new thread
Hi everyone! :-D
First and foremost I am what you might consider "Straight Edge" which means I do not smoke, drink or do drugs, but I don't go around trying to preach to others. this is just my lifestyle choice
second, I have been contemplating growing my hair long for some time because I just happen to like the way long hair looks.
when I mentioned this to my big Brother he made what I considered a somewhat ignorant statement in regards to guys with long hair.
first he said "Don't grow it long. keep it short!" and when I asked why he felt that way he replied with "because longhairs do drugs and you don't!"
anyway, I was very angry with him and told him how ignorant and bigoted he sounded.
I never thought doing drugs was a prerequisite for wanting longer hair!!
How do you guys feel about this and are there a significant number of straight edge guys who have grown their hair out?
Hi Sean and welcome along. You summed it up in the first line of your post "It's your lifestyle choice" If you want long hair - go for it! Good luck. Ian
I really do NOT hope my big Brother is correct.
I do not smoke, drink, or use drugs. anyone else here that is like that?
Sorry Sean, but I don't see the connection. There are long hairs, short hairs, no hairs etc in all walks of life, all religions, all life-styles, genders, sexual orientation etc etc. There should be no stereotypes. You are you, you have your own choices - It's up to you and what you want. Ian
Ian, I agree 100%!
Wasn't Longer hair on Men quite common during the Victorian era?
if so, I would be in favor of some sort of Neo-Victorian resurgence! ;-)
Hi Sean
Take a look in the history books and you will see a wealth of men with long hair. Men are suppose to have long hair, at least according to the laws of Mother Nature and NOT the laws of Man. (You can see where mans laws has gotten us with all the trouble we are in today.)
Hair is a natural part of being a Human Being for both Male and Female.
There is an old saying: "To argue with a fool makes two fools." No more asking opinions of your brother or anyone else. If you want long hair, just grow it.
All the best-
Justin~
I am very sXe, considering how ancient I am.
I am also very grUv.
Bill
Hi Justin,
I have to admit what you said certainly rings so true.If men were not supposed to be long haired then why does their hair grow long if not sheared artificially?Anyone who tries to discourage a guy from growing their hair long missed that lesson about minding their own business.It never ceases to amaze me how often this subject is brought up here as the answer just so obvious.Cheers my friend:)
Mark
The vast majority of people here are what you deem to be "First and foremost I am what you might consider "Straight Edge" which means I do not smoke, drink or do drugs, but I don't go around trying to preach to others. this is just my lifestyle choice".
Does that answer your question?
Be your own man, out with stereotypes! Sounds like you've made a good start already..
regards
Andy
First of all, I will say that I agree with the other responses that have been posted already, in that my opinion is if you want your hair long, it's nobody's business but yours.
In regard to the statements your brother made to you, I see them as being fairly typical.
To give you an example: I turned 60 years old in late August of this year. I have been growing my hair out for over three years for one reason and one reason only: I like it, just as you said you do. I do not smoke and I never have. I do not do drugs, again having never done it. I drink an occasional beer, but not to access. I say all this to make a point: My hair doesn't define who I am or what I do. I wear it the way I do simply because my wife and I both like it this way. Period.
Welcome to the board. I hope you enjoy your time here.
Steve
Hey Sean! I guess I would have to fit your definition of Straightedge. Not that I am against any of it necessarily, I just don't and not even sure why I don't LOL but none the less I have had my hair long for a long time and have done well enough. The most important part of it all is to be yourself and do what makes you and only you comfortable with yourself. So if you like your hair long and feel good about it and you, that's what's most important. The best of luck to you!
It's much easier to undertsand when you put it that way!
There are no prerequisites for having long hair, aside from the obvious of being able to still grow hair. Anyone who thinks that all longhairs do drugs or other stuff like that, is quite simply bigoted and ignorant. They probably see it as something different and deviant, and associate other things they think are deviant things with long hair (like doing drugs) for the simple fact that don't understand it and are afraid of it.
There are plenty of straight edge guys who grow their hair long. By your definition I'm definitely straight edge. I don't smoke or do drugs, and gave up on drinking a year ago after I finished university. It was one of the best ways to socialise at uni, and most of my friends would hang out at the bar on campus most of the time, so it was just something everyone did (please note, I live in Australia and the legal drinking age is 18. A bar on a university campus here is extremely common). But since I finished uni, I just don't drink anymore, it's lost its appeal.
But really, grow your hair out if you want. If you're straight edge for your own reasons, and you're completely happy with it, then you having nothing to worry about if you grow your hair out. The only people who might think that being longhaired automatically means you do smoke/drink/whatever will be short haired guys who are ignorant and afraid of anything different.
Excellent post w0nderfish. I agree wholeheartedly about the "deviant" and "fearing what you don't know" type thing. The fact is that our current society is conditioned against long hair by the media and corporations and people lash out against what they aren't comfortable with.
I didn't decide to grow mine to fit in with any sort of "crowd", I just got tired of shaving my head (always kept it short until I suddenly stopped cutting it a couple years ago), and also thought it'd be cool to get more in touch with my "natural self" as it were. It's annoying to deal with sometimes but overall I much prefer having it long. Oh, and I look forward to adding a big bushy beard when I'm older and my facial hair thickens up a bit more, harhar. ;D
Bias against guys with long hair goes a little deeper than just media/corporations, a lot of parents teach their kids that all boys have short hair and all girls have long hair. That's how a lot of kids tell the difference between men and women, and keep that mindset as they grow up. That's why they're so put off if a guy has long hair, or even if a woman cuts her hair short. They can't accept accept the idea that things are more complicated than the simple binary black/white stuff they're taught as kids.
Once my hair starts getting longer I'm definitely going to try experimenting with facial hair as well. It's a bit hard these days, I work in fast food and my boss always notices if I haven't shaved for a few days and reminds me that I need to look at bit more 'professional'. I can't find a new job quick enough.
Last night I was talking to some other person about contemplating growing my hair long and their response was:
"Dude, long hair for Men is dated. it's like So seventies"
I rolled my eyes and said to him with his shaved head
"And so is the shaved/bald look!"
Yup, I hear that one all the time ... mostly from older guys. It's not long hair that is so 70s, it's that their fashion sense is so 90s. Duh!
Tell them to wake up and look around at the coolest guys TODAY - in 2011.
Damon
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Greetings Sean! Well, I had to look up what "SXE" meant, but I'm pleased to report that I'm 22 years old, have never done drugs of any kind, am not on any medications, have never consumed alcohol, and have never smoked anything and I don't intend to change any of that. Do what you want and grow your hair as you wish. Mine is a few inches past my shoulders now and still getting longer every day (first time grower). I also got my share of "hippy", "druggy", "girl", "sissy" etc. comments at the start (just teasing from family members, still irritating though). It's pretty much died down at this point, and no stranger has EVER said a word about it.
Best wishes to you. :)
Heh! At your age, I was pretty clean...somewhere in my mid 20s I started indulging in sushi (a gateway drug if there ever was one) and got into drinking fine liquors (if you can't sip it, I ain't drinking it!)
Be that as it may, my hair was already long when I started drinking. Smoking (either) or drugs never appealed to me, regardless of the length of my hair.
Let's turn this around though...I'm sure there are far greater numbers of people with short hair that drink, smoke, and do drugs than there are long hairs. And even if it is true, what does it matter...you are clean, for yourself, not for others, just like you want to grow your hair long for yourself!
Well, I've been a "straight edge" for a very long time. I've never cared for drugs, smoking or booze and I first grew mine out when I was 21. I'm in my 50s now. People have always and will always characterize persons because of their appearance, though. Even today, Hollywood still likes to make the longhair a druggie or a biker or a baddie. Small Texas school districts still think they can force a homogenous society by banning long hair on boys.
Having been into long hair for so long, though, I've seen huge changes. I find basically no prejudice regarding hair in my own life these days. People generally are much more accepting than back in the '70s when I first wore mine long.
It's up to guys like us to keep shattering attempts at stereotyping. Wear your hair long, clean and neat and they can't peg you as "dirty" or "sloppy". Be a smart and productive person and nobody can call you a degenerate. I guess I've never liked being pigeonholed.
Sean- it's just a stereotype guys with long hair get...I always get the same from straight edge folks...On the other hand, the flip side of the coin,when you have long hair you automatically become cool...You can always say that to your brother, (At least I'll look cool) Just do what you want and grow it long...forget about negative comments!
I don't smoke, drink, or do drugs, but my husband would probably not consider me straight. People also did not consider me to be straight back when "straight" meant "non-hippie" instead of "non-gay". However, not all hippies do drugs. Many hippies are opposed to pollution of their environment, and your own body is as close to home as you can get.
It's your hair, man. This is an election with only one qualified voter. So long hair wins!
Worrying about Big Brother of any stripe is so 1984. Now truly "the whole world is watching" (and yeah that phrase is so 1968) but it's 2011 and everyone else besides you is also an open book. Because of that, nobody but the creepy care what others choose to look like.
The only things that you will do that he doesn't do is hair ties.
Bill
I love the pic there!
Well, I'm afraid I ain't no sXe! ;)
But even if I were I'd still give exactly the same reply to anyone stupid enough to try and stereotype me:
"It goes in one ear and right out the other"
Damon
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Welcome to the board. Your post grabbed my attention because it addresses many attributes of a social stigma that is rooted in nonsensical claptraps of conformist culture.
First off, your brother may very well be a nice guy, but his statement about long hair and drugs is terribly ignorant. Society usually likes to generalize about people when it's seems too difficult to actually do something called THINKING.
If you grow your hair long, you'll probably be judged to an extent. A great thing about this is that it makes it much easier to know who respects you for who YOU are and who will only respect you for what THEY think you should be. Trust me, long hair will make that whole process easier to see.
There is a certain dignity in not compromising basic physical features to make others "happy." It also frees up a lot of energy to compromise constructively about other things, like practicing acceptance about the world, and it cultivates a will to change it for the better.
I have not used any drugs in 3 years, and alcohol is a drug too, even though drinkers who point the finger at "longhair druggies" won't admit alcohol is a drug. It's an incredibly narrow and ignorant double standard.
So, grow your hair for you, and be happy.
Take care.
SS
Good post, couldn't have said it better!
regards
Andy
Well, ever since my heart attack, I've been doing more drugs than before, but they're all prescribed drugs.
Actually, I'm a normal, hard working citizen who happens to have long hair. My grand kids probably would recognize me without it. "I don't smoke, drink, or chew, and I don't go with the girls that do."
I think that guys with long hair are far more likely to be ones that think for themselves and don't follow the herd. In the rest of society, most people drink, many smoke (although less all the time), but not so many use illegal drugs. The paradox is that people who think for themselves tend not to smoke and drink just because their peers do, but on the other hand they also tend not to think that something is dangerous just because the government tells them so.
The real difference between longhairs and sheeple, is that sheeple let other people think for them. Not all shorthairs are sheeple, though, they are just way more likely to be!
So, if you throw aside conventional wisdom and look at the facts instead, what you find, for example, is that marijuana is much less dangerous than tobacco, and in fact not even as dangerous as alcohol. OTOH, the risk posed by law enforcement is another factor that can't be ignored.
Whether to smoke marijuana in joints that include tobacco involves another risk analysis, but the amount of tobacco is much less than consumed by people who smoke cigarettes. This is because a light smoker is considered to be someone who smokes 20 cigarettes a day, but more than three joints a day would be really heavy use, IMHO (and would mean you were stoned most of the time).
Different people reach different conclusions from weighing the facts. They may decide that they don't need to consume any of the above. OTOH, they may decide that they are willing to risk marijuana and booze, but that tobacco is a really bad idea. If they already use tobacco, then sadly they may not be able to stop.
What I have found, however, is that very few longhairs use hard drugs, because they are more likely to really weigh the risks than Joe Average.
As for me, I drink but I don't smoke tobacco. Kindly read the 5th amendment.