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Hello again mlhh! i just came across this to myself; the purpose of why i'm growing my hair long and it's funny that i don't really know the exact answer. and don't know if this is sane or otherwise; i like to grow my hair long but i don't really want to show my long hair to the public - including to my family members and friends. instead, i'm more comfortable if i can hide my long hair from being noticed by anybody -by using any means-wear a cap or hat, etc. i think it seems like i'm growing my hair to myself, and i like to enjoy it to myself; playing with it, keep track with the growing rate, but only to MYSELF. is this sane and does anybody else experiencing this? please share :)
Hi ahseng,
Such a dilemma you have my friend but one thing I can say and that is as long as you enjoy your hair long then its a keeper:)It's a shame you feel the need to hide your hair from family being if they really cared about your feelings it shouldn't even be an issue.I cover my hair at work mainly to protect it from my work environment, not to conceal it from those who might disapprove.Other than that I bun it with hair sticks when outdoors so I can "A" protect it from getting tangled and "B" so I can still show off my hair to the world but in a restrained state.Used to wear hats all the time when outdoors but now only for work.Anyway keep the faith ;) Cheers
Mârk
i like to see people wear their long hair in bun. wondering how does it feel to wear bun. that's still a dream yet to be reached. haha. thanks btw :D
Hey ahseng!
Damn, buddy... I feel for you! :(
Back when I was a kid, as well as well into my teens (around 15-16), I grew up with a very strict, old-school father. He was born and raised by German parents, and in his eyes, no son of his should ever be allowed to do anything that he considered "feminine", long hair included! I can recally a ton of fights with him about my hair being too long, and at least 2 ponytails being cut off with force, with threats of losing any other rights I had as a kid. Not good memories.
I do realize you are finding yourself in a simmilar place and situation right now, and I want to tell you, that even though it sucks, ain´t the way it should be, and is extremely hurtful... things will get better, my friend.
I am 29 years old now, living on my own, earning my own money, and doing exactly what I want to do with my appearance. My father has no choice but accept it, and I do hear his comments once in a while, and have to put my foot down and let him know that I love him unconditionally, because he´s my dad, and that I expect the same from him, no matter the length of my hair or any other such superficial factor.
If it´s hard for you to grow your hair now because of your family´s outlook on things, perhaps there is no other way but to give in it and keep it short-ish, until you have the opportinty to move for yourself and make your own decisions.
If I am understanding this wrongly, and you actually do live at your own place, I have to tell you that even though you might live in a different culture than me, that love and respect between family members needs to be upkept, and not tramped upon and demanded. It´s your body, and your life, and you are the one in command, no one else.
Either way, I hope things work out! A big man-hug from Norway! :)
hey Raul!
so you're from norway? never thought of that. i thought european people are more open towards long hair on men than us in asia?
btw, thanks for the encouragement :D
i went through a period of time before it was shoulder length when i would hide my hair by tucking in behind my shirt collar, and i had more people comment on it being hidden than they do now that i wear it past my shoulders and over my ears. i'm happy and proud to display it "as is."
Somebody is bound to see it or notice it. If you're someone who likes to be on the water, there's no way of hiding your hair -- everyone's going to see it. Otherwise, your SO's definitely going to know that you have long hair... and either threaten to break up with you or encourage you to grow it out.
It's definitely not something personal. However, if you don't make too big of a deal with it and keep it tied back and inconspicuous, you could hide it in plain sight and most people won't bat an eye at it.
Besides, you're already sharing your stories, with us, right?
haha, right :D
but the situation will be different when sometimes, my female colleagues commented how my hair had grown. suddenly, i can talk about it openly. and suddenly it's not personal anymore. haha
Are you getting hassles from parents/employer/school?
I have to tell you I started growing my hair long in 1964,
today at the age of 58 my hair is still long. I have never
attempted to hide my hair, my hair is my trademark and has
been for many years now.
For me, I got lots of complaints from parents/employers/schools
over the years. I started growing my hair long in 1964,
a number of years later I read my mom the riot act, "this is
my house, I pay the bills, and i make the rules. If you don't like it you can leave." That ended the complaints.
School doens't last forever, eventually you'll graduate, and college is a great environment for growing long hair. And there
are employers who won't complain about your hair especially when
you're good at your job.
unfortunately, malaysian public colleges and universities doesn't allow their male students to grow their hair long but it's different in private colleges. but i do plan on growing my hair long when stepping into working world because here in malaysia, most of private architectural firm doesn't really care much about long hair on men. just like you said, as long as you excel in your job, it's all ok. thanks btw.
For some people, long hair can be very personal, only for themselves or perhaps their SO...regardless of whether they would face condemnation for wearing it visibly. Your hair, your business. If you like to hide it, that's fine...enjoy it for yourself. Obviously, with time, it will become more difficult to hide completely, but you still don't have to show it completely.
There are a lot of people out there who have no idea whatsoever how long my hair is...obviously they can see my bun, but the actual length is usually hidden...I don't really "hide" it...rather, it is up at work/etc. to protect it, but the effect is the same.
And the nice thing is if you decide not to hide it you can change in a moment!
Enjoy your hair and don't worry too much about others.
i think i got something: i'm not really proud of my hair because i realize it make my head and face a bit weird, BUT that doesn't mean i hate it but instead, i love my hair to be long. that's why i don't really like to show my hair off in the public. but the situation will be different when sometimes, my female colleagues commented how my hair had grown. my feeling suddenly bloomed because of that. and suddenly, i can talk about it openly. haha