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In my 50+ years, my hair has gone through many different phases, but I have always been a longhair at heart. I bravely kept my curly hair long at times when I wasn't supposed to, according to (almost) everybody else. (There is something about a curly mane that really, REALLY irks a lot of people, I don't know why.)
And I wore it well past my shoulders until recently, when I realized that my widow's peak had basically vanished and my hair had become too thin over the forehead. (The rest of the head is still fine to date.)
So I went to the barber and cut it off. Then I discovered that it had gone gunmetal gray. (I had been experimenting with highlights and hair dye for years, and it happened pretty fast, so I didn't really see it coming.)
To make a long story short, I have been wearing it very short, military style, for the past year, to everybody's happiness but my own. I tried growing it out a little bit, couldn't get past how ragged it looked... But my point is, being a longhair is not necessarily about looking good. A longhair's relationship with his hair is so much more. Hair is something that moves with you, that falls on your eyes, that your fingers seek instinctively when you are nervous or just content. It is a part of you.
So my question is: should I do the George Carlin thing, and live with it? Or should I simply accept the fact that my proud longhair years are behind me, like so many other things, and just move on?
Do whatever the hell makes you happy! If that is having a friars fringe down to your shoulders, that is great. If it is playing with it and styling up a mountain range on your head and coloring it like alpenglow, great! (Actually, that would look totally awesome!) If it makes you happy to shave it and polish your pate, Yay! for you. Your hair or not-hair, your choices. If someone doesn't like it...it sure as heck isn't YOUR problem!
I agree with Trolley Pup - you need to decide what makes you pleased and happy when you look at yourself... If you want long hair, then great... screw the grey and the receding hair line... If you feel more confident about yourself with it kept short, then that's OK, too. having long hair is something very important to everyone here, but we would rather have you feel good about yourself over anything else... but you have to look at it from your perspective - not anyone elses...personally, I love the look of long curly hair on a guy... I know how you feel about the lost of hair, though - I struggle with thinning top, too, and I wonder how thin it will get before I look ridiculous... but, we need to evaluate as we go, don't we?
I would agree.
Well said!
Hey Ashgrove,
From what you say in your post you are a born longhair; you have wanted to have long hair throughout your life. It is part of who you are. Accept that fact, dude. Let your flowing curly locks flow as long as you like them to. Let it grow to terminal length.
Your long haired bro,
Raymond
Hi Ashgrove,
I want to know who the hell thinks there's something really wrong with a curly mane? Nothing could be further from the truth! I want them to show me a stylist good enough to create the natural curls which people are born with! Dammit, it ain't ever gonna happen!
Well, I am here to tell ya that a gunmetal gray curly long mane would look just beautiful in my book! What a bummer you had it cut! I would say that you should do what your heart tells you to do. Not someone else's heart says! To quote a famous person, "those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind". However, I would absolutely love to see you grow that wonderful hair to your waist man! Enjoy your hair and your life-for YOU! You have come to this board-which tells me you are a longhair at heart! Please follow your destiny my friend! Welcome to the board!
Ted
I say grow it.....just today a co worker was shaving his head.... and I said to him... how ironic.... you are not balding...
I on the other hand want to get past shoulder length... and am balding in the back....
He told me I should keep the beard and shave the hair..
NO WAY..
GROWING IT OUT TILL IT FALLS OUT!
We support each other !
I'm still pretty young, but I was cursed with "bad hair." It's straight, very thin all over, very fine, and stringy no matter what I do. I've had some recession and thinning over the years too. My family is very forward about how "bad" it looks. Most bald people seem to have more hair than I do, no joke. So I can sympathize with having less-than-perfect hair and also wanting it to be long.
Hair is a very personal thing, and you'll have to decide for yourself what you want to do. I'm occasionally frustrated with my long hair, but I know from experience that I am always unhappy with short hair. Currently my hair is at mid-back length. I plan to keep my hair long until I die, no matter what.
Hi Ashgrove,
First of all, WELCOME to MLHH!!!
Secondly, I have some degree of receding hairline in front, too -- not horribly noticeable; but definitely not the full and ideal hairline that I had during my teens and into my mid-20s.
The "Fashion Police" will tell you that you're too old to look good with long hair, that your hair is too thin, that a receding hairline will look less noticeable if you keep your hair short, etc., etc., blah blah blah yakkity yakkity yak, big yawn, wagging finger of guilt if you don't follow their rules, and on & on & on & on...
The fact remains, however, that your hairline will be the same -- regardless of whether you choose short or long, or somewhere in-between.
George Carlin in my opinion is an AWESOME LEGEND! Very much an independent thinker (which explains why he could make people laugh until their ribs hurt!), can you imagine him ever bowing down to the Fashion Police, or even caring one hoot over what they advise? Nothing wrong with deciding to have short hair, if that's what makes you happiest in the end; but if you're NOT happy, what are you waiting for?
Your hair is growing, even as we speak!!
- Ken in San Francisco
I decided many years ago to screw the fashion police. They would have a field day with me between the long hair, the moustache,
the cut off shorts i always wear. I've had long hair for 49
years and it will stay long for the rest of my life no matter
what the fashion police say.
What you do with your hair is up to you. My family genes indicate
that balding won't be an issue for me, but it it were
i'd keep the hair long even if it had a bald spot on top.
Oh and my hair has a ton of grey now, it will remain grey or
white until the day I die. I keep saying I earned every grey
hair every time someone told starting in 1964 that I needed to
get a hair cut.
I have been blessed with a full head of hair into my 60s. (Good hair genes) However. I see no issue with growing ones hair with any measure of MPB. A good friend of ours has had his hair recede into the classic "horseshoe" and still he has a tail. just a six incher. but it looks fine. He is comfortable with what has been handed him. Only you know what is comfortable, and if it longer hair. by all means. grow it. By the way. that gunmetal color is a spectacular look. Wear it proudly.
As others have said, the decision is entirely up to you. I also have thin (and thinning) hair....however, the sides and back are thick and healthy......so my thought has always been "Why cut off the good stuff"
+1
I started thinning in my mid-30s, went 95% bald in my mid-40s. Now in my mid-50s, I've had a long time to get used to unrequested critiques of my hair style.
Frankly, I don't care what others think. And sometimes, I even agree that it doesn't look the best. But I'm not a longhair for how looks, I wear my hair long for how it feels.
After all this time, it's part of my identity. At work, there are two Bruces. I tell people to look for the bald guy with the ponytail. They never miss me.
As for color, mine was always a mousey brown. Finally I'm starting to gray, and I think it's looking much better.
PS: Hats are your friend, especially in the sun or the cold.
"...Hats are your friend..."
I may be there in the next few years or so... but I am growing what I can as long as I can....
I am glad you did the same....
That's a great tack. It not only states you are a longhair but that you are bald on top. Unless they are mentally impaired, they then know they don't have to tell you that. After all, you already know that because you've told them so.
We have a guest bathroom that is seldom used, and the previous owner put the light switch on the wall by the hinge side of the door. People used to tell us repeatedly that the switch was on the wrong side. Now when we give a visitor "the tour", we just say, "This is the guest bathroom, and (while reaching in and flipping it) the light switch is on the wrong side." No one has ever told us it was on the wrong side since!
Bill
I was at our local BJs today and noticed guy working in the
optical shop who was balding on top (noticably), but also had long hair down to his waist. and he isn't the only one with long hair.
There is another employee with a full head of hair that is also
down to his waist. Ultimately it is up to you how you wear your
hair but I vote for keeping it long.