new thread
Hi all,
I've been looking for somewhere that has friendly folks and is good source of information, hopefully this is the place! I've decided to try and grow my hair out, and have been going strong since the middle of October. I've always wanted to have long hair as long as I can remember... I did try for almost a year when I was just out of high school, but my wife hated it I eventually cut it to avoid the martial stress it was causing on our new marriage. 10 years later she isn't keen on the idea but so far has been understanding.
I think I may be in the "awkward" stage now because it's getting harder and harder to keep my hair "professional" for work. Any recommendations? I work with many businesses as a consultant and while I am not required to meet any sort of specific dress code, I have to be "professional" and "neatly groomed". I've read using hair styling products is bad, but my hair is extremely thick and if I don't use anything in it it just "poofs" out and looks all crazy! Any thoughts?
I included a pic of my the day after my last haircut in October...I'll see if I can get a more current one too.
In regards to the business situation, it's recomended to keep the party in the back and business in the front. When in doubt, gel it out, although you must be careful since hair gel contains cheicals known for damaging hair. If the front is long enough, put the behind your ears and if you want to do natural low-maintenance, ask your wife for some bobby pins (or just buy some that are near the same hair color so no one can tell). I' lucky enough to actually choose an interest in the IT field since they're usually very lax with dress and hair protocol.
As for the "poofiness" it depends on your hair type and genetics. Hell, I've been grown for 14 months now and since month 6-8 it's poofed out. With time though your hair will become long enough to weigh itself down (also dependant of your goal length as well) and even when I was at 2 1/2 years before my cut it was still somewhat poofy, still manageable and decent looking though.
For hair washing product what you should look for is Sodium Sulfate, since that is a key ingrediant to avoid because it can wreak havoc on your hair because of how it strips the natural oils and leave it dry and vulnerable. I've heard through the grapevine there are oils like Coconut Oil and Jojoba as well as Henna to enrich your strands and to ake them look even more aeshtetically pleasing. Conditioner is definitely a must, as a heads-up. Another piece of advice is if you can avoid it, try not to wash your hair every day since again it strips the natural oils and gives it a dry and frizzy look. Give your scalp time to produce said oils since they are what make your hair look healthy and give a sheen to them.
Aside from that, I'd recommend asking the other users since they've been around the hair block for far longer than myself, I'm sure they'll provide a plethora of information regarding haircare.
This site might also provide useful information as well:
http://hairreligion.tripod.com/
I have to disagree, what is described above is a mullet and
i'd suggest avoiding it. I'd suggest standing your ground
and let your hair grow long front, side and back. if you're
really good at your job to the point where your employer can't
stand to be without you then you can do things like grow your
hair long and keep it long. I've had a number of jobs where I initially got hassles about the long hair, but after a short
period of time I became indispensable to the company and they'd
bend over backwards to keep me. That meant even though they
hated long hair at first, they'd overlook that and tolerate it.
I started growing my hair in 1964, 48 years later i've still got
long hair, have kept it long for all these years and have had numerous jobs over the years. I've been at my current job for
27 years now, and the company tolerates my long hair, cut off
shorts, etc. Before that i've had numerous other jobs with
my hair remaining long. The bottom line: if they want you to cut your hair then seriously consider looking elsewhere for
a job. My skills, experience and work ethic are such that I can do that.
Actually I was referring to using gel to styling your hair back, or if you wantto keeyour hair fromgetting damaged, using bobby pins that can hide in your hair.
Welcome. Glad you decided to join us in this journey to growing hair long.
I always get a kick out of this. I'd be working for a company
that wants to project a "professional" image. and who is telling you to project that image? A guy in his 60s going 99% bald with a comb over that goes from one ear to the other. To me
that screams out "unprofessioan" a thousand times more than
any guy with long hair does.
I often wonder if these guys ob ject to long hair because they
are jeoulous that I can grow my hair and they can't.
I would suggest keep it growing and soon you'll be able to
tie it in a nice neat pony tail. If you want to grow it longer
i'd suggest avoiding trims, thinning the hair out.
Hey TommyD!
Welcome to the tribe, bro.
Congratulations on recognizing your true identity - a born long hair and now you are ceasing that identity by letting your hair grow out.
The one tips that I would offer you are:
1. Keep your hair clear.
2. Keep away from scissors.
3. Try tying your hair back in a ponytail as soon as you can.
4. Use gel to keep your hair "neat and professional" until these hairs reach the tie forming your ponytail.
Your long haired bro, Raymond
Hey!
Glad to read you decided to grow your hair! Thumbs up for that!
1) Regarding the awkward stage, is considered the hair growth stage in which your hair is not too long as to be considered long and is not too short as to be considered short. You will realize that you're in the awkward stage when your bangs are long but not long enough to put them behind your ears haha.
2) I would not recommend using gel since it contains alcohol and that dries out your hair. If your hair dries out, then it will get frizzy and it will poof out a lot more when it gets longer. So I DO NOT suggest using gel.
Unfortunately, the awkward stage is the hardest part of the hair growth and you just have to let it go, dont worry about it. Your hair will look ugly no matter what you do and that is perfectly normal. But please, don't use gel or any product that contains alcohol or you will kill your hair.
3) Like someone said before, try not washing your hair everyday. If possible, try not to use shampoo or use sulfates-free shampoos (ALWAYS read at the ingredients even if it says that is sulfates-free).
Shampoo is basically a detergent that is used to remove oil from your hair. For this reason, it contains harsh ingredients that will damage your hair if you use it every day.
Conditioner is what nourishes your hair after using shampoo and does not contain sulfates.
Thats why I would limit the times that you wash your hair with shampoo and use conditioner instead. Actually, right now, I am not washing my hair with shampoo AT ALL. I just use conditioner to wash my hair. Yes, it does not remove all the oil completely like shampoo does (thats what shampoo is for) but conditioner does not contain sulfates and it's ok to leave some oils on your hair .
4) Try not to blow dry your hair . Heat usually dries out your hair as well. If you really have to, use a heat protectant.
I hope these tips help !
Thanks for the tips and info! I just took a quick shot with my webcam of where I'm at right after 7ish months. I've not measured or anything but it's getting pretty long on the sides, well past my ears now. I did get a neck only trim around 4 months to avoid the mullet look that was starting to creeping out... I'm definitely trying to avoid a mullet, that's just not the look I'm going for! I don't plan on getting any more trims, hopefully now that the sides are longer the mullet look wont be too apparent.
Luckily nobody has said anything about my hair yet at work, so hopefully it doesn't come up! I am just trying to do what I can do avoid it from coming up. That is funny about the IT field comment because that is the field I am in! For the most part it is pretty lax, but every now and then I go to a client that has a pretty "old school" dress code, and I typically just try to dress like the clients I'm going to. I'd like to think I'm pretty invaluable but doesn't everyone :)?
Great start, Tommy D! Looks great. There's a big difference between your first and second shots! I need to look professional for work and feel that there are a couple of months where that's hard but it gets better. I use Fructis pure clean finishing paste to get me through the most unruly times. Now that my hair is about shoulder length I use a combination of the paste and smoothing cream also from Fructis pure clean. Ive found those products to have great hold and they are light and non sticky.
Welcome to MLHH TommyD.
Your hair looks great. It looks neat to me. You should be able to grow it out with a minimum of problems. Once you reach shoulder length, it gets real easy, and it will stay in place and look neat with a single ponytail tie.
Scott
Hey ! I also work in the IT industry ( for a very famous worldwide company ) and fortunately, they are pretty open minded. We even have guys with dreadlocks working in the office , so they don't even care about your look as long as your job is done okay.
Probably, it depends greatly on type of work you're doing in the company. I'm also in IT. As long as you have to deal with clients, you really need to keep your look clean and neat (well, there's nothing wrong with hair, but the society thinks the other way). Lots of clients come from other business areas, like banking etc (if we're talking about outsource model, for example), so it'd be better not to shock them. They are conservative and so on. Probably, it's just your occasion.
But if you're in development (I'm in dev, yeah), you can do whatever you feel. I heard that sometimes interviewers in our country don't even like when applicants for dev-position come in suits as it's not natural.
So yeah, IT is really open-minded and free, but it is so just till the moment your job is to represent the company.
Anyway, considering your hair - it looks neat and nice for me! Although it might be harder to look neat at some position during the awkward stage, it will change once you're able to tuck your hair behind the ears.
This is it. Good luck on your growing path. I know it's possible to "keep professional look" with long hair, so don't mind others opinion while you're growing.
Serge.
It depends on the type of business you're in. I work for a company in the sign supply industry and the company and customers
have no problem with my long hair (i've been at this company for
27 years now).
Many of these customers are very old and alot of them also have long hair, and many of them dress the same way I do. (Many of them work outside all day installing signs.)
So on a typical day there will be a good number of customers come in wearing long hair and shorts. And many of them are
on the elderly side. (We have customers who are in their
80s and 90s and many of them have their own business and will work every day right up to the day they die.)
I get the impression that alot of these customers feel very
much at ease in our building when they see someone like me with
long hair, almost always wearing shorts, etc. The only ones who come into our building wearing a suit and tie are the salesmen
for vendors. The customers certainly don't.
Hello Tommy,
I am so happy you are going to grow out your hair! Your hair will look so awesome when it gets longer! Your hair has such a nice texture and color which mkes it perfect for growing out.
Please don't worry about the so-called "poofing". Your hair appears as if it will stop the poofing soon. I think you have some time before the awkward stage. I don't even think you will have a bad awkward stage. Just enjoy your wonderful hair and keep it growing! I sincerely hope you are able to grow your hair without marital stress. I am fortunate to have a very supportive wife. I wish you much success in your growing journey! Great week to you my friend and welcome to the board!
Ted
Hi there TommyD,
First of all, a warm WELCOME to MLHH to you!!
Your hair growth so-far looks excellent to my eyes (I just took a look at your most recent pic which you included); so I hope you continue to keep it growing.
One suggestion I had used during my own "awkward stage" era was to minimize the noticeability of my hair growing out by wearing slightly dressier clothes than I usually wear -- that, plus whatever it takes to survive until ponytail time, be it gel, hair spray, hats, or bandanas! (But since I don't work in an office setting, hats & bandanas were OK for my situation; but I realize probably not for you....)
Regardless, my advise is to just stay tuned here and visit often, as you'll find plenty of excellent advise to read and help you along your journey.
My best to you, and as the saying goes: "Onward & Downward!
- Ken in San Francisco
Hello Tommy, welcome to the board!
Just do what feels right, and ignore anyone who says anything different. The world is full of people who just hate to see other people happy, and they will latch onto you if you're not careful. The awkward stage will pass, though it will be a while. I'm growing from a military (literally) cut from almost a year ago. I'm almost out of it, but not quite yet... So keep your spirits up, and your scissors down!