsu, and I already do Thai boxing, and it's too annoying.
I like long hair but it's an arbitrary, time wasting purely aesthetic thing. Character comes from within, not from the hair one has like some people on this site would have you think.
So do what you think is best. But don't force yourself to keep long hair if you're truly dissatisfied with it.
Yeah, long hair and sports don't mix that well :(
Anyways, thanks for all the responses guys! See y'all in a year!