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I have officially undergone my hopefully last hair trimming for the following few years!
It was truly a nerve wrecking experience and I felt my heart beating as we walked into the hair salon, especially considering it was a random one and I didn't personally know the stylist!
I went ahead and explained her that I am growing my hair long, and I want my back and sides trimmed to the same length as my front, with the front not being touched under and circumstances!
The hairdresser, was a real sweetheart and understood by my sweaty face that I was nervous and meant business, and took her time in acknoledging everything that I said, and then we were on our way...
The entire proccess and results can be seen here in the video linked to this post!
I know a lot of you will disagree with me, and say I should have left it all growing naturally, but I have to say I was always planning on trimming the back when I reach the 2 year mark in September this year, and I am very glad and relieved to have it behind me already, so that now I can say good bye and good riddance to hair salons and scissors for the next 3-4 years, and focus only on gainning and retaining length!
Here it is, if you feel like taking a look!
Thank you for the support, reinforcement and endless friendship, Jason... wouldn't be here if it wasn't for you, brother! :)
Hey Raul,
Well, in my completely unbiased opinion, I think it looks great! :)
Just to know that it's basically how you want it and you don't have to worry about future manipulation aside perhaps from micro-trimming for the ends way down the road.
There's no right or wrong way to grow out one's hair but I definitely feel there are merits to going the route you and I did.
I'm really looking forward to seeing your month to month progress. It's going to look amazing!! Onward and downward, my brother!
Jason
It turned out well. I had an 80's perm with layers when I grew my hair one length. The back was past my shoulders and I had to let my bangs grow out. I recall the summer of 1991 when my bangs where near my mouth. I had to use hair products and bobby pins to control it. By 1992 I had it trimmed to all one length.
Darrin
Thanks Darin!
It sounds like you got to where you wanted to be one step at a time, and as usual, there is no better way to get there than to be patient, just what I plan on doing :) And what I have been doing for the past 17 months already!
Appreciate your comment, brother!
Your welcome!
You did nothing wrong as you know. My point was that sooner or later you would had to trim it in order to get your hair to one length. I went through it, and all men and women with one length hair experience the same issue.
Darrin
My thought exactly. Thank you!
Hey Jason!
As I've already told you both on Facebook and YouTube, I honestly appreciate your help, support and advice with all my heart, and I am certain I will end up with a fantastic mane in the end, no matter what people think of my intentions.
Fact of the matter is, hair can be grown in different ways, and when I have such a great role model as yourself and your inspiring long hair journey, I think it's foolish to take my journey and intentions light hearted, but then again, people are set in their ways I guess.
Will be proud to keep growing my hair and showing the world exactly what marvelous mane manifests itself in the end :)
Yes, it is foolish to question your commitment to having long hair. You tried dreads and had a bad reaction to them and had NO CHOICE but to cut them off. It wasn't because you suddenly didn't want long hair. Similarly, cutting to all one length in NO WAY is indicative of not wanting long hair.
I can say with great certainty that there are few, if any, men who have wanted to have long hair more than I did. It's one of the reasons I left my religion AND the community that went with it! That's pretty serious stuff! Yet, I went the route of cutting the back to let the top/front catch up. Does that make me less of a longhair now OR then? I think not. Ignore the naysayers.
Well said, my friend!
Words to live by!
Let me begin by saying that of course you can have your own hair any way you want it. However, you repeatedly say you want LONG hair, and with your last pics you actually were BEGINNING to look as if you did have longish hair, BUT each time you get to this beginning point, it seems you look for and find a reason to Cut your hair. Your hair was looking very nice on you, but now you have medium to short hair hair again. I don't care what you do with it, but I feel by how you keep cutting it, you really like the idea of having different and constantly changing hairstyles, Not long hair. The trim you had could have been achieved at any point in the distant future, even though your hair would have accomplished the look you want all on its own. Further, you have really nice quality thick hair so why cut it? Oh well, I guess the answers to all this are in your head and that is Your Right. It just doesn't look to me by what you Do instead of what you say that you are in any hurry , if at all interested in Having truly long hair. But,whatever you decide I support your right to have it, Good Luck. SJ
I can totally understand why you would see my trim as a wish for having different hairstyles or a "no rush to get to long hair" attitude, though you would be very very wrong in your perception of reality, my friend.
Fact of the matter is, that I have been wanting all one length long hair from day one, and while for some of you having layered hair that gives the ILLUSION of the hair being longer than it really is, might be enough, it definitely wasn't enough for me.
The fact that the front hair blended with the sides and back in certain lighting and made it look longer than it really was, didnt make it any longer than it truly is, which is exactly the length I am sporting right now.
To further that point, I have looked up to Jason and his method of growing his hair out from the beginning, and while you are certainly very entitled to your opinion, I want to make it clear that if you are deciphering my behaviour as "fligy" or "not serious enough" you are in the wrong.
I am growing my hair more seriously than any time before, and I see this as another milestone, not a setback at all.
I guess there is no better proof than keeping growing my hair and in a few years time, reminding you how all of this was part of the plan, and how great it all turned up in the end.
Thanks for your opinion, either way :)
Exactly. The illusion was there of having longer hair but the fact of the matter is that your front/top hair wasn't touched and that was truly how long your hair was before.
The way I've always seen it, buddy.
I am close to chin length, that is what I have been saying all along. That has not changed, not one bit!
not that it matters, but in Fact, the hair was no illusion, it had grown, it was evident and about 8 months worth of growth, which looked long and Was that long. (time based on what Raul said was appox. 4inches),Again, it is all his decision, but a hairCut is a hairCut, and 4inches is a lot. We advise men on here all the time to persevere and let it grow out.So, if Raul wants a "bob" style cut, I am all for it, but it is significantly shorter and looks it-not in real keeping with the site, but Again, I really don't care about that. It is his choice. --- to have short hair for now. Best to all.
You seem to draw some sort of pleasure in underlining your desire to call my hair short... is that some sort of way to make youself feel better about yourself?
Hasn't your mother ever taught you that if you've got nothing nice to say, better say nothing at all? Not quite sure where all this negativity is coming from, don't think I've ever warranted that, correct me if I am wrong.
I did not wish for a bob haircut, it's simply what I had to get now in order to grow my hair out the way *I* want to grow it long. Goal is still midback at least, and no matter how many times you doubt me, it will not change that goal.
I suggest you do some soul searching and try to find what is it that irks you so bad in your real life, that you find the need to lash out like this on a fellow long hair enthusiast, and cr@p all over their experience.
Either way, you know what they say about opinions. Just like some other certain body parts, we've all got one.
Good day :)
As I said at the onset, I don't care if you cut your hair, shave it all off or not. And, I don't. But this is a site where we encourage Growing hair out, and many members have been chastised in the past for dwelling on cutting and so forth. So, for me, in honoring the mission of the site,I don't see the need to record and show hairCuts. As for you, if you want it cut, I dont' care. I said it before and meant it. As for my opinions, they are every bit as valid as yours, and in relation to your last crass and over personally attacking statement, yes we All have them, you included.
You reap what you sow, sir.
Learn to treat people with respect if you want to be shown respect back.
So you're planning to not getting a trim for 3-4 years? I would highly recommend against that. Everyone's hair gets a little damage along the way (spit ends, etc.) and there is not such thing as "repairing" hair once it is damaged. In 4 years, you might end up taking off quite a bit of hair to cut off accumulated damage.
Why not have dusting trims along the way to keep in healthy during the entire growing process and end up overall trimming less?
In addition, you seem to like it all one length. Your hair does not all grow at the same rate, so it will soon not be "all one length".
I got about 1/8" trimmed every 12 weeks during the 3.5 years it mine to get waist length. It worked out great and I had healthy hair during the entire growing process.
The key is to find a trusted stylist and ONLY go to her.
I think your hair looks great, but you probably didn't need that much trimmed off to get the result your were seeking.
I wish you luck in achieving your ultimate goal!
Hey Sunsailng!
When I was talking about no trims for the next upcoming years, I meant no serious trims length wise. Of course, a few tenths an inch now and then to keep the ends healthy is something I am planning to do!
Sounds as if it worked great for you, and I definitely am planning on doing something rather similar in the future!
While the hair isn't at perfectly one length now either, it doesn't really have to be. The difference before this cut was alongside 4 inches or so. Now, if with a difference of 1/3 an inch or so, its plently close to being one length to me :)
Thanks for the constructive input, buddy! Appreciate it!
Hi Raul,
It was interesting viewing that video, with the stylist working your hair over, but it does look like she was respectful of your hair. You could have ended up with a run of the mill old man's hair cut.lol.I'm not going to second guess your decision like I did when you announced going for dreadlocks way back when.That was a different story from what you did now.Only time will tell if your trim will get the results you are hoping for.I would have grown my hair longer before any substantial trim but that's only my opinion.You seem to know what you want at this juncture so lets wait and see.As always its your hair and your right to pursue the longhair dream in your own way.Your so lucky to have the resources today to seek advice on this process whereas I had to go it alone.There was no internet back in my day and few longhairs to look up to in real life.Makes me wonder how I ever survived the journey back then to get to where I am today.I wish you success with your dreams to become the longhair of your liking:)Cheers my friend...
Mârk
Hi Mark!
I have to tell you, this comment really warmed my heart and reminded me so well why I started posting here in the first place. Really appreciate your honesty, but most of all, your kindness in expressing yourself. That is something that we should always show eachother I feel, respect and kindness.
You are completely right, I am in a completely different mindset now, and even though last time with the derads things didn't go as planned, I have thought this through long and hard and it's all part of my long hair journey, not an obstacle or a setback at all, definitely what I have planned on doing all along.
I am truly lucky in having both this board, Jason's blogg, other esablished longhairs on YouTube (like you, CEM) and countless other resources, to be able to draw inspiration, ask for advice and follow a path that has already been walked by others.
All that much more respect to you for having done this long before the internet was ever thought of ;)
Hope you keep following, Mark... I am still only in the beginning of my journey, and I am definitely having a clear goal in mind!
Thanks again, brother!
Hey Raul,
I'm definitely looking forward to your journey as it unfolds this time around.As you know the process is slow but hey, perfection takes time right?I do feel bad there was negativity about your journey here but its only an opinion that you have the right to discount.Just go with your heart and savor the results my friend.Cheers
Mârk
You obviously did what you think is right. It's a free world and we all either intervene and "tend the garden" or let nature take its course. My wife would love me to have the "pageboy" style on pretext that it would look thicker. I have always refused, preferring to let it grow for at least 2 to 3 years before doing little more than trim split ends as they occur.
Feye's Hair Self-Trimming Instructions
My wife occasionally has her hair done by a long-haired male hairdresser in the city where she works. I am so wary of professional hairdressers. They take pride in their work, but often value their own tastes and technique over the customer's wishes that they might perceive as poor taste. "The customer is always right", but that's not always easy for an artist!
It is also something cultural. We all have different cultural references, and long hair means different things to each of us. To some it is head-banging heavy metal, to others other styles of classical or modern music, the 1960's. I have made of mine an inner rejection of modernity, or at least its dehumanization. I have no tattoos or beard, but I have no problem with those who have them. We need to tolerate each other.
Now the deed is done, I look forward to seeing how your hair will grow over the next year or two. I think it will look very good. Keep us all posted.
Anthony
Dear classmate of September 13' :)
I know you have always expressed your wish to grow you hair all natural as nature has intended, and see where it takes you, and I have nothing but the upmost respect for you for that.
You wive wanting you to "tidy up" your hair is something completely different, and was I put in such a situation I would notice the subtle neuance of being pressed to have shorter hair, and would never do this. That is what made this easy for me, it was my choice and as a part of my journey down my back. Not as a style I am planning on sporting anymore than the net 4-6 months while it grows towards my shoulders!
You are completely spot on with hair dressers and stylists, and I would know, seeing as I had dated a couple of them. Lovely laides, but as you say, they are all about technique, trends, art and their vision, and they very often do what's "best looking" rather than what the client actually asks for!
That guide looks nifty! Good to have for future reference!
Thanks for the understanding, and I hope you see your hair keep on growing, it looks lovely already! :)
Many thanks for your kind words, Raul. I noticed the sayings of one of your critics who showed intolerance about your choice and suggesting you had no place on this forum. I am disheartened at the way people in this world becomes intolerant about hair, let alone religion and politics! There is nothing wrong with people's choices, and that is something I love about MLHH. We are all so different, but yet encourage each other and show friendship and humanity in a bleak world.
Yes, indeed, your choice is well reasoned out, and your hairstyle will be wonderful in a year's time - getting back what was cut and then your increasing length. I doubt myself that I would go to terminal length for practical reasons, and I am presently looking at something like Jason's length (half or three-quarter back). I would be going progressively from layered to single-length in the process. That's a couple of years away.
Having a clear idea enables us to resist the suggestions of wives and others to cut or style our hair the way they want. I certainly want the kind of hair that flows, can be ponytailed, put in a bun or braided. Presently, I can ponytail almost everything, and my awkward stage is living its last days.
Going by the video of you at the hairdresser, you have given yourself another six months of awkward stage, but those months will pass quickly. You were lucky to find a (female) hairdresser with a degree of sympathy. Women's attitudes to long-haired men can be unpredictable. There is the cultural aspect I mentioned in my other reply. We have such different images of self, even if there are things in common like going for long hair.
When I first joined this board, I looked at the links from "Links" at the top of this page. I discovered Jason's amazing history and carefully documented blog. I was intrigued by the self-trimming page, but I have never had hair long enough for that. It has to be long enough to be brought round over the shoulders to the front after careful combing and central parting, and then dealt with painstakingly so as to obtain a perfectly symmetrical result when the hair goes back its natural way. I would prefer the rounded or pointed style than the straight-across, but that is a matter of taste. That is more than 2 years away for me, except split end hunting and destroying.
The adventure continues for us all, even those who have achieved terminal length, because they have to maintain what they have and care for it. It is fascinating how many different ways can be used for that!
Anthony, I really enjoy your eloquent way with words. We do all come at our long hair journeys from different places and we donÂ’t all share the exact same goals. What does bind us is that we have hair that is much longer than the established norms of what society might dictate for males. We all have faced or could potentially face intolerance and itÂ’s nice to have the MLHH as a haven for support.
The vast majority of members here are tolerant of how others approach the growing process. ThereÂ’s plenty of room for giving opinions without doing so in a caustic and belittling way.
I very much look forward to following both your journey and RaulÂ’s and suspect that your heads of hair may look very similar in three years or so. You may take slightly different paths to get there but itÂ’s all good and I donÂ’t doubt the sincerity or determination of either of you.
I have officially undergone my hopefully last hair trimming for the following few years! ... I know a lot of you will disagree with me, and say I should have left it all growing naturally, but I have to say I was always planning on trimming the back when I reach the 2 year mark in September this year, and I am very glad and relieved to have it behind me already, so that now I can say good bye and good riddance to hair salons and scissors for the next 3-4 years, and focus only on gainning and retaining length!...
Hi Raul - loved the video: ( music & quality was awesome ) ... I've always loved your clarity of thought & ability to decide, act, do & follow-through - very important qualities, that will see you well in your long-haired journey of life - you do brave things ... ( your like a chameleon currently ... ever-changing, dramatic & zesty = beard on, beard off, Viking photo-shoot, salon trim to bob-style - very entertaining ... & I respect these qualities very much + there is always '1001 ways to skin a cat' - & all our journeys will be unique, different & varied ... but in no way is any one journey more important than the next ... you rock & don't stop being you - brave & fearless cheers bud CEM. ~:0)~
I've said it many times before, my good friend.... beards come and go, but long hair is forever :)
Appreciate your support and looking forward to more videos in which you talk about being a longhair, the mentality, the difficulties, the feeling of accomplishment... everything that you can bestow upon us on the journey!
Love your brushing videos, but nothing like a good narrative to truly inspire, bud!
Thank you!
Hi Raul - thanx. for your sound advice - it never falls on deaf ears ... we are very good examples of how to get to the same goal in very different ways ... 1stly: = you have very dark hair / & mine is very blond. 2ndly: = you like all one length / bob style & I like layers / mullet style / 'V-shape' / whispy/angel-fairy-tale-ends: ( like Kenny's ). & 3rdly: = you like to trim & I do not trim & have not done so in 4. years: ( although I did trim & layer for the first 18. months, to create the layered mullet-style in the first place - my hair now really is just a grown-out mullet ) ... so therefore there is no right or wrong here / no right way or wrong way ... just different, unique & with personal preferences & these preferences will dictate our chosen path, both in growing long hair & in life itself ... but at the end of the day our results will be similar: ( if not the same ) - the only real difference being, is just that one took the high road & one took the low road - but at the tavern, by a crackling fire, drinking beer, we sit ... I have long hair now & you will have long hair in the fullness of time - it's the journey that matters - much love & respect to you ... I'm enjoying viewing your journey very much cheers CEM. ~:0)~
I don't see this as clarity of thought I see it as not being comfortable in your own skin. First it was long hair - cut, then beard - cut, then dreads -cut, now hair again. Each time you rushed for a result quicker than nature allows, you need to chill and stick to a plan Raul.
I hope you find what makes you really happy
Dave
Hi Raul,
Although she ended taking off a little bit more than I expected, the good thing is that she got it very close to all one length, with the front only about 1 inch shorter than the back now. I agree with you and Jadon, and I definitely favour the one length look as well, since it makes your hair looks thicker, and it is easier to work with.
Now that the scary job is behind you, it should be smooth sailing from this day forward, and I will share your excitement as you journey forwards, and downwards.
Take care, and good luck with the future growing,
David
David!
I am glad to see there are others who favor this approach to growing long hair, and understand the reasons behind doing this and sacrificing some length!
Greatly appreciate your comment and support, and thank you for all the motivation throughout the years I have been a member here on the mlhh :)
Hey Raul!
Your hair is looking great :) Been watching your youtube videos for some time, and they inspire me a great deal.
I just put my first update here couple days ago if you want to check it out :)
-Tommi
Please don't think this question is a criticism -- I'm just sincerely curious - and sorry if I missed the explanation somewhere along the way - can someone explain the case for wanting all one length?
I know the advantages of some layering/thinning- not as thick/dense/blocky - more texture, more movement and life and shape - no need to create and endure a "page boy"/bob stage - lays better, dries quicker - for many, looks better - Aragorn, for example, obviously isn't in the all-one-length camp, and he's one good-looking longhair. So what are the counterbalancing advantages thought to be for all-one-length? Is it mainly just about less "maintenance"?
Long before I was an active member here, I had to figure out on my own what I most wanted re. my own hair. Yes, it's true what they say around here: the more often you cut (even if just a light trim), the longer it will take to achieve truly looooooong hair.
But, so what? The journey is just as important as the end result, isn't it? If we can't enjoy the journey along the way (just like a road trip: stopping to enjoy the beautiful vistas or exploring some scenic hidden little town, beach, or canyon); then all we are doing is RACING to some "all-important" finish-line...
The first time I grew my hair long (during the '90s), AND also the 2nd time I grew my hair back (after my devastating Y2K haircut), in both cases I had frequent professional trims along the way -- less so the 2nd time around; but still, I wanted to trim and re-shape my hair as it was growing out.
Nowadays I no longer go to professional hairstylists; but that is my current choice, because am enjoying the experience of terminal length (AKA "fairy tale ends").
I think the blunt-cut looks cool -- although I personally have always chosen a V-shaped cut in back myself, regardless of whether long or short or in-between!
Your hair is going to grow out hands-down TERRIFIC-looking, and I have no problem whatsoever with your video of the trimming process, it was actually very interesting to watch!!
Take Care -- and happy hair-farming!
- Ken
PS - I meant to also say that normally hair-cutting videos completely turn me off, especially if they involve someone chopping off beautiful long hair (whether male or female), suddenly resulting in short.... Buzz-cuts are even worse for me, since I was forced into having them myself when I was a kid, my dad being the hair-butcher.
In fact, I hate those kind of videos so much that I refuse to watch any of them. But honestly, your video was just fine, I had no negative emotional reaction watching the entire thing whatsoever, go figure!
... Just thought you might enjoy hearing that comment!
- Ken
Hi there Ken
Sorry to ask you, but I've always reading posts from you related to that "Disastrous Y2K haircut", could you tell me what exactly happened about it? You went for a trim and they've chopped more inches that you didn't want to? Sorry if I asked too much, I'm a bit curious.
No problem, I'm happy to answer your question!
My disastrous Y2K haircut was no one's fault but my own: I was going through a lot of "mid-life crisis issues" at the time. It was as if one day I loved my long hair (it had gotten to waist-length by 1999 and 2000), and then one day I woke up and hated it, impulsively deciding to cut it back to short (thinking this would somehow "solve" my many mid-life crisis issues)...
After the haircut, once I had fully realized what I'd done, I was totally devastated -- I had spent 9 long years patiently growing my hair out, only to have it all cut off in less than an hour in the hair-stylist's chair.
It was as if I "took it out" on my hair, rather than trying to deal with my real problems; but there was nobody to be truly angry at, other than myself for doing this unfortunate evil deed... But, I learned a lot of valuable lessons from the experience; so that was the good that came from it. (Plus hair grows back, thank goodness!)
... A good example why MLHH's "2-week rule" is good common sense advise to follow!
- Ken
This story sounds quite a lot like my own decision to grow my hair. My hair was shoulder length when I was about 21, and then I "converted" to conservative Roman Catholicism => short hair plus some pressure from my parents. I had been through a bad time in my life.
Long hair for me has been symbolic of turning back to other times in my life, except that nothing is the same (it can't be). You are so right about the two-week rule, so that we don't commit a "crime de passion".
To me, short hair, especially the way I had mine over the years represented an attempt to hide or crush my personality in favour of the Church. I am still a priest, but my Bishop is very tolerant (he has a beard) and I live things in a very new way.
Things can happen very suddenly and unpredictably in our minds, and we have to be clear about forcing ourselves to take time before making a decision, and only doing so when we are calm and truly ourselves. I fully understand what kind of impulse would have pushed you to have your hair cut.
Anthony
Hi Raul.
I also wanted to have my back & sides at the same length as my front....but I waited that my front was much longer....25 months after starting to grow my hair from very short. Attached was the result of that major "trim"...shoulder length, 28 months ago. Now, if you scroll down a little bit, you'll see the result 28 months after that major trim: mid-back length and in great condition.
Check it out. Hope you'll follow up and get great hair also!
A.D.
It'll be easier to compare the 28 month progress (one length) by simply posting the picture here!!!
I think that your hair looks cool after the trim. Of course I
prefer the one length blunt cut type style that Jason has and
would have (and actually have) done the same type of trim you
just did. And despite the comment you put on the video I thought
that your hair looked really good after the blow drying.
Hi Raul,
Thanks for posting this video! Now your hair can grow out better and more evenly. I always enjoy your videos and always look forward to the next one! That lady was making me wonder if she would stop cutting! Looks like she did a great job and you will be happy with the results I'm sure! Please keep it growing and stay well my friend!
Ted