new thread
Hey guys,
I just figured that I would share my couple recent experiences, and if others want to share any negative comments they get, feel free too.. =]
First off, I rarely ever get negative comments on my hair. I'm 17 years old and I'd say my front bangs are about 4.5 - 5 inches below my chin, the back of my hair falls a very little bit above my shoulder blades I guess?
Anyways, both of these are similar, and not even all that offensive, because it lets me know that my hair is actually long.
Well, I work in a grocery store bakery (so my hair is back in a tail with a hat on), and a woman wanted to know if she could have a few sample cookies for her kids, so of course and went and grabbed some for the little buggers, and as I am walking to get them, the little girl screams out "He looks like a girl!". The mother replied with "No he doesn't", but I just ignored the whole thing anyway, just to not make it weird.. haha.
The second one kind of ticked me off. Today, my dad and I went to a few car dealerships to try and find a vehicle for me, and as we step out of the truck to walk the lot, a random driver on the highway next to us STOPS his car, rolls down his window, and yells "You look like a f***ing girl!", and speeds away.
Again, not really a big deal, I just wanted to share.. :P. This is only my second post, my last one being a 15 month update back in September, so I'm due for another one now in my 21st month..
Hi DJ,
Actually I would almost find that "looks like a girl" comment as a compliment and I know those kids at the market didn't intend to be mean.On the other hand that driver who went out of his way to stop his car just to inform you of the fact that "you look like a girl",minus the bad word,would kind of irk me.But in the end you just take those comments in stride and be proud of your hair:)I'll be looking forward to your next update.Cheers my friend
Mark
Hey Mark,
Yeah like I said, I kind of enjoyed the little kid one, just because it made me realize that my hair is actually long.. =]. But the other guy, I couldn't even believe it.. From what I could see he was a typical little conformist, and figured it would be worth it to insult me. Oh well, no biggie.
I should be doing an update either sometime this month or next month. It depends on when I find the digital camera, haha.
DJ
Some people are just oversensitive. There thin in the skin and let one little thing ruin there whole day. You had the right attitude and reaction towards it. Keep it growin!
The encouraging thing to me in this incident is that the mom corrected the little one. Kids will often say whatever pops into their heads, but at least the mom is attempting to demonstrate a good attitude.
As for the second incident, there's not much you can do about random idiots but let their stupidity 'roll off your back'.
I suppose you could look at it as a good thing that she corrected the little girl, but in all honesty, her voice was not convincing at all. I assume the ony reason she said it is because she thought I heard (which I did, but ignored it), and she was trying to be as respectful as possible.
Now about that other guy, I agree completely. Just need to let their stupidity 'roll of my back'.. =]
DJ
Yeah, I agree that's the best thing to do. I've gotten all sorts of negative comments/weird looks over the years. Mostly not about my hair I'm sure, but I never do anything other than ignore it. It just isn't worth my time and effort to try and defend myself to those who would ultimately be too ignorant to take anything I'd say into consideration in the first place.
I think a lot of us have had the little kid comments lol. They're just children and associate long hair = girls. I would see it as cute rather than bad.
As far as the other guy goes, I must admit I was surprised when I saw you said he actually felt the need to stop on a highway to express his opinion. Basically he sounds like either some backwoods yokel redneck or a meathead who isn't worth your time or anyone's for that matter. I'm sure you really don't even care about his comments as you shouldn't. Thanks for sharing, I'm still baffled over the fact that this d-bag decided to completely stop his car to be a d-bag lol.
keep it growin man, you know these people are trolls.
-Phil
Hey Phil,
Yeah the little girl one wasn't so bad, I just wish it were easier for a parent to teach a kid that long hair doesn't = girl.. :P
For the other dude, believe me, I was shocked.. haha. I was like, "there is no way that guy just STOPPED on the highway to yell an insult at me..". But hey, with both of these incidents, I was reminded that I have long hair and I'm proud of it.
Whoa, off-topic, but I just recently had a dream that I had short hair, and I woke up so relieved.. so my long hair has got to stay.. haha
DJ
Maybe he was just short of his daily d-bag quota and decided to make one last desperation stop to try and finish the job lol
You did the best thing by ignoring. At the length your hair is at now, comments such as these should be a thing of the past in most likely 6 more months. Besides, you have no reason to have to defend yourself about how you personally desire your hair to be.
Both the stories are funny in different ways actually.
When I had much longer hair and facial hair I would notice that the really young children, those being carried or in strollers would just stare at me for a long time, much more than at any other random person. I was watching some tv show about how children learn the other day and it said that children and babies will stare longer at something that is novel or defies previous experience. Apparently facial hair and long hair do confuse the very young. What happens after that is largely up to the parents raising them. Kudos to the mother in your story for correcting the kid.
As for the second story, I am also amazed that somebody would be so riled by your hair that they had to stop to tell you off. That strikes me as very funny, how insecure would you have to be to do something like that LOL! The way I figure it is that an insult from someone like that is really a compliment to you.
Glad your not bothered by the comments, I suppose narrow minded people still feel there is "hope" for you yet if they can shame you into changing your mind.
I would have got into a car and ran after the guy and beat him with a cat o' nine tails hahaha.
Actually, It's better if you laugh it off.
Once, I was with my friends who all have long hair (we're in a death metal band) and these group of preps came up. One of them said, "uh huh huh that guy looks like a girl uh huh huh". In the liquor store where my friend was buying alcohol, they exclaimed, "that kid outside looks like a girl but you don't, you have a beard huh huh".
Again. Some people are just STUPID and they take pride insulting what they see as threatening to their normal world.
So in the end, who cares.
The comment from the little kid I see as cute, but the second one is flat out offensive and ignorant. The fact that he saw the need to actually bring his car to a complete stop just to say it is pathetic. I'd say he's either so closed minded that he sees anything that falls outside the norm as wrong or offensive, or perhaps he is even insecure and secretly envies you for being able to break that norm.
I've found that a lot of people generally view anything that falls outside the norm as weird or wrong. People often fear what they cannot understand, or rather, choose not to understand. Not just long hair on men either, but anything and everything not perceived as normal. Long hair on men is just as natural as long hair on women. If it wasn't, men wouldn't be able to naturally grow long hair in the first place.
I guess I'm in the minority, seeing that I am fascinated by all the differences amongst humanity. It's a great big world, with all sorts of different people. Just think how dull our world would be if everyone was exactly the same and absolutely no one broke the norm in any ways.
Just think how dull our world would be if everyone was exactly the same and absolutely no one broke the norm in any ways.
True. I guess some people just like things dull. Can't blame them too much, I guess.
I've gotten a few disparaging comments, but VERY few--they're definitely outnumbered by the positive comments. I occasionally get people purporting to be helpful--occasionally they try to appeal to youth ("You'd look so much younger with short hair!"), which I absolutely do not get.
Hi DJ
Kids will be kids and the mom did the right thing. I don't get that much from kids, but I sometimes get, "your hair is long!" or something similar. I always talk to 'em for a minute so they will have a positive first impression of us "longhairs".
As for that jerk in the car, well that's the reason I carry around a big rock.
Nah, just kidding!
Do you live in the south?
Paul
Hey Paul,
I guess the "look like a girl" comments would be more scarce if I could grow a beard. Unfortuneately, I can't grow any facial hair, which is total BS since my brother has had a beard since he was 14.. haha.
And no, I live in Pennsylvania.. :P.
DJ