new thread
Hi All,
I've lurked here forever - and even posted briefly about a year ago.
It's a really great board and a terrific community.
A quick background before the questions:
I grew up in an extremely religious environment and was not allowed to have long hair, even though I had always wanted to. I finally escaped that situation after attending a fundamentalist college - and began to immediately grow my hair out.
That lasted about three years - and I was well past shoulder length (and looking a lot like Jesus!) when ...... male pattern baldness began. This was only my mid-20s.
Even though I was no longer religious at that point, I still saw it as a stupid irony - I'd always been taught that long hair on a man was sinful - and as soon as my hair got long, it started to fall out! F@!!!!
So - I cut it and have kept it short ever since.
Until now -
I'm now mid-30s, and have been using rogaine for ten years - and started propecia about 3 months ago. The rogaine kept my hair from falling out completely. (Dad & Grandfather are bald as cue balls). My hair is very thick on sides and back, thin in the front - and very, very thin on the crown. Basically a bald spot up top.
I stopped getting haircuts in January - and I'm now firmly in the shaggy stage, and absolutely love it.
When I wear a hat - my hair looks great! In fact I get a lot of compliments (while wearing the hat). However, when I take the hat off, people say please get a haircut.
This is primarily because the crown looks like one of those volcanic mountains with lush vegetation on the slope - and a sparse moonscape of dead trees on top.
Question 1: Is wearing a hat all the time bad for the scalp?
The only way the top of my head looks remotely presentable is to wash & blowdry every day. This makes the good hair on the sides and back dry and kind of coarse.
Question 2: This is bad, right? Is there a way to keep thin hair fuller on top without that shampoo / blowdry routine.
I'd REALLY hate to cut my hair short again - it's just starting to get close to the way I like it. However - I don't want a skullet - and I really can't afford a transplant anytime soon.
Sorry for the long-winded post - but thanks for any advice!
Hello ! Welcome to MLHH !
First, it's quite courageous to let your hair grow, considering your MBP. A lot of men, becoming bald, would have cut.
It's good that rogaine and propecia worked.
About question 1... In fact, I think that wearing a hat diminish the blood circulation in the scalp, which CAN weaken hair, after years (Imagine you wearing a hat permanently during years :)) But, scalp massage can help blood circulation.
Question 2. No necessarily bad ! It depends on your hair and your scalp. Just try to avoid hot blowdrying.
Good luck, keep it long.
Vivien
Thanks for the warm welcome!
Sounds like genetics is your enemy, not a case of divine retribution ;-)
I have the same scenario going on as you, thick on the sides and back, bald spot up top, although I have not tried hair loss remedies to see what would happen there.
That you say you love your hair as it is says a lot. I think it means you are happy with it and would be dismayed to part with it. After all, we are very attached to our hair.
There is something I can't pin down that makes others think that long hair is only for those guys who have all their hair. I haven't sufficiently put my thoughts together on this, but this perception or aversion to long hair with balding must depend on the striking mental coflict that it can create. That is, social expectations seem to dictate that a balding fellow either shave or cut very short his remaining hair. I don't know how this came about, because oftentimes, though one may not possess all the hair he once had, one can grow the remainder long and have it look pretty good. Maybe it's just one of those entrenched expectations for many, and on seeing an example of long hair with balding, they are cued by mental dissonance to implore you to get it cut. That one might perceive a thing looks bad, such as long hair with balding, is just that, a perception, because you really have to get to the root of what is perceived to be "pretty" versus distasteful, and the reasons behind this are more than I can conceive of. What is the balance in terms of "looks" that draws the line between handsome or beautiful and unattractive? Who knows. In fact, I don't really know why men have such an aversion to balding. It's actually caused by an overabundance of male hormones, the balder, the more virile -- after a fashion! Shouldn't the logic go thus?! Some bald guys can actually be very attractive. Yet men spend millions on hair loss remedies and worry needlessly about hair loss. Long story short, if you are happy with your hair, that's the important thing. Those who have a problem with it -- it's just that, THEIR problem, not yours.
Hat wearing is sometimes caused by balding, but balding is not caused by hat wearing. I don't think that wearing a hat is bad for the scalp, unless it is very tight and causing circulation problems.
Thinner hair on top is going to get greasy in that area quicker since there is less hair to soak up the natural oils from your scalp. Maybe rather than blow drying it, you might just wash and let it air dry, then brush or comb your hair for the same effect in terms of appearance, but less damaged from the blow drying and not coarse on the back and sides.
I don't think you ought to cut your hair; just enjoy what you have right now and see what happens as far as any future loss goes. If you like it, keep it. The longer it gets, the less you and others will notice the absence of hair up top and the more the length will be noticed. I have got a few picture of examples of long hair with balding should you want to see them.
And too, a picture posted by yourself might help garner some ideas for answers from us here for your questions.
Matt B.
I would suggest looking into a semi-permanent hair pieces the secures to the bald area. They have ones that can be kept in places for serveral weeks with out resetting and re water proof!
Hey Everyone,
Thanks for the kind welcome and the replies!
And in particular, thanks Matt for the really thorough consideration. I'd be interested in seeing the pix you mentioned.
"Hat wearing is sometimes caused by balding, but balding is not caused by hat wearing."
That is an absolutely fantastic quote ....
I'm going to attach some pix so you can see what I'm talking about. (Definitely better with the hat!)
However, one of the big questions I have is what to do when I'm not wearing a hat - which I can't do all the time.
The front has obviously receded, and is very thin. You can't really see the crown in these pix, but it is quite sparse. It's not a huge bald spot - but it is a bald spot nonetheless. It's not too noticeable when looking at my face- but it is definitely visible to Googe Earth.
I think the majority of thinning happened during a one-year period in my 20s. Thankfully, it hasn't really gone any further since I started rogaine over a decade ago. (At this point, pharmaceutical chemistry seems to have some impact on divine retribution!) Nevertheless, the damage was done.
I'll try the air dry suggestion to keep the top fuller. (Is it just heated blowdry that causes damage?)
Anyway - thanks again everyone for the kind responses, and especially for the encouragement! I really like the friendly nature of this board.
I hope to keep the hair growing this time ....
Here is the first example:
Carl Johan Grimmark of the metal band Narnia of Sweden.
Example two:
Devin Townsend...
Example three:
Carlos Nunez, a Celtic folk musician from Galicia.
Wm. Shakespeare!
A long-haired Andorian!
The world bartending champion...from Argentina, Christian something.
Thanks for the pics, Matt -
I especially like the bartender's style.
If my hair could get long enough in the front, maybe it could pull back over the top like this guy.
You mentioned you have scalp issues similar to mine -
How have you dealt with it? (In terms of how you wear your hair and care for it?)
Thanks again for all the info - it's very helpful -
I don't do anything extraordinary. Just wash, condition, and comb, allow to air dry, sometimes some gel or leave-in conditioner. I do absolutely nothing to conceal the bald spot on top. I comb my hair and style it as if I had it all. It is what it is -- I am over it. I have moved past it and just focused on growing the hair I have. That is really the only thing I know to do short of snake oil and hair transplants, which I am not at leisure to look into or do I actually want them.
MB
The picture sans hat doesn't look bad to me, although I can see it is taken from a low angle, so it may look worse from above. I have the solution!!! - walk everywhere on stilts, then every one will have to look at you from below! Just kidding.
But seriously, it doesn't look any worse than my hair, and I am far from bald. I guess the difference is that you need rogaine to maintain it.
Also, I can't see from that angle how bad your bald spot is.
Most men do have receding hair at the temples and thin hair at the crown. It's just that there's a rule of thumb that if this is highly visible before you are 30 it will end up as full blown MPB, and obviously you did have those signs. It looks like you may have arrested the problem at much the stage that most guys would experience at 40+, except that we wouldn't expect further changes even without rogaine, plus I suppose you are in your 30s still.
I knew one guy who had a huge bald patch at the crown, but had longer than waist length hair and always tied it in a ponytail that sort of covered his bald patch if you didn't look to hard. I don't know if that will work if most of the hair on top is only there because of rogaine, as I don't think that part of your hair will grow long, but you probably can figure that out better than I can.
FWIW, I think shorter hair shows up thin or missing patches worse than long hair does. I believe that this is more important than worrying about cognitive dissonance (other people being thrown off balance by baldness and long hair that they don't think belong together). Plus, you aren't bald, the rogaine is working.