new thread
Hello Hairy Dudes (including wannabe longhairs!),
I believe it's safe to say that the vast majority of men (maybe even as high as 99% of us) all started out as shorthairs. The lucky few males that started out their boyhood with such open-minded parents as to allow & encourage long hair on their male children, especially at a very early age, are extremely rare indeed (ahemmmm... Validus, I hope you're reading this)!
I think it's also quite safe to say that the average female throughout most of the world grows up with exactly the OPPOSITE experience -- for her, a young girlhood with long hair on her head is absolutely normal; so the first short haircut (if and when it happens), is quite a shock, maybe even a traumatic experience (unless of course this is totally her own choice).
If my statements above are correct, then it also stands to reason that the average male has quite a huge adjustment to have to make (emotionally, physically, and psychologically) if and when they choose to grow their hair long for the first time in their lives, no?
Let's talk just about the PHYSICAL adjustments, first:
1) if you've had very short hair for the majority of your life (up until now, for example), then the first time you experience your own hair falling into your eyes, blowing over your ears or tickling your neck in the wind, or getting caught in your mouth while you're trying to eat your soup, these are going to be HUGE new changes for you!!
2) as your hair gradually gets longer and longer (and THANK GOODNESS it's gradual), you're going to have even more weird new experiences, like: the first time your hair gets caught in a car door (because you slammed it shut before all of your hair got inside the car); or hearing your first complaint from somebody that just got slapped in the face when you unthinkingly flipped your hair back behind you while riding on the bus....
3) a windy day or doing a sweaty, dirty job will make you look like hell, more than you ever DREAMED you could look like hell...
4) your hair gets caught in a nice wicker chair, when you had no idea a chair could be so cruel...
5) you get invited to a nice wedding, and have to remind yourself that it's best to take that long hot shower with a thorough shampoo & conditioning, a full solid 2 hours earlier than you used to do (when your hair was short)!
.... And those are just a few of the PHYSICAL adjustments a longhair has to make!
So this post doesn't get too long-winded, for now, I won't even talk about all of the emotional and psychological adjustments a guy has to go through in order to successfully become a longhair -- unless, of course, you are one of those lucky teenagers who has/had supportive parents and encouraging friends, a non-conservative non-discriminatory school (devoid of old fashioned anti-longhair dress code rules), etc., etc., etc....
Oh, by the way: be careful of all of those pretty candles scattered all over the party house, young man -- and you with the butt-length hair, don't sit down in that seat over there without taking a closer look... there's a big wad of gum you're about to sit down on, and get it all stuck in your hard-earned hair!
- Ken
Actually when condition my hair (don't use shampoo now) it takes only a few minutes for my hair to dry. 10-15 minutes and it's dry.
After many years of riding the subway i've gotten into the habit of checking the seat out before I sit down. With many thousands of people riding the subway you never know what is on that seat that you're about to sit on. This also goes for seats on buses, in resteraunts, etc. And even with short hair this is stuff you don't want to be sitting in/on.
WOW, you must have a highly unusual type of hair! Even on a warm summer day, if I use conditioner only to wash my hair (which I often do also myself), I have to allow at least a full hour for it to air-dry (I never use blow-dryers, except in the extremely cold winter day situation).
I enjoyed reading this, please do continue talking in regards to the psychological and emotional changes, I would like to hear what you have to say.
Thanks.
I will, I promise! But for right now, unfortunately I need to get myself to work... I probably won't get around to writing that part until next week, since I stay overnight at my job in a little sleep-over room, not coming back home to my computer until Mon night or Tues.; but sometimes I use my boss's computer in his office, if I have some extra free-time that is.
Later!
I second that emotion, Ken... looking forward to your next installment.
Doesn’t this just strike a chord! After having been a short back ‘n’ sides boy in the 1960’s, I had shoulder length hair as a teenager in the 1970's, but a visit home to my parents also meant a visit to the barber! I went shorthaired at about 22 and very shorthaired in my 30's. So I am no exception.
It does take a lot of getting used to. It flies all over the place and tickles my face and neck – and I love it! That being said, I so look forward to being able to tie it back, for example when I go sailing, operate woodworking machinery or get into conservative company.
I am indeed grateful that this is a long and gradual process. It needs a lot of patience, but I’m in no hurry. I enjoy every stage of it. Indeed, long hair in dangerous when we try to combine it with machines, sailing boats, wicker chairs, car doors and many more instruments of torture! The headband is a godsend to an “awkward stager” like me. Even after ponytailing, there will still be loose hair and the front bang will take several years before it in its turn goes through the hair band with the queue.
Yes, do the least thing and combing my hair has to go from the tips, carefully teasing out the tangles. This happens when the hairs are more than 4 inches long. It is a satisfying stage, and I have come to enjoy combing my hair as I never did before.
My hairwash in the shower takes about 5 minutes, head down and water coming down from the back of the head. That included leaving the shampoo and then the conditioner long enough to do their work.
Psychological adjustments. I am basically a person who doesn’t care what others think and say about what I am or do (unless I have violated the principle according to which my freedom ends where another’s begins). I am a natural rebel and identify with the Romantic (in the old meaning of the word, as opposed to classical or rationalist) temperament – being a radical rather than a conservative.
Another word of warning: We are just about in barbecue season. Watch your hair and keep it away from the fire. Wear a cap or headband. Just make sure you don’t burn your hair! Just the same in the kitchen. Accidents happen so easily. We have to learn to be much more careful than when we were shorthairs.
These are words of wisdom indeed.
Anthony
My blog
Hello and thank you for this message. I appreciate it!
My parents have always encouraged me to have long hair and I have never been too short haired or with buzz cut. Started to grow it longer when I was 13 (from about 5 inches - 12-13 cm). My classmates also supported me. Today no one of my coworkers even asks me questions about this. Some of them talked to me because they have longhaired sons :)
My cousin also has long hair. His parents also support him.
Both of us are proud longhairs.
Ken,
You are, as usual, right on the mark with this subject. Newer growers almost always ask these questions right away because they don't know how to handle the new experiences. (I was there!). They are used to hair that doesn't move or poof out or get in their face.
Just keep growing, and things will always work out. This seems especially relevant as I have noticed quite a few new posters lately!
-Dan H.
Now, I haven't cut my hair for 16 months.
It's my first time trying to be an actual long hair. When I was 4 years old, I used to have long hair, past shoulder, but it was cut off some time after. Since then, I'd cut my hair every six months. When I was at that "six months stage", I used to feel like I had a "very long" hair. I enjoyed when it was winding, etc.
I wanted to have longer hair but I was afraid of being "bullied" at school, so I'd cut it short. Finally I managed to let my hair grow long ever since I entered the university, and it feels greater!
- Rogger
As usual a very entertaining and informative essay! I had to
learn the candle lesson the hard way which is why a portion
of my bangs are still about 8" shorter than the rest of my hair.
Thanks Ken! Feel free to post more ....
The Spaf Man
You made some good incisive points, Ken. Thanks for an excellent read.
I STILL love those sensations - not quite as much as when it was novel - but they still give me a thrill.
Haha! THAT sensation is not so much fun! Happens all the time to me coz I always wear my hair loose.
I notice a few young boys with long hair round here in my part of the UK but, yeah, most have short hair. If I see a pre-school kid with short cropped hair, I want to rush over to the parents and throttle them! Of course, it may really be the child's own choice but I still get annoyed!
Damon
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