new thread
A few days ago, my friend/guitarist came to practice and his girlfriend kept calling him, while he kept ignoring her. We didn't really want pry and ask what was up, so I had no clue. But today I found out that his girlfriend told him she, "Wasn't attracted to him anymore with long hair/ facial hair". Now they've been dating for three years, and he's had long hair since the fifth grade. This made me so angry, and I feel so bad for him in his place. Had my girlfriend said something like that, I don't know if I'd ever want to talk to her. Just thought I'd share.
TMK,
Just my opinion but it sounds to me like she has found somebody else and is using the "longhair" issue as a power leveraging tool in the relationship. Don't think it would mater much if he did cut his hair.
peace, jonalbear
If he cuts his hair short and shaves his beard she'll probably dump him eventually anyway.
I know a few guys who went to salon and got short "trendy" yuppie styles and some who previously had facial hair shaved it off for their girlfriends only to be dumped within a few months after they found someone who they claimed they liked better, but it was because in many cases that the guy had a bigger bank account.
most women who ask their boy friends to get short haircuts assume that if they do so they will get a very good paying job and they will be able to buy them more things.
it's all about materialism and many materialistic women associate short hair and a clean-shaven look with someone who is successful than a long haired shaggy guy who they associate with being Unemployed and a "loser" and much of this is due to media distortion perpetuated by the industry in Hollywood.
any female that insinuates that you would look much better with short hair is probably a potential gold digger and not interested in what you want-dump her!
I can say from experience that this same shit happened to me with one of my ex girlfriends the first time I grew my hair to my shoulders. She didn't like my long hair and begged me to cut it off and I was dumb enough to do it, because I thought that was "love", wrong!!! We freaking broke up two weeks later after I cut it all off too! But now I have been growing my hair for over 5 years and it's past the middle of my back.
If you are not accepted for who and what you are, dump them. Control freakery has no place in a successful relationship.
Although understandable that you'd think this, it isn't the case for a few reasons. A) we're in highschool, she doesn't expect him to go off and get nice job B) she hasn't found someone else (she's still obsessed with the guy), she never said anything about dumping him because of it, and was just stating her displeasure. She is just a very anal, controlling person, and I guess decided to express what she'd probably been feeling for a while. I just cant believe she can't accept him for who he is.
maybe not in this particular case, but most shows which are targeted at teenagers and young adults already have their
Ken and Barbie stereotypes in place and young minds are impressionable.
In regards to "entertainment", short haired and clean-shaven men are portrayed as being successful and desirable to the ladies while long haired Men are portrayed as being dysfunctional, drug addicts, serial killers or just dirt-bags. it's a stereotype which is quite prevalent in our culture and unfortunately that many people have bought into.
the teenage girl`s mind is very impressionable and easy to indoctrinate into this belief even than the teenage male who may be more likely to challenge such beliefs and by the time she is in her 20`s unless she starts to challenge these beliefs herself it is highly unlikely that she is going to fall for some long haired guy unless he is highly successful.
bottom line is most women are attracted to money and Hollywood sells a stereotypical image of a Man with short hair who is clean-shaven as that type which the teenage girl will desire when she becomes an adult.
on the other hand, long haired women are presented in the majority of TV shows while women with less than shoulder length
hair are not prevalent unless it's a senior citizen in the role(think "Harry`s Law".)
young women with short to closely cropped hair are just as hard to sell unless the female happens to be playing an Alien such as Morena Baccarin in the "V" series.
the message is: Aliens are supposed to be weird freaks so it's acceptable for the female to have very short hair.
it's all about appealing to the masses and their comfort zones and rather than challenge them Hollywood continues to give them something that they are used to and it's a viscous cycle over and over again.
She isn't attracted to him anymore, period. She's just using an aspect of his physical appearance as a scapegoat. Mark my words, whether or not he conforms to her wishes, they will not be together for much longer. The best thing he can do is cut his losses--but NOT his hair--and remain true to who he really is, because once she's gone, he'll still have to live with himself.
--Val