new thread
Before I begin, this post may be fairly long, as I have lots of questions on the subject of having ones hair long. Please be patient and respond. Thanks!
Question 1: Does anyone else feel like they need to have their hair long?
Ever since I was about six, I have felt like long hair was a part of me, even though I've never grown it longer than my ears (not even over, just touching!). I hate having short hair, and whenever I get it cut, it's like someone just ripped off my hand or something. 10 years later, it's the same, And long hair is all I think about. Is this normal, to feel like without long hair, my soul is incomplete?
Question 2: How to get my parents to allow me to grow it long?
My original plan was to have them let me grow it so it covers my ears, and just slowly work my way to my ideal goal (just below the pecs), but anybody have a better plan?
Question three: should I start now or later?
(Obvious answer :))
Question four: Positive aspects of having long hair, just to know?
Thanks you guys!
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What you feel in regards to needing longhair to feel complete is what is know as being a Longhair. There is a big difference between having long hair, and being a Longhair. What you have desribed yourself as is you are a Longhair inspite of not having long hair. My feelings towards my hair are not unlike yours. It was the same when I was young many years ago myself. I don't know if such a feeling about hair as part of your/my soul is normal or not. I've never cared about what is 'normal' anyway. Normal is boring.
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Everyones milage will very. You know your parents best. In my case the thought of my dad allowing me to grow out my hair was unthinkable. I had to have a Navy approved haircut no matter how much I protested.
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That depends on question 2. While you are still a youth under your parents care your first responsibility is to your parents. Sometime we have to make great sacrifices to keep the peace. I wish you success in being allowed to start growing your hair now, but if not, it won't be too long before you are on your own anyway.
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Now that's a great question! One of which you will likely get more answers than you would ever imagine because each of us consider different aspects as our favorite aspects of having long hair.
Probably my favorite aspect of being a Longhair is I get to wear my hair different when ever I want. I can wear my hair loose, have a ponytail, or I can braid my hair. It could be one braid or multiple braids. It could be a normal ponytail, a segmented tail, a half tail, or any combination thereof. The possibilities are only limited by the limitations of your own imagination. Brushing my hair! I love brushing my hair. I enjoy feeling my hair as it lays or bounces on my back and shoulders. And one must not forget the attention of hairlovers. When you go by some young ladies and overhear, "Dayum! He has better hair than I do" it puts a spring in your step and a smile on your face.
No, thank you for asking and giving me the opportunity to answer. Welcome to the board.
Daniel
Dunno, since I've had control over the length it is has been long, but I can't imagine myself with short hair.
Can't help you with this one. I assume you have parents who are locked into ultraconservative gender image roles...count the years until you are in control of your body and life?
See 2. Also, how tolerant is your local social milieu? Jumping from the frying pan into the fire isn't a whole lot of fun.
Being more comfortable with yourself once you can match your inside with your outside. This should allow you to present to the world a more centered and balanced appearance.
Presenting an individual presence may or may not help you socially depending on how conservative and intolerant of diversity your area is.
Good luck!
During the 1960s I got lots of resistance from the schools I attended. I loved having long hair, I refused to cut it,
and my mom was supportive of how long my hair was. I thoroughly enjoyed bucking the system and keeping my long hair long.
Whether you start now or later, and how far you push it depends on your unique situation.
Yes. When I saw the Beatles on Tv in 1964 I knew I had to grow my hair long. So I did and the rest is history.
That depends on your parents. Some may allow it, others won't.
Some will absolutely not allow it, leaving you the only option of growing your hair out when you move out from under their roof.
See question #2.
For me I was born to have long hair. Cutting my hair would be akin to cutting off my left arm or right leg.
Let me say that above, "You asked the right question." Your asking it definitely proves you belong here, because many here have also, while it almost never occurs to people who feel otherwise.
Besides the "me too"s that you will surely get right now, you may want to read a document I wrote up over ten years ago that consolidated many of the questions that come up on here, and the questions you ask are covered there:
On Being a Longhair
As Bill said "Me too!" Ever since I was maybe 12 I felt I needed long hair. I grew longish hair occasionally but didn't acheive truely long hair until I was 42, so don't wait! (Answer to questions 1&3)
Having long hair will make you feel more complete and confident. You'll be happier! (Answer to question 4
)Convincing your parents may tough. Start with being polite and helpful. Don't wait for them to ask you to do something, just do it. Strive for the best grades in school. Do your homework without being nagged. Sounds tough but if you make your parents proud, the hair thing will be minor. (Answer to question 2)
Bruce
"Question 2: How to get my parents to allow me to grow it long?"
There's certainly no sure way to sell all parents on long hair, but I can give you some ideas that might improve your chances. When you're a kid parents feel they must be responsible for everything their kids do-- including getting haircuts. The more you can do to impress them with your responsibility-- across the board-- the more leeway they're likely to give you about such things as haircuts. You might try things like getting a good job, keeping a super neat room, doing chores around the home without asking and so forth. Hey, if they feel a bit endebted to you they may feel guilty about messing with you over hair.
As you grow your hair, keep it well trimmed and styled as neatly as possible all the time. I've found people are much more accepting of guys with long hair if they take care of well.
If they continue to give you grief over it, try to let them understand that it's something that means a lot to you and that forbidding it now will just make you more resentful of this time with them later because you're going to have long hair eventually anyway.
I never found a haircut that I liked, so I decided to not bother with haircuts at all and just simply grow it out long.
Depending on how much clothing you wear on the upper body, there are different ways of going about this:
Single layer (no jacket): wear it loose
Multiple layers: wear your hair in between your inner shirt layer (t shirt, polo, or dress shirt), and inside your sweater/jacket.
Cutting during the growth process isn't recommended by me. Don't bother trying to get it styled either. You'll look worst between months 5 and 9 -- afterwards, with a center part you will be able to get away with a mullet.
Also, sleep with your door locked (and maybe with a barricade), to eliminate the chances of a midnight haircut.
I personally was posting here for a year and a half before I finally permanently grew my hair out because of onerous school rules. Granted, I could have dropped out earlier, but I wanted to play it safe.
Leaving it loose looks cool and shades your neck. Also, with some volume and length, you may be able to hide your trapezius muscles, if you don't want to look imposing (although long hair with muscles is already quite a dominant look) -- or you can show them off by tying your hair back
A lot of us here feel the need to have long hair - it's not a passing fashion or a phase we are going through, but something important to us; part of our essential selves.
Most of us have experienced the disapproval of parents, friends, shcool and work pressures. For many of us it is only later in life that we have been able to make this choice for ourselves.
I suggest waiting for the time that is right for you. Don't deny the education or the work goals you might need for a successful life, but do plan for the time when you can be independent enough to make your own choices in life.
I was only able to have the hair I wanted when I was nearly 40 - but I have enjoyed all the journey since then. Hair growing is all about patience, after all.
Thanks you guys! Really appreciate the words of wisdom.
I have had the same feelings since the same age--as young as I can remember. But I was born too soon and had to wait for the Beatles to start the revolution that would make it possible to grow it out. Fought the family as some of my compatriots here had to do. Finally grew it out in college and never looked back. I am convinced that I was born that way and that has led me to believe that other attractions are also born-in.
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