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Friends and fellow members of MLHH,
It was with great sadness that we learned this morning that Bill Choisser passed away last night. Longtime members know Bill well. My first post at MLHH was way back in 1999 but Bill was with this site from its inception. Not only that, but he wrote most of the code for the site’s operations both for the board itself and the behind-the-scenes parts.
Bill was a remarkable engineer and extremely smart with computers. In fact, Bill was pretty much smart at everything. His writing was amazing, impeccable with perfect grammar and spelling, but it went well beyond that. He wrote in such a way to reach the heart and soul of men for whom having long hair is very important. His seminal treatise “On Being a Longhair” found in the Links section, remains the best guide for such men. It speaks to all men with this interest but it especially is geared to those of us with longhair identities. Such men simply do not feel whole without having long hair and as a born longhair himself, Bill could relate in a special way. This document has been translated into several languages.
Bill had his own battles before he finally could become his full self and grow out his hair. On a personal level, this meant so much to me as I was born into a high-control organization that hates longhairs. I suffered considerable angst as I wrestled with my longhair identity while also being so indoctrinated with other beliefs. Bill and I shared many an email as he helped me to see that God couldn’t possibly be so petty.
Bill served as one of the first moderators at the site before the moderators were even named. Bill then set up guidelines when the level of activity at MLHH warranted a group of named moderators. He continued to serve not only as a moderator but also the tech crew chief responsible for keeping MLHH running. He helped us deal with many technical issues that those of us without deep knowledge of computers and code would know nothing about.
It was an honor to finally meet Bill in December 2014. My family was visiting San Francisco and I was able to meet Bill, his partner Larry and Ken. We first met at a park and then walked to a restaurant for lunch. We kept on a walking tour of other parts of the city before finally stopping at his house. Bill was in pretty good health at that point having mostly recovered finally from a very serious health scare that first occurred in 2006. In the months after I saw him, Bill reported being able to walk long distances again. Unfortunately, this good health was not to stay his for very long.
I’d like to pass along my condolences to his partner Larry and the many friends of his who are mourning the loss of this great man.
The attached photo is from that day I met Bill in San Francisco.
Jason
On Being a Longhair
Thank you for sharing that, Jason. I wish to express my condolences to all who knew him.
Hi Jason and all fellow members of the community. I learned early this morning that Bill had passed away after a long period of illness. It really hits home since Bill and the mlhh were joined at the hip until he retired from his duties here a couple years ago.Without Bill I have no idea what the mlhh would have looked like or if it would even had survived all these years.He put so much of his time into making this community work. I'm grateful to have gotten to know Bill personally over the years by visiting him whenever I went out to California.Anyone who had the privilege to meet Bill knows he's a solid person.As in life, change happens to all of us until our time is up.I know I'll never forget Bill and all that's he's done.Keeping the faith.........
Márk
Beautifully written post, Jason, and what a great loss to our community. I went with Larry to the hospital to see Bill a couple of weeks ago, and even though he was physically going through quite an ordeal there (fighting as best he could his rare muscle disease, and the painful deterioration that came with it), his spirit and his humor remained strong. I am heart-broken.
At a time like this, words just don't seem to come to me. The many times that I enjoyed visiting Bill & Larry at their house, -- something not many people can actually say over the internet! -- it's now hard for me to think about not being able to see Bill anymore.
I'm including a pic that Bill's long-time life partner and husband Larry took, back in Sept. of 2013, when Mark ("Hairball") came out West for a visit. The 4 of us took a hike through San Francisco's Golden Gate National Recreation Park, including walking across the Golden Gate Bridge to the mid-way point. It was a terrific day, a fun time, and a joy to remember... Bill, wherever you are right now, I know you gladly left that hospital bed far behind, and are back to your love in life of hiking in the great outdoors!
With a hell of a lot of tears,
Ken in San Francisco
I am indeed very saddened by Bill's passing. I have know Bill since 1992, and he was indeed a very compassionate and caring friend and gentle spirit. We shared the affinity for being long-haired men, amateur radio, photography, and other interests. I visited the home he shared with his spouse Larry, and enjoyed his humor and conversation at the annual autumn gatherings of long-haired guys in San Francisco when I could attend. He will be sorely missed by all who knew him. He made the world a better place for all of us.
What's your callsign? Mine is N3KIP (or G8VUK in England, where I originally come from).
Mine is AE7CG. I am on 20M and 15M CW only, and 2M FM/RPTR.
73!
I am not a CW man myself. I passed the 20 wpm to get my Extra, but have never actually operated CW, strictly phone, although that includes SSB and FM on HF, VHF and UHF.
Recently I have got onto DMR, which is a digital voice mode used on 2m and UHF repeaters that are linked to eachother around the world through the Internet.
I hope for my next endeavour to be trying FreeDV, which is a digital voice mode used on HF. It is a little more than half the bandwidth of SSB, which in theory should give it better signal to noise performance, but I am curious how it really compares with SSB, as digital signals don't degrade gracefully.
When digital voice signals are weak, hams call the resulting effect R2D2ing, using a Star Wars analogy.
I never met Bill, and it is too late now. He shared with me his life's story, as well as his wedding pictures when he and Larry got married at San Francisco City Hall, his account of their epic road trip across the US on route 66, and his pictures from ham radio field day with the San Francisco chapter of the Lambda Amateur Radio Club.
Like Sugarcane and Bill himself, I am also a radio ham. In addition to that, it seems as if Bill and I were following similar career patterns, but in reverse. He was a lawyer in his father's firm and gave that up to become an engineer, whereas I was an engineer who went into the law to become a patent agent.
I will miss him.
Not what I expected visiting this site again after a long time.
I wouldn't go as far as to say that I really knew Bill despite the interesting conversations I had with him on this site and the details about his personal life he shared with us, but I do know enough about him to say that he was a great man who helped many others.
Through his guide I found my way here and received a lot of support from this small group of awesome men in many different ways.
I couldn't ever thank him and the rest of you guys enough and now I won't even get the chance to do so. It's a damn shame.
I'm not completely sad, though. It's great to know that he got to live a pretty cool life, despite his childhood being pretty horrible.
It's great to know that he won't be forgotten, even by people like me who never met him.
RIP Bill
Hi Jason,
Thank you so much for sharing such a beautifully written post about Bill, who has done so much over the years to make this the wonderful community that it is. I only wish that I was as fortunate as you in having had the opportunity to meet Bill in person, but unfortunately, it is now too late. I guess that I still haven't had the chance to make that trip to the west coast of the USA.
Of course, my heart goes out to his partner, Larry and all those who were so close to Bill, and this is indeed a huge loss for everyone on the MLHH.
David
Dear Jason,
Thanks so much for this well-written eulogy for Bill. You should know Bill would be proud of you.
Oh Bill. I didn't know you long enough and hadn't ever met you in person unfortunately. But through your generous articles and photos of you and Larry's trips I feel I had met you. You should know that I thoroughly enjoyed viewing your photos and reading your informative articles. I will be forever thankful to you for everything you did to keep MLHH going and fun to visit.
May you always Rest in Peace my friend! I am comfortable in knowing you are no longer in pain and are keeping a watchful eye on your spouse Larry and us here at the MLHH. I shall always keep you in my heart and will have a big smile on my face when I think of you! Godspeed my friend! You will definitely be sorely missed!
Ted
I was going to say 'saddened' but that word is so inadequate. I was actually shocked and sickened to hear of this from Mark's post on Facebook. I only knew Bill online but the sheer strength of his warmth, wisdom and personality made it seem far closer.
That was a beautiful eulogy, Jason. My deepest sympathy to Larry and to all the MLHH members who met Bill in person. He will be sorely and genuinely missed.
Damon
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RIP Bill. You will be missed!
Picture at our(John and John) place in Michigan about 12 or 13 years ago!
For the first time in a long time, I happened to check in at the MLHH today. I am terribly saddened to learn of Bill's passing, and will always remember him great fondness. Sincerest wishes for peace and healing to Larry and the many other people whose lives were made the better for Bill's remarkable time spent on this side of the veil. Thanks also to Jason, for so eloquently sharing the news with this community.
One Love,
Val
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I am in tears over this and can't even begin to fathom how devastated Larry is. I have likely spent more time with Bill than anyone else here at MLHH. I am really saddened by this and it will take awhile to recover from this.
Scott
Goodbye, my friend. The world has been a better place with you in it.
My heartfelt sympathy to Larry.
Arrangements for Bill
It was a very busy day yesterday, but all of the arrangements for Bill have been completed.
You are all invited to a viewing on Friday evening, May 20, from 6 to 9 pm at Sullivan’s Funeral Home, 2254 Market Street, San Francisco. Please come and say goodbye to Bill.
There will be no funeral service.
Bill will be buried on Saturday, May 21, at 2:30 pm at Woodlawn Memorial Park, 1000 El Camino Real in Colma, CA.
A memorial for Bill, where we can share memories, pictures and stories of our time with him, will be held here at our home at a date and time to be announced later. I will post information when those arrangements have been made.
Thank you for all of the wonderful emails and text messages, and for your posts and pictures on Facebook, here on the Long Hair Hyperboard and on the Hot Boots message board (www.hotboots.com/bol/). The love expressed for Bill has been overwhelming and very much appreciated!
Hugs to all,
Larry
My sincere condolences, Larry. I am on the other coast, but maybe one day I will get to pay my respects at Woodlawn.
Arrangements for Bill
It was a very busy day yesterday, but all of the arrangements for Bill have been completed.
You are all invited to a viewing on Friday evening, May 20, from 6 to 9 pm at Sullivan’s Funeral Home, 2254 Market Street, San Francisco. Please come and say goodbye to Bill.
There will be no funeral service.
Bill will be buried on Saturday, May 21, at 2:30 pm at Woodlawn Memorial Park, 1000 El Camino Real in Colma, CA.
A memorial for Bill, where we can share memories, pictures and stories of our time with him, will be held here at our home at a date and time to be announced later. I will post information when those arrangements have been made.
Thank you for all of the wonderful emails and text messages, and for your posts and pictures on Facebook, here on the Long Hair Hyperboard and on the Hot Boots message board (www.hotboots.com/bol/). The love expressed for Bill has been overwhelming and very much appreciated!
Hugs to all,
Larry
Hey Larry,
I thoroughly enjoyed reading your "About Us" page on your website. I had heard you & Bill talk about many of the events mentioned, of course; but to read about them all on one page, that really helped to clarify your unique history together!
Thanks so much for always welcoming me into your home (and hearts) so frequently throughout the years of having known you & Bill. I've always appreciated your kindness & hospitality! The one thing I will greatly miss now of course will be the long chats I used to have with Bill-- especially whenever we'd get on our favorite topic of long haired men!
It was truly a joy & privilege knowing Bill. Whoever thought that a chance meeting at the Folsom St. Fair in Y2K (3 months after I had foolishly cut my hair short!) would turn into a 15-plus year friendship? Although my heart feels broken today, it is at least a heart made richer and filled with a lot of gratitude for having met and gotten to know Bill Choisser.
Warm Hugs,
Ken
Dear Larry,
I wish to convey my sincerest condolences to you. I cannot even comprehend your sadness with this great loss. I was in tears as I typed my earlier message yesterday. And here I am in tears again as I type this message. I shall miss Bill forever, but sit here smiling through my tears as I look at the photo of you two. May you press on and keep Bill in your heart forever. Unfortunately I cannot attend the memorial service but will keep you and Bill in my thoughts and prayers. Godspeed to you both!
Ted
My deepest condolences to you Larry. It was evident, even to the casual observer, the love and affection you had for each other. I can't begin to imagine your pain.
Bruce
RIP Bill, Sorry For Your Loss Larry
I would like to express my deepest sympathy for you all in your loss.
I never met Bill, only read his occasional postings and saw the wonderful photos of him.
We all have different beliefs - Christian, Jewish, agnostic, atheist and others. Outside the world of belief and religious organisations, there is emerging scientific evidence of the survival of consciousness with an individual's personality and memories intact after bodily death. I think this can bring consolation to us all, whatever our philosophy of life and / or beliefs or lack of them.
Please count on my empathy with you in your mourning and grief, and on my thoughts and prayers.
Anthony
Sorry to hear that. My he R.I.P.
After a couple days digesting what's happened to Bill and then thinking of all the meetups we've had over the years I came across this picture which I feel was an epic mlhh meetup.I fondly remember this day back in 2010 which started with lunch at Duarte's in Pescadero,CA and moved north to the Half Moon Bay area up the coast highway.This group shot was taken of all of us by a photographer I can't quite identify at the moment.I think Ken would know who that was though.To me this is what being a longhair on mlhh meant. Getting to know each other in cyberspace and eventually in real life.I hope others here had the same privilege that I had in meeting some genuine people because of this board.May the memory of Bill Choisser live on forever :)Cheers to all......
Hi Mark,
I believe my brother Bruce took this pic. Bruce and Stuart (our youngest brother) had been out surfing that day, briefly stopping by to say hello and to drop off their surf boards. This meet-up was at my sister-in-law's beach house in Half Moon Bay, where we all drove to after eating lunch at Duarte's.
- Ken
There's also a Half Moon Bay in Stewart Island, New Zealand. No idea there was one in California too.
Larry,
I used to be a regular on this board (from 2001 to 2011), I stopped posting and even lurking regularly because long hair just became normalcy. Today of all days I decided to check out the old MLHH. I ran into this horrible news and before even clicking on Jason's post my stomach dropped to the floor. I am so, so, sorry for your loss. For our loss. Bill was outstanding in more than one way. He was an inspiration and an outstanding human being and a remarkable mind.
Thank you Bill. For everything.
Larry,
I used to be a regular on this board (from 2001 to 2011), I stopped posting and even lurking regularly because long hair just became normalcy. Today of all days I decided to check out the old MLHH. I ran into this horrible news and before even clicking on Jason's post my stomach dropped to the floor. I am so, so, sorry for your loss. For our loss. Bill was outstanding in more than one way. He was an inspiration and an outstanding human being and a remarkable mind.
Thank you Bill. For everything.
Such sad news. My condolences to Larry and all of Bill's friends.
I, as with others, only check in once in while and today I thought I should poke in to see what is happening. I think Bill's spirit must have called on us to come together to remember him here. It was only yesterday that I re-visited the show segment I posted on YouTube, featuring Bill's discussion of face blindness. It was nice way to meet Bill, if not in person, at least through the use of the internet.
Thank you Jason for the beautiful writeup on Bill.
Bruce
Bill Choisser on the M + J show
Bill certainly has been a regular fixture on this board, he will be missed. :-( My condolences to his partner, Larry, and his family.
I think someone else referred to Larry and Bill as partners. They were married at San Francisco City Hall. Bill sent me the pictures. Of course, soon after that California cruelly annulled all gay marriages, but that was later overruled. Larry and Bill were husband and husband, and now, sadly, Larry is a widower.
Jason does in his initial post - 'partner' could refer to a married partner, or a live-in one, and Jason probably intended it as the former, rather than the later. I simply followed his lead as I didn't know Bill's and Larry's preference; some use 'husband' or 'wife', others prefer 'partner'.
With gay marriages now having legal recognition, at least Larry can, as the surviving spouse, handle the affairs of his late husband's estate, and be entitled to any inheritance and/or government benefits that any married couple would have available to them following the death of a spouse. I recall after 9/11 that the surviving spouses of gay victims, had none of those. For many, it was like being victimized twice.
So sad news. I've never known him in real life but he has reached many people, including me. Rest in peace Bill!
I don't even know what to say about this.
I've never met Bill in person but, when I've opened my first topic here telling about my story, he cried because we had some similarities about a terrible childhood and after that, I knew I was in the right place for finding people to trust and give motivation to others. Certanly he's gonna be missed.
I wish I had knew more about him if I didn't arrived at the board too late.
He fought the good fight and now our fellow warrior had it's rest.
Thank you Bill for everything.
Friends and fellow members of MLHH, It was with great sadness that we learned this morning that Bill Choisser passed away last night. Longtime members know Bill well. My first post at MLHH was way back in 1999 but Bill was with this site from its inception. Not only that, but he wrote most of the code for the site’s operations both for the board itself and the behind-the-scenes parts. ... I’d like to pass along my condolences to his partner Larry and the many friends of his who are mourning the loss of this great man. The attached photo is from that day I met Bill in San Francisco. Jason
I'm so very, very saddened to hear this news ... :'(
I was going to say 'saddened' but that word is so inadequate. I was actually shocked and sickened to hear of this from Mark's post on Facebook. I only knew Bill online but the sheer strength of his warmth, wisdom and personality made it seem far closer.
That was a beautiful eulogy, Jason. My deepest sympathy to Larry and to all the MLHH members who met Bill in person. He will be sorely and genuinely missed.
Damon
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Thanks all for sharing your thoughts and memories about Bill. It was nice to read of the various ways that he touched so many of us.
And thank you, Jason, for starting this thread. You did a superb job of summarizing so much of what Bill accomplished here, as well as his fine qualities of character. I believe it's helped all of us to better cope with the loss & grief.
It's cool to know that your earliest contact with Bill was when you first posted on MLHH in 1999. I first met and talked with Bill not online, but in-person, a full year or more later than you (Sept. of Y2K, at San Francisco's annual Folsom St. Fair, 3 months after my stupid impulsive short haircut to be exact). I didn't even own a computer back then! But once I did own a computer, starting in August of 2003, it wasn't long after that when I discovered MLHH, and got to know Bill even better. He was able to articulate the feelings of being a "born longhair" that I had never previously been able to put into words --and yet, intuitively felt was accurate deep down inside me.
"With great love comes great grief", an author on the topic of Grief once wrote (I'm currently forgetting the author's name); but, what an honor to have known him!
- Ken
Hi again Jason,
I forgot to mention that, for me at least, the beauty of listening to a fine piece of music during a period of loss & grief like this, can sometimes comfort and console as nothing else can. I might mess up in my ability to share this YouTube video that I recently came across (I've failed in the past with my ability to correctly upload these things at least - LOL); but if I don't succeed, then just go directly to YouTube and type in the title of the subject line of my post here, and it will take you there...
You might recognize "Gabriel's oboe" -- it was in the 1986 film, THE MISSION, starring Robert De Niro and Jeremy Irons. Ennio Morricone was the conductor of the orchestra who I believe won an Academy award that year. In this video, you get to watch views of the spectacular Iguazu Falls (South America's equivalent to Niagara), as well as other gorgeous scenery on Earth, while listening to this beautiful piece of music. I couldn't help but think of Bill while watching and listening to this... enjoy!!
- Ken
I forgot to mention there are many excellent versions of "Gabriel's Oboe" on YouTube, most of which are quite a bit shorter in duration (but not having the spectacular scenery of looking at the waterfalls while listening to the music). Here are 2 of my favorite shorter versions to listen to... (but I'm not even going to attempt to link or upload this time - LOL....)
* Henrik Chaim Goldschmidt plays "Gabriel's Oboe"
* 2 CELLOS - Gabriel's Oboe (The Mission)
Hi again Jason,I forgot to mention that, for me at least, the beauty of listening to a fine piece of music during a period of loss & grief like this, can sometimes comfort and console as nothing else can. You might recognize "Gabriel's oboe" - it was in the 1986 film, THE MISSION, starring Robert De Niro and Jeremy Irons. Ennio Morricone was the conductor of the orchestra who I believe won an Academy award that year. In this video, you get to watch views of the spectacular Iguazu Falls (South America's equivalent to Niagara), as well as other gorgeous scenery on Earth, while listening to this beautiful piece of music. I couldn't help but think of Bill while watching and listening to this...enjoy!! - Ken
Kenny - absolutely stunning, breath-taking & befitting of Bills memory - thank you !!!
Thank you, Ken, for your kind words about my eulogy. I feel like in many ways I just touched on some of what Bill was about. Please accept my condolences as I know it must be more difficult for people such as yourself who knew him so well in real life. His real life persona was very similar to his online person, though, so it’s not surprising that he touched so many even if he didn’t meet them physically. I’m thankful that circumstances worked out for us all to meet in SF.
I haven’t had a chance to listen to that musical piece yet but hope to do so soon. Thank you for sharing it.
Sorry to hear about the loss of Bill! You could feel his positive vibes, in all his posts.
I never had the opportunity to talk with Bill or meet him , but I sincerely offer my condolences to Larry. He was apparently a very important person to many people in his life, and will be sorely missed. I appreciate all of the time and love that he contributed to making this community a reality. Take care guys.
*sigh*
Our foundation is missing a corner today. :(
What a sad news, Bill has been a great help with his wonderfull insight.
Without him, I don't know if I would have made it to being a longhair.
I wish Larry the very best.