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I wear my hair down all the time, and it does get a little wild looking at times, but for some reason I feel self concious if I put a band in it for a pony tail, I've occasionally done it in public but not usually if people I know are around.
When I was growing it out I had a bad hair day and I wore a pony tail one day around coworkers and some made fun of me, and I should have just ignored that and worn it again the next day, but for some reason I took it hard I guess (I was a bit self concious going in that day so the joking really drove it home)
since then I just go natural, although there are many times I think I would look less unkempt if I had it in a pony tail
anyone else ever feel this way?
I hate to wear it in a ponytail because it feels too controlled and like I'm hiding my hair.
I felt that way the first time I wore a ponytail, but nobody said anything so it was a quick adjustment. The fact that you got harassed about your image makes things more difficult. I can't advise you based on personal experience, but I do urge you not to let others dictate your own self image. In the end, the only person you have to worry about caring how you look is yourself.
I think that having long hair over time does make a person less self-conscious with it. Most people after a while will accept your new appearance and in time few would remember what you looked like short haired. Tying it back in a tail can help you forget that it's not there as the hair isn't getting in your face and is neatly tied back. I personally feel that having the hair tied back appears more masculine then loose. Also tied back is an excellent way to keep it neat if you do have one of those "bad hair days" if you have hair that is frizzy or puffs up. Don't sweat on it too much.
Duncan
Hey lonewolf,
I used to worry about that stuff too, but got over it pretty quick. I just dealt with the comments by quickly dismissing them and moving on. It's pretty easy to do actually. If I were to braid my hair, I think I would feel apprehensive again...but it all comes down to how YOU feel about yourself. If you like it, others will accept it...so just do it. It's really that simple and easy!
Hope that helps!
Take care and keep it growin'!
Brett
For me it's somewhat of the opposite. If I'm at work, I feel odd if I don't have it tied back or braided, even though I've worn it loose or in a "quasi-half-tail" using a clip a few times, and nobody has said anything.
Frodo
It is a big step to grom from having hair which is long to any kind of tying back, and usually the first thing it is possible to do is a ponytail.
Yes, I certainly felt a bit self conscious when I first wore a ponytail in public. I think the secret is to think of a ponytail as being the mark of a "real longhair" and enjoy the notoriety. The teasing and comments will soon disappear as coworkers get used to it.
I once had these feelings at work, too. However, now it has become just the opposite. No one says a word unless I wear my hair down. The tail has been great, and apparently viewed as "professional." I wear a tie, so the look is kind of cool, if I may be so bold.
An important trick is that you MUST clean up the loose hairs on your neck when you wear the tail. I have a nice electric trimmer for this which boxes the ends off nicely, and sometimes I put the clipper on the long setting and give myself a modified undercut.
Try it, man! Check out this example
thanks for all your comments, very helpful to read... honestly reading these gave me a bit more of a confidence either way, thanks
I'm with Frodo, I feel more comfortable with it in a tail when I'm at work.
I will wear my hair in a ponytail or a braid anywhere except at work.
This is really because of a chance remark I heard, and what happened afterwards. The circumstances are difficult to explain without confusing people. I am a patent agent, but I used to be a patent searcher. In that job I worked at one time in a library but I wasn't an employee of the library, or any kind of contractor, or anything to do with them atall. In short, my job was searching the records, and that is just where they happened to be.
There was this guy I knew who was a librarian and always wore a ponytail, and his boss told him within earshot of me that if he was going to do that he might as well cut it off, and he subsequently did! You have to understand that his boss was not my boss, or even anything remotely to do with the company I worked for. There was no connection between us atall.
Nevertheless, I decided not to give any boss the excuse to say that if I always tied it back then I might as well cut it off. Ponytails were rather rare on guys at that time, and seen as far more avant garde (and more feminine!) than simply having loose long hair.
This is not long after Sly Stallone (Rambo!) wore a ponytail, and believe me before that guys never wore them. Of course, I expect someone will point out that Karl Lagerfeld, the gay fashion designer, wore one before that, but that actually stopped most straight guys from wanting to wear a ponytail! Ironically, Stallone cut his hair shortly thereafter.
half the fun of the tail is the way it feels, very comfortable.
and im sure others have told you before, but don't let what others think of your hair keep you down. be proud of the fact that you've grown your tail back and you actually get to experience what its like when most people are too scared to try it even once in their life
No, exactly the opposite is true for me. On days I feel really good, I wear them lose. Everytime my self-consciousness is a little weaker I go ponytail as with that I have the feeling of looking perfectly decent. I know it's just a feeling, and it might look kind of wild, too, but the feeling is what matters to me.
Some kind of in-between is wearing a lose ponytail, which then looks like kind of "half open" hair. Especially when having freshly washed hair, I prefer that style. Feels good, looks good in my opinion.