new thread
I'm 57 and have usually dated younger- or young looking- guys. Several months ago I made a connection with someone 10 years older, and at this point we are serious about staying together and building a relationship.
My hair is shoulder length and I intend to grow it longer like it used to be. 'John' loves long hair on women.
To me, a long haired older guy has a worldly look about him- maybe he's a retired professor or musician. I asked John if he'd grow a ponytail for me, and surprisingly he agreed- although he's never had his hair long before.
It's only been about 3 weeks, and he's already starting to ask what to do about his hair blowing up from behind. He has plenty of baseball caps that look great on him, so it sounds like it's more of an excuse.
Then he started asking me if I should trim around his ears, or something. Well ... no, not if you're trying to grow your hair longer. I'm still struggling with my own awkward period!
He looks a bit like a duffer with his silky hair cut short. He wants to please me, but he's apparently already tired of the awkward period. Geez! It's taken me about 3 years to get mine shoulder length, and he's already asking me how he can make a ponytail.
Are there any older guys out there who can encourage me (or him) in this process? Can anyone direct me to photos of sexy, older men with ponytails? Maybe I can stick one on the bathroom mirror to encourage him.
Thanks for any advice!
Glad "John" is joining the longhair ranks...
Both of you should check in with this forum on a regular basis for lots of advise and encouragement. Take a trip through the Users Directory and you will find several "older gentlemen" (ahem! myself being one of them....) with wonderful examples of long hair.
I look forward to following "John's" progress.
Thanks for Sharing your story.
WWT (Walter White Tail)
Thanks for directing me to the User's Directory. I saw that you reside in the SW. I've been in Santa Fe since 1986 and love it!
Hi IrishEyesQq,
First of all, I would like to welcome you to the hyperboard! It is cool that you appreciate long hair on men, and I wish you the best of luck in persuading your significant other in his own hair groing journey. I know that the "awkward stage" can be frustrating for those growing their hair long for the first time, and things will become much easier if your BF can hang in there and grow his hair long enough to tie it in a ponytail. (In the meantime, a baseball cap works very well) Hopefully, some of the other members here can chip in and offer their advice too.
May I also suggest that you join "The Long Hair Community"? (The link to that site can be found in the "links" section at the top of the page) That is a great community, of both men and women members, and I know that you can get some excellent advice there too.
Best of luck to you!
David
Thanks for the welcome and advice. I'll check out the other links, too.
Styling gel can be your friend during the awkward stage. You can force your hair where you want it until it's long enough for gravity to take over.
Tell your significant other that gravity will only take over if his hair is allowed to grow without trimming. Besides, you can wind up with a mullet if you trim.
Hi Ms. IrishEyes,
I can't claim to fall under the category of "sexy"; but, I can at least claim to be one of the "older" members here (LOL)....
If you click on my avatar pic in the upper left corner, that should take you to my silly hair website (as well as other pages on other topics). I have plenty of pics of my long hair there, --- actually, since those pics were all taken in the spring of '04, my hair is actually considerably longer now. But, at least you'll have something to look at and laugh about!
My best to you and your significant other, --- may you grow long and prosper together for many MANY years!!
- Ken in San Francisco
Welcome to the Hyperboard IrishEyes!
I've grown out my hair 3 times. Once in high school, again after 4 years in the army and finally after a mullet. The only thing that really bothered me was the "bangs in the eyes" stage.
I think John just isn't used to the feel of hair on his neck. The fact that he so readily agreed might mean that he has considered growing it already. He may have just needed you as an excuse to try it out.
You might get you girl friends to compliment him on it. Guys love compliments from females.
Paul
The only thing that really bothered me was the "bangs in the eyes" stage.
Hi, Paul,
Growing bangs out is a tough one. I did it a couple of times and it's a pain trying to keep them out of your face. I finally gave in and have had bangs for most of my life now.
Funny you should mention the 'feel of hair on his neck'. It's only about 1/4 inch long and he's already complained about that! I guess it's something that most women haven't ever experienced. The worst I remember is the feeling of 'nakedness' after being forced to get my hair cut short as a kid. lol.
Welcome to the hyperboard Irisheyes. First of all, if John is having trouble with "strays", he could use hair gel/styling gel to help hold them in place. Paul has found success using it, and I have used it before also when I first started growing out my bangs.
As far as the pics go, there are a number of "older" men on her that has absolutely gorgeous long hair: Urban Cowboy, and Whitetail are just a couple that have such hair.
(I apologize to anyone I did not list. I find everyone's hair to be gorgeous. And I also apologize to anyone I have offended by referring to them as older.)
You should also get John to check out the hyperboard. He will find a lot of good advice and support.
~Angel
Hi Angel,
Actually, I'm not really all that old. I'm 23. I just look like hell for that age, that's all.
All kidding aside, many thanks for the nice compliment!
- Ken
(who is in his late, VERY late, unbelievably EXTREMELY LATE 20s!)
Welcome IrishEyes, I hope you will succeed in convincing John to stick it out. I didn't mind the awkward stage at all, in fact I loved the way it got in my eyes and felt on my neck. To me it just reminded me that I was progressing to my goal.
For John, I think all I can suggest is that he should wear shirts with collars. Most of his hair should ride up and over the collar thereby reducing that tickling feel on his neck.
Good luck
Bruce
I see no one has taken you up on this yet. So here goes...
Sexy enough?
Long enough?
As an older man (54) with a ponytail for the last 15 years I hope you have great success in persuadinhg your SO and in growing your own hair as well.
Get long together, and tell him the awkward stage doesn't last for more than a few months!
Thanks, everyone, for such a warm welcome! There are, indeed, some very good looking longhairs out there. Thanks for including your pics!
John is still hanging in there and hasn't put a scissor to his hair. It looks really nice already and it's only about 1/4 to 1/2 inch long. His hair seems to grow pretty fast and will probably wind up passing mine in length. lol.
I told him that I had written into this site and I was surprised at how open-minded he was about that. He wants me to send him the link, so hopefully he'll write in.
If he does, I'm counting on you guys to keep up the encouragement!
Glad to hear things are going well. I, too, can recommend the Long Hair Community, every bit as welcoming and supportive as MLHH.
If you want to see an example of what a real oldie like me with very little material to work with has managed to achieve, have a look at this.
I don't think LHC is anywhere near as supportive for longhaired men as MLHH. They allow women to post very inflammatory and derogatory comments against long hair on men. It is really not that inclusive of a community.
That's not been my experience: although not every LHC member likes long hair on men, almost all seem to respect the wishes of the 10% minority of males on that board, and I think there would be a lot of support for a couple both growing together. I've certainly had nothing but suportive comments, but then I have a lot less hair than you (and yes, I am jealous!)!
The OP and her SO have both opinions to consider and will no doubt make their own decision.
I agree that the majority of posters are supportive of men who choose to grow out their hair. Still, the site allows others, such as a recent poster, to call it effeminate, shameful and to list the Corinthians verse. Such a comment would never be allowed at MLHH.
I didn't see that post, but it's definitely a minority view over there. I can remember the Corinthians verse being discussed at length several times on MLHH in the old days.