new thread
Well, I've been doing a lot of reading and searching today, using the Internet to find out useful product information and the importance of long hair etc etc. One thing I did come across was quite shocking, to say the least.
I came across a question and answer based website, where users can post questions and people answer back, and the question at hand was, ''Do you like long hair on men?''
Right, so that's the basic run of things. I scrolled down the numerous answers, and most people replied with either a blatant ''NO'', or ''I think long hair past the chin is greasy looking and is a no-go''. There were some good answers though, it wasn't entirely one sided, yet the one that stunned me the most was the following:
''My husband had long hair, and until he cut it I didn't give him the time of day''.
Apologies for the large post, what's everyone else's views on this matter? I think it just goes to show the lack of education and ignorance of the vast majority of the population nowadays towards long hair.
Thanks for taking the time to read :)
Kind Regards, James
I think we do need to pay heed to the "greasy" comment. After all, the modern era of long hair came out of the hippie movement of the 60s and a lot of that hair was unkempt and indeed greasy.
Guys, that's what we inherited (although I was there and on front lines then, although not a hippie myself, just enjoying my long hair on their coattails), and we need to certainly make sure we are neat and clean.
Oddly, I think I act better toward others partly to make sure I do not let them generalize an ill feeling toward all longhairs!
I went to lunch the other day at a fairly high end deli. this deli has the corporate types, rich retires, people who wear suits everyday. as soon as i got thru the door alot these folks were giving me the hairy eyeball(shitty looks)i keep clean clothes hair. i was wearing clean shorts hair segmented down my back and 00 earplugs , i have giant dragon tattoo down my calf. i was so uncomfortable , i felt so uncomfortable i just walked out.i even had a confrontation with some guy who made a comment i wont repeat. i told him to back off. these kind of people would call the cops and really mess up my day, even if i didn't do anything its my word against all these yuppies. but i admit i definitely need some anger management classes. as i was leaving i did say i hate all of you people, i probably shouldn't have said anything.live and learn.thanks for listening James/Tampa,Fl
Never2Long,
I agree with you 100%. Afterall, who wants to look dirty and greasy? We are human beings with dignity. If we want respect and acceptance as longhairs then our speech, grooming, and bearing must command respect. It will only go to show that those who would attack us because of our long hair are the little and shallow ones.
When someone throws a slur at me like "Get a haircut." I would like to respond by saying "Why do you feel you have to say that?". It's very disarming and it turns it right back at them.
Do to others as you would have them do to you.
Raymond
Excellent response, Raymond! People often just repeat things they have heard (i.e. "get a haircut") without actually *thinking* about why they are saying those things. Good for you for not returning hate for hate, ignorance for ignorance ~ but turning it into a teachable moment, and maintaining a level of respect and dignity. You da man!!!!
This actually really reminds me of the concept of "Body policing" that's thrown around in social justice circles, anyone who steps out of line with cultural beauty norms (or just cultural norms) is treated as if their body is public property. Yeah
Hello,
I had noticed the same thing at some point, here is my (personal) opinion on that:
- I would say that the younger women (let's say for argument sake the less than 30 yrs old) would tend to be less attracted to "men with long hair", and they will be (I believe) the majority to use the internet to reply to these polls. They might be more picky, or more into stereotypes conveyed by "stars" and "male icons" (whose immense majority has short hair).
- The ultimate truth is: it depends on what's under the long hair. I am sure that if the poll started with a picture of a beautiful male model with long hair, and then an average looking guy with a buzz cut, then half the girls would simply say - "I would normally hate long hair but I really like this guy though".
So not necessarily a lack of education, but rather lack of thoughtfulness on the topic. My 2 cents anyway...
Apart from that, I remembered I read once that some scientists asked people to rate a variety of faces, and it is interesting to know that a face that was entirely created by mixing hundred of pictures of people (using a computer) was often considered as the most beautiful... The "average" face.
I am wondering if people don't behave the same way towards long hair subconsciously (i.e. less long hair, so less familiarity, less beautiful?).
Back in the heyday of the Hippie. I and my friends sported long hair, which we kept clean. The assumption that hippies were dirty is blatantly wrong. Sure we could get dirty, but so did a lot of folks and baths/showers were not unknown. The dirty hippie look was what the media focused on and a stereotype was created. As for the feeling the public at large holds about long haired males. It is the product of generations of social indoctrination. The societal "norm" is for men to have short hair. Any deviaton from this is suspect and a sign of "other", as in not of our tribe, therefore such persons must be feared, shunned. and made inconsequential. As much as "we" palaver about individual freedom. To attempt individuality brings a host of social "tsk"ing. Humans are uncomfortable with change. Feelings about long hair on males is a part of that mindset.
I think long hair is coming back in style. Unfortunately celebrities dictate the style of everyone, and several of them are now wearing longer, less formal hairstyles.
I hope that it doesn't become hugely popular because part of the reason i'm growing mine out is to do something different for once.
Interesting that you should mention the above. I had been planing later this Summer doing a video along this line to include wifes and gf's of guys. It will NOT cast a woman such as this in a very "loving" light, in fact, all of the women who have subscribed to my channel may very well unsubscribe after I get through with this subject. I will tell it "like it is" and there is NO REASON the man should be bossed-around like this by some WITCH ON WHEELS! And I could care-less what they think! It is HIGH time guys that you STOP allowing this ABUSE!!!!! And, it is HIGH TIME she should shut her bitchy nagging mouth!
Justin~
ps: Emails I receive about this subject are all the time and asking me "what should I do, I don't want to cut my hair." It is quite apparent: she DOESN'T LOVE HIM!!!!!!!
I wouldn't have the slightest idea what to do with a wife who had that attitude. My wife, Pam doesn't particularly love really long hair, but was really attentive to the idea that I really WANTED to wear it that way for me as a man. As my own individual person. When she thought of it in those terms, she told me it didn't matter what her own preferences were: that it was my hair and it was my business what I did with it. No matter what style she would prefer on me, she would be against it if it was something different than what I felt was right for me as an individual. I feel the same way about what she does with her own hair, as well. Ultimately, it's up to her. I really don't see why couples would choose to look at it in any other way. Just sayin'!
Hmmmmm,this could be a blessing in disguise for some married guys as a way to achieve some peace and quiet at home.Just grow your hair long and that old battleaxe will zip her lip!LOL.Perhaps another reason to support a guys reason to grow his hair out:)Cheers
Mark
It's kinda funny, I think my girlfriend would probably cry for weeks if I decided to get mine cut.
To me, it's a case of love me, love my hair.
If someone wants to start changing things about you, it's a sign that they're more interested in "what you could be" than who you are, and that sets off alarm bells with me. If I'm not good enough as I am, then I will never be good enough.
Saying that, I'm willing to compromise on some things in a relationship; you have to be otherwise it's doomed to fail and you're as bad as the person who wants to change you because you're refusing to accommodate your partner's likes and dislikes. However, the point is that some things are up for negotiation, but others are not.
The old chestnut, "If you really loved me you'd..." tends to be met by "If you really loved me, you wouldn't ask."
Regarding your main question, the subject of general views towards men with long hair, my response is, "so what?" I'm not growing my hair for societal approval, I'm growing it because that's what I want to do.
As for the secondary point about the husband/wife thing, if my wife ever displayed an attitude like that, she'd be hearing from my attorney shortly thereafter. When you marry, you should accept that person for who and what he or she is, not what you want them to become. That kind of manipulative, controlling behavior is completely inexcusable.
On the flip side of some of this, one of the other responders said something to the effect that he'd be upset if a large percentage of men grew longer hair he'd be upset, because he grew his out to be "different". My opinion is, if you're growing your hair to be 'different', you're growing it for the wrong reasons, just the same as wearing certain clothes, or tattoos, or whatever, to be 'different'. Face it, you're unique... just like everyone else. There's only so many ways for a human being to look, and no matter what you do with your appearance, somebody else somewhere is doing the same thing, and then just how 'different' are you? Don't count on your appearance to make you unique, be unique. The only thing that truly separates you from the "next guy" is who you are inside. Your outer appearance is just that... an appearance.
Frodo
Don't count on your appearance to make you unique, be unique. The only thing that truly separates you from the "next guy" is who you are inside. Your outer appearance is just that... an appearance.
Couldn't agree more on the above statement Frodo. Wise words indeed.
Duncan
I guess I am one of the lucky lads. My girlfriend loves long hair on guys. I think I wouldn't give anyone the time of day if they couldn't at least try to open their mind to the prospect of long hair on a guy. I mean, after all, it's only hair man. If they couldn't get past that, then the they must be one shallow person.
Neil.
Well, not to be rude, but who cares what other people answering this survey think? The keyword 'other people' right there. If you grow your hair, why should you care what others think? At this point in time, some people still can't accept long hair on men. Those people are ignorant, and are not worth giving a hoot about. Those who see you for you are the people you should care about. That's what's great about long hair: it filters out ignorance. Most people I know ask me to get a haircut. I take the offer, consider it and go on with life. And personally I think long hair is much better and more natural, but if see a guy with a buzzcut walk in front of me, I'm not exactly going to yell at him to grow his hair out. In the great words of The Beatles: Let it be.
PEACE!
Corvus.
This statement is indicative of passive-agressive and manipulative behavior, which is not conducive to a healthy relationship -- regardless of whether it is about hair or something else entirely.