new thread
I have seen and replied to two persons talking of having their hair cut. Is it really germane to this forum? If someone decides to have his hair cut, they are free to do what they want. Is it necessary to ask our advice.
I used to cut my hair short. The idea now seems gruesome to me, and without doubt to most of us.
I have the feeling that it is like asking a pig what he thinks of sausages! This forum is about those of us who have a long-haired life style regardless of our cultural references
Anthony
LOL, pigs probably don't like the idea of a ham & cheese omelettes either!
Over the years here, some guys who visit MLHH need a little encouragement and maybe even a good old-fashioned "pep talk", advising them against cutting; but yeah, what the heck do they think a group of longhaired dudes are going to say? "You'd look terrific with a buzz-cut?" No, that's just not going to happen here. This is the men's LONG HAIR hyperboard, not the "men's whatever-lenght-we-advise-you hyperboard".
... 'Nough said!
- Ken
You show me someone who comes on this board and wants to cut their hair and i'll show you someone who lovws short hair and wants to bait us long haired guys.
They might be looking for encouragement but my money would be
short hair enthusiasts looking to bait us.
I may have been at night but I wasn't born last night.
I don't know about anyone else, but I didn't need encouragement to grow my hair long, Seeing the Beatles in 1964 and other rock
stars later in the 1960s were all the encouragement I needed. Seeing them lit a fire that gave me the burning desire to have long hair. After all these years i've never had the desire to cut my hair. (Although in the 1980s it was knee length and I fett that was too long so I cut it back to waist length.)
So my money is on the hair cutters being trolls.
Oh, you had a knee length hair! My God, it is awesome!
I think we are all agreed about supporting each other and that we are all free in our choice. At the same time this is a forum for those of us who freely grow our hair.
Another analogy comes into my mind, asking the Rabbi what he thinks about eating pork or what the army thinks about long hair. I do think that those who want to cut their hair should exercise their freedom and not bother us with it. Likewise with a Jewish person who wants to change his religion or eat pork or a soldier who wishes to leave the army and grow his hair. The former isn't going to bother his local synagogue community and the latter isn't going to bother his commanding officers!
I think most of us know what we want in life, hair-wise and everything else in life. We are responsible adults and do what is right for us. It is not easy for beginners. I was one not very long ago, and MLHH has been a great encouragement for me. You and I are of a certain age, and others are much younger, subjected to pressure from family and colleagues at work. This is a forum of long hairs, and we are not going to encourage hair cutting. We don't oppose anyone's freedom.
We do need to encourage people to have the strength of their convictions and desires. I think we are certainly agreed in the spirit of this forum and its aim of encouraging men to grow their hair if they have made that choice.
Anthony
I think you're right, Ken. They just need some encouragement to keep growing. It's a nice thing to offer the encouragement! That's one of the reasons why I visit this board.
A lot of us struggle with societal norms and expectations, or maybe low self esteem, lack of self confidence. Encouragement and kind words always help.
I only think about cutting my hair whenever someone nags me about it. A fraction of a second goes by and I chuckle briefly and ignore them and they go away. I realize my hair doesn't look all that great but I like it and at 61 years old I could care less what others think. I only wish I let it grow years ago.
Oy, lighten up, guys! :-) Maybe in asking, the individuals in question are simply looking for encouragement to keep growing. There are so many social pressures and cues that conspire to get us to wear our hair shorter. Especially for those who are new to long-hairdom, it can be difficult to withstand all these pressures.
The subtler pressure "it will be more comfortable in the hot weather" is certainly one of them. An the statement is patently false. In hot weather, if you feel overly hot wearing your hair loose, you tie it back and get on with your life. But several members of the forum here have attested that they normally wear their hair loose, even in the summer. It certainly seems to be a matter of personal preference, period.
As I've mentioned along the way, my approach to hair care is a little more "hands-on" than Anthony's. I've trimmed uneven ends here and there as my hair has grown inexorably longer. I would have been 'farther along' had I resisted the temptation. But my hair keeps growing even so, and I enjoy the occasional pampering of a trim to go with my regular colouring. I think that mostly, I enjoy going into a salon and choosing what is going to happen there now that I'm no longer worried about conforming to someone else's vision of how my hair should look. It's empowering! I served 28 years in the military where I had only a narrow range of choices as to how to wear my hair. I don't regret my service, but now that it's over, i am enjoying the freedom that comes with my status now.
Nu, keep it growing and flowing...as YOU choose!
Don
BTW concerning Anthony's assertion regarding telling a rabbi that you want to eat pork. Since I AM a rabbi...
There's a tongue-in-cheek instruction that appears in the Babylonian Talmud twice regarding one who is tempted to transgress God's Law. It is actually expressed in terms of unspecified sexual improprieties, but i can apply it to this as well. The sages counseled that one who feels an overpowering urge to commit an offence that goes against the community's norms, should simply dress in mufti and go to a town where they're not known, and get it out of their system. So if a Jew came to me expressing an urge to taste pork, I would tell them to drive up the road, find a quiet little cafe, and eat to their heart's content. Obviously, the advice would not apply to someone feeling an urge to commit an ethical offence; THAT urge I would tell them to fight with all their strength. :-)
Be well...
Don
I hope I wasn't offensive in any way. Since my days in East London, I have had a tremendous amount of esteem for Jewish people, your sense of fidelity to God, family and hard work. We tell many jokes about Rabbis and Catholic priests in railway carriages!
The principle you mention is obviously a wise one, that of getting things out of one's system so that we can get on in life and our spirituality.
May God's peace be with you, Don.
Anthony
No offense taken at all, Anthony! Yes, I know a few Rabbi-Priest jokes too! My first boss in the Air Force chaplaincy was a Catholic Priest and we had a great time together. Thanks for the kind words and all the best...
Don
Hey Anthony,
I am probably one of the posters who mentioned thoughts of cutting my hair a few days ago. All I did was expound a feeling I've been thinking amongst a community of fellow longhairs, which I've lurked around for years. Considering I don't know any other men (in person) with long hair, I didn't necessarily have anybody else to broach my thoughts to. I wasn't sure if my thoughts were common among others who grow out their hair, or if/how others get passed these feelings of hair cutting. So I think it's perfectly germane. When I do mention the idea of cutting to my (in person) friends, the usual response I get is "go for it!" or "yeah, you can donate it!"
The responses I found here were a bit more varied: some dismissive of ever cutting for any reason, some encouraging to do what I want, some even a bit fear inducing (warning that I'd only regret it). The idea that I would cut off hair that I've grown out over 3 years in a 10 minute cut, with little consideration for the style or myriad options to cut long hair down to, is a bit extreme. I've been considering cutting back the length to my shoulder, which is still considered long by the mainstream male/fashion community, but maybe not LOOOOONG by the MLHH community.
I still stand by original (self) observation, that growing and seeing my hair gradually reach my neck, shoulders, obtain a ponytail length, tie up into a bun length, was more enjoyable than where I'm at now. This can also be symptomatic of feeling the need for a greater change in my life or feeling bored (with things greater than hair...)
So, at the end of this ramble, I conclude that its not akin to asking pigs about sausage. I do don't cease to exist with shorter hair, just my look changes. It's closer, say, to asking a sheep's opinion about harvesting their wool. The sheep is still a sheep even after being shorn. Although, some of the initial responses have made me consider that maybe I do not tie my identity to my long hair enough to truly fit in here. Although I am a man with long hair, and have gone through many periods of growing and maintaining long hair, I've also realized I am not interested in growing to terminal length and that I have reached a point where my hair is long enough, or perhaps longer than I want.
Gram
I didn't want to be dismissive or abusive. It is true that I had a hard day yesterday for reasons closer to home!
It was certainly exaggerated to compare a man having his hair cut to a pig being slaughtered for its meat! Sometimes we do get exasperated because the pressure in society is to conform to a short hair standard. I have no personal experience with trolls on this subject, and I don't think you are one - with this explanation.
Certainly, you are free to do as you want - go to the other extreme or somewhere in between. Truth to be told, none of us can give you advice because we don't know you or the life you lead. That is the problem of the internet.
Yes, you can go in stages. A hair stylist would be the best one to ask if you trust him / her. That person would go from your physical morphology, your style of life, cultural references, etc. We can't.
I wish you all the best in life and the wisest choice for you for your appearance and your general well-being.
Anthony
It's the same arriving at the buzzboard (if this still exists, old members know very well about that board) and asking assistance for proceeding in the long hair journey...
BUT, there are some other guys that arrive here and have that "haircutting" fetish and start asking randomly about that in this board and beware, more than 1 decade has passed and the trolls never stops in this board.
Take care my friend!
There are vegetarian sausages, of course, but maybe that's like asking longhairs what they think of wigs...
It's their choice, as you say, if people decide to fall off the longhair wagon, but others feel the need of support to keep their hair and swim against the tide. They my talk about changing their minds about long hair, but they might not want to admit to giving in to pressure. So I feel those posts are OK.
One or two of them might be ok, when you get more than that it starts to smell like trolls from the buzz crowd.
I never had second thoughts about growing my hair. Every time someone complained about my hair I took as an incentive to let it grow longer. I thrived on those complaints and proceeded to not only keep it long but to let grow longer.
Also cutting my hair off would be akin to cutting off an arm or a leg. Even when I have to trim off the ends I hate doing it even though I also hate the way the ends look.
Although not every guy is cut out to withstand the massive pressure to go with short hair.