new thread
I started growing my hair out in the 5th grade; that's when I discovered music. My mom always hated my long hair, though my dad liked it as he had it for many years. I'm sure many people just thought I was going through a "music phase". God how wrong they were. Everyone that I've grown up with in school that had long hair at one point cut it within a year or two. All the people I tried to start a band with is into sports now. I'm in my senior year now still with long hair (though in 7th grade my mom made me cut it and I looked so goofy with short hair) after all the ridicule, bad hair days, and suggestions to get a hair cut.
Has anyone ever had their hair disregarded as a phase?
Hasn't everyone?
My dad is in his 80s now, and tells a funny story about comparing notes with another guy. They both had adult sons, and both no longer thought it was a phase. I think my dad was grateful because my hair is just long. The other guy's son has green hair!
I'm a senior too. I've always had long hair and loved it. My parents didn't mind too much.But last week all that changed. My girlfriend found out I was seeing another girl. She set me up and while asleep cut off my hair. I had to get a buzz cut, my first one. I admit I cried.Everyone at school has laughed at me. For me long hair is not a phase, it is a way of life.
That is so sad to hear Chad, you probably didn't do the right thing by your girlfriend but what she did was horrid, that's no way to rectify a situation if you ask me. And now you have to wait years. *Brohug*
Also Zach, I really fail to see how it is a phase, a long phase at best usually lasts 6-12 months depending on the person, it takes at least 3x as long to get a decent head of hair. Even before you've even got to your desired length it would be stupid for anyone to see it as just a phase
My last haircut was February 15, 2007, at the age of 13. Now, almost 7 years later, My dad still seems convinced that it's a phase. My dad had long hair from the ages of 18 until somewhere around 30, kept my hair long when I was a kid (albeit a mullet until I was 8 or so), and he still claims that it is a phase. Some co-workers also think that it's a phase, and ofcourse there are always the people who also call it "just hair."
Today, my hair is waist length, I have 5-6 inches of my natural hair color at the roots (I dyed it black for about 3 years), the ends are bleached from when they were dyed red and purple, but overall it looks vaguely natural, seeing as the colors have started to fade away. I include all of this because dying my hair black was a phase, as was purple and red ends. Right now I want to grow out my natural dark brown again, but I may someday return to dying it. I go through phases where I tend to keep it braided, phases where I often wear pigtails, phases where I keep it in a bun, and phases where I have it down for days and weeks at a time. There are phases when I don't brush it for a week or longer, and times where I take exceptional care of it 24/7 (like right now). All of these are phases, and I've had 4 years of playing with my hair to go in and out of all of them.
Long hair, however, is a constant. Long hair is not a phase, it is a way of life, it is how I see myself in my head, it is something that keeps me centered, something that I know I always have control of in my life, no matter what. Cutting my hair is just not an option, and I can say quite confidently and unapologetically that I love my hair more than I love any person. So yes, I know exactly how you feel. It is not a phase, it is a very important part of my body and piece of mind, in a way that I cannot put into words.
Jarvis
Right now I want to grow out my natural dark brown again, but I may someday return to dying it. I go through phases where I tend to keep it braided, phases where I often wear pigtails, phases where I keep it in a bun, and phases where I have it down for days and weeks at a time. There are phases when I don't brush it for a week or longer, and times where I take exceptional care of it 24/7 (like right now). All of these are phases, and I've had 4 years of playing with my hair to go in and out of all of them.
I also go through phases where vary the styles, much of the time
my hair is loose, but i'll also go through phases where i'll braid my hair, wear it in a bun, wear it in pig tails, or wear it in a pony tail. I've never colored my hair, for many years
it was black, now it is all grey. The styles I wear it in
are a phase, but having long hair is not. The hair will always remain long and will remain the natural color.
I would also mention I never brush my hair, after I condition it, i'll finger comb to get out the tangles and
then comb it with a wide tooth comb. And then it won't be combed until the next conditioning.
Hey Zach M,
I hear ya. I don't remember anyone saying to me that my long hair was just a phase that I was going through. Many have advised me to cut my hair. One person even offered to take me to a barbar shop and to pay for a haircut. I declined. I have wanted long hair throughout my life. At fifty-five (55) years of age I decided to my guage 4 buzz cut on Mar. 9, 2011 was going to be my last haircut. My hair is now fifteen (15) inches in length. I intend to let it grow to terminal length. Someone last week told me that my long hair makes me stand out and that it might be an impediment to working with older people. I have found that many older people like my long hair. It just goes to show that you can not lump all older people together and say that they all feel this way anymore than you can lump all younger people together and say that they all feel this way.
I really like my long hair. It is part of who I am; it is part of my identity. Notice that I said that it is "part of who I am". It is not the totality of my identity but it is an important part of my identity.
I think that it is the same with you, bro.
Raymond
When I was younger i'd get lots of complaints from
older people. Now that i'm 59 and involved in a civil
war group, I get no complaints from older people. The average
age of the civil war group is about 72, at 59 i'm one of the youngest in the group. And i've gotten no complaints about my hair.
In my experience the complaints stopped when I hit the age of the
mid 40s. Alot of it is people complaining about long hair
on younger men because they can. When you get older you get more
respect and tolerance for idiosyncrisies/being eccentric.
My long hair phase started in 1964. Now that it is 2013
i'm still going through that phase. I'll still be going though that phsse until the day I die.
What is your Civil War group called? Does it have a web site?
Heck, yea. I think almost every kid hears the "phase" line a time or two. I think parents go through a "call it a phase" phase. For me the phase has lasted about 40 years and counting.
The best way to deal with parents about hair is to keep it looking really good and don't engage in discussions about it if they bring it up. A one person conversation becomes boring and sooner or later they'll look for something else to hassle you about. Luckily, you're just about to the age where they're going to have to decide they're not responsible for everything you do. Become increasingly independent, succeed in school and work all while wearing your hair the way you want. They'll probably stop mentioning it and even if they do it won't matter then.
Zach M,
My music and hair "phase" is still going and growing strong at almost 61 years of age!
peace,
jonalbear