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Hey all, I was recommended this site recently and I love it. I've had long hair for a majority of my pre-teen and teenage life. However along with this comes a great amount of emotional pain from the harassment of others. I try not to let it bother me but it does. That is not why I am posting however. I am posting because I am going into college next year and I'm afraid of being ridiculed even more than I am now. My hair isn't LONG but it's decently long (about a little less than shoulder length). I was seeing what people's opinions on cutting it short as soon as I graduate high school. I'm doing this because my hair is damaged from when I used to not take care of it much. My hair currently is dead; no layers, my bangs have grown out, and it's curly in some parts and wavy/straight in others.
Should I carry through with this drastic change and then let it grow out again throughout the summer/freshman year in college? I'm obsessed with music so as silly and stereotypical as it may sound, long hair is really important to me. Thanks in advance, Zach.
Haircut I'd get if it were short.
I'm not sure how damaged your hair is but I started growing my hair
long in 1964, it is now 2013 and it is still long. i had long hair when I started college, it was still long when I graduated.
By the time I graduated the hair was knee length.
I would mention that the more I got complaints from others the more
I viewed it as an incentive to not only keep my hair long, but to keep it growing longer. Throughout the 1960s I got complaints from teachers, school administrators to cut my hair. I didn't and the more complaints I got the more I was determined to
keep it long and let it grow longer. In 1973 I graduated from
high school and went to college. At college there were no complaints from the teachers or administrators, although some
employers did complain. Those complaints also served as an
incentive to grow my hair to terminal length (knee length).
But the important point is the more I got complaints the more
it served as an incentive to keep it long, not cut it, and
let it grow even longer. I din't care what others thought of
my hair, it was my hair and chose to have it long, to keep it
long, and let it grow to terminal length. If someone didn't like they could go jump out he window.
Hi LHIA,
I just don't think I could have said it any better! This is an awesome response! our life, our hair our decision! 'Nuff said I say!
Zach,
Please do what you want to do with your hair! If you decide to keep growing it, please keep us updated! I do hope you grow it though! Welcome to the board my friend!
I'm not sure if this constitutes as "damage" but this is what my hair has become in 5 years. The left is something I just took and the right is 2008. Is my hair just becoming curly from puberty? Or would it help if I got it layered? I've heard that when one reaches puberty their hair may change. Jimmy Page for example had straight hair and then it became wild/curly.
Hi Zach,
Your hair does not look damaged at all here. It is possible your hair has changed texture. Some people say they had different hair types at different stages of their life. The way you can tell what type of hair you truly have is to clarify it. By this I mean you wash with a clarifying shampoo and do not condition it. When you get out of the shower, just pat it dry. Do not comb or brush it or touch it until it dries. When your hair dries, you will see its true straightness/curliness. After you clarify, always make sure you go back and condition because of the harshness of the shampoo.
The reason you clarify is to strip all product off the hair. Conditioners and other products tend to weigh the hair down and change the texture. Also, some people have hair that gets curlier the longer it gets. Other people have hair that gets straighter because the added weight pulls the curl out. This is why it's so fun to grow our hair! Hope this helps a little.
Ted
Your hair doesn't look damaged to me. I'd let it grow and
cut any hair.
As your hair gets longer the curls may dissapper.
Hey Zach,
I had longish hair (sounds like it was probably close to where your at) when I was your age, and I cut it to appease my friends and family. I kept short hair for next 10 years even though I literally dreaded going to barber every time I had to do it. I hated having short hair but kept it for everyone around me.
It's a tough mindset to change, but eventually I decided I was tired of doing what others wanted and started growing it out again. I'm almost a year in to that now and I am much happier with the way I look, even in this awkward stage.
Think about it before you do it, and maybe you can spare yourself the regret that I had for so long.
-Tommy
-Tommy
What part of the world do you live in?
On average, I believe that in the United States, college environments are much more accepting of long hair than high schools. Of course, there's a very great diversity of colleges and universities. So be sure to do some research before you apply. Some religious and business schools might even forbid long hair on males. In general, the friendliest schools for long haired guys would probably be liberal arts colleges that have reputations for being left-leaning: Reed, Lewis & Clark, Oberlin, Grinnell, Carleton, Macalester, Beloit, Bennington, Hampshire, Bard, Middlebury, etc.
You can start by taking a look at the Princeton Review lists. They have categories like: "Birkenstock-wearing tree-hugging clove-smoking vegetarians", "LGBT friendly", "Most liberal students".
If you have some specific schools in mind, you can run it by the people on this board; perhaps someone here is currently attending that school or is an alumnus. If you don't know where you want to go, but know the general type of school, maybe you could ask people here for suggestions of, for example, longhair friendly engineering schools.
Unless your hair is in really really horrible shape, I'd suggest not cutting your hair that short. The shorter you cut it, the more you'll have to wait. I'd suggest letting it grow until you're well past the awkward stage, when you can tie it into a ponytail, then periodically trim off the bottom inch or two. Eventually, the new hair that you're now taking better care of will replace the old ratty hair. Until then, DON'T DO ANY MASSIVE CUT, just remove any split ends, knots and tangles.
Good luck to you.
The best way to find out if your prospetive college is long hair
friendly is to actually go and visit the school. Go visit the school, experience the environment, etc. Not all colleges are long hair friendly, and some have very strict dress codes.
Also when you check out the school check out the city around it too. In some cities/towns there is deep resentment against
some local colleges. (Especially if it is a large college
with lots of buildings that displaced long time residents, or
if the college students have lots of loud parties, or if the college has huge crowds coming in for football games
making parking and life in the neighborhood a nightmare.
And finally check out the local laws on voting. There are some
colleges now where they won't let you vote unless your parents live in that city/town.
LHIA brings up some good points. Especially about the surrounding neighborhood. My college (located in a small town during the eighties) was long hair friendly and quite left-wing, but the more conservative townies teased us as a bunch of hippies. Personally didn't bother me, though, and I spent most of my time on campus anyway.
Something else I thought about is that even if the school is overall fine for longhairs (e.g. as was the case where I did my graduate work during the nineties), things could vary among different departments, programs, dorms and sports teams. ROTC is an obvious example. Business, pre-law, pre-med may have more conservative standards. Some frats, sports teams, clubs might also frown on long hair.
The ones with the strict dress codes tend to be religious / bible colleges, e.g. Brigham Young, Bob Jones, etc. Steer clear of those!
...it'll be something else. People suck and unfortunately the general public will always find something wrong with everyone. And if you cut your hair because of the opinions of others, you'll ultimately have something else that people don't like brought to light along with having short hair, which seeing as you made your way to this board, I'll assume is something you don't want.
Aside from this post, Just stick around this board for a few months, show us some better pictures, get to know everyone, and we will always show you support. Stick around this community and always remember the two week rule: if you're thinking about cutting your hair, wait two weeks. If you at any point of that two weeks doubt whether or not you want to cut your hair, wait another two weeks. It takes months and years to grow out your hair, it takes seconds to wipe all of that progress away.
