new thread
So it's been roughly 2 years since my last haircut or trim of any kind. My hair is about to my nipples. For the longest time I hadn't seen any split ends at all in my hair. I suspect that was because I don't use heat at all nor chemicals for styling, and I'm fairly gentle with my hair most of the time. Unfortunately though you can't avoid environmental damage. So last week for the first time ever I found a split end, and today I found two more. I'm kind of sad right now because I was doing well for so long but all of a sudden I'm finding split ends. I tried to come up with some potential reasons:
- Sometimes in a hurry I'll comb quickly/rashly and that might cause damage
- General environmental damage from wind/sun
- Not keeping it moist enough; until recently I didn't really use coconut oil, which I regret, I use it regularly nowadays
- Not getting trims? I'm not a fan of trims because I always assumed I don't need them since I don't actively damage my hair with heat, but idk at this point :(
Anyways I'm kinda lost as to what to do. If I'm getting split ends now I don't really know how to deal with them but at the same time I don't want to go back to short hair. Do I just do a search and destroy every night or every week or something?
Any advice is appreciated. Cheers :)
Go to hair stylist and get a nice trim - they may only take off half an inch in the process. If you don't, you may start pulling out hair ;o . The reason: No matter how well you may take care of your hair, time will always do its thing to it. It's nothing you did on your part :) .....
And if you believe that i've got a bridge in Arizona to sell you.
No matter what you tell them the barber/hair stylist will take off a lot more than a half an inch. If you tell them a half inch they'll take off alot more. I've been down that road too often. .
It's like you hire someone to paint your house, you tell them you want he house painted green, they over rule you and paint it orange. You wouldn't tolerate with the house painter, get we tolerate it with barbers/hair stylists.
For barbers/hair stylists it's like their an artist and you (the customer)is their canvas and by golly their going to do what they want not what the customer wants.
So yes at the age of 65 i've been screwed too many times by barbers/hair stylists and i'm darn tired of it. Over the years I only found one stylist I trusted, the shop she worked at closed and now houses an H&R Block. i've never found another barber/hair stylist that I could trust.
They'll cut off a half inch - IF your hair is already all one length, in good condition and (preferably) very straight. If its been a couple years, yeah, they'll chop off a lot more, particularly if its curly. His nipple-length hair might end up shoulder length!
I am sorry you have been screwed over so many times by stylists, but I also think the problem is you do not have a long term or trusted stylist. The key to growing healthy long hair is to build a relationship with a stylist who knows your goals and desires, to ask questions, and be firm about what you want.
Now, if you wait a LOOOONG time between haircuts, cutting of a 1/2 inch is not really feasible if you want a cut that looks uniform and clean. This is especially true if growing out hair for the first time to new lengths... until the entirety of your crown has grown to the desired length, you will have to taper the back to get a uniform length. If the hair on top of your head and the nape of neck grow at the same rate, the hair on the top of the head has to grow that much longer to reach the same length as the nape of the neck.
This is why I think it's important to visit your trusted stylist every 3-4 months or so. Not only will they actively nip split ends in the bud and help keep a uniform length as the top of your head hair gains length, but it also builds a rapport with your stylist. They are working people too who want to build lasting relationships and repeat customers. If the house painter paints your hours orange when you asked for green, they won't do well with repeat business or word of mouth. The same is true with hairstylists.
It takes good, two-way, communication. I also suggest tipping well when you find a good stylist, as they will find time for you. I am quite fortunate myself as I have a stylist I see for cuts, he knows my long hair goals and is supportive. He even allows me to book appointments when the salon is closed so I am the only client in the shop. Funnily, I mentioned the idea of going short(er) and he was quite direct to me, saying: "I can cut your hair short or however you want, but if I do, you will be just like 98% of the all the guys that come through here..." and I knew he was encouraging me to be myself and keep-a-growin.
You don't need to do a full trim if you don't feel like it, the search and destroy method of getting rid of split ends is also an option
Make sure scissors are sharp and cut half an inch to an inch of the single strand where the breakage is at instead of the overall length being trimmed
Buy a pair of sharp scissors that is dedicated to _only_ be used on your hair. I have Fiskars brand, very good quality. You are beyond Search and Destroy, you need to do a micro-trim where you are only snipping the last 1/4 to 1/2 an inch. If you don't feel comfortable doing it yourself, find a friend or family member willing to help you out. Then do regular S&D sessions, to remove any split ends you find. I added a link to a method very popular with do-it-your-selfers with long hair. I have personally used this guide. I haven't used a salon on decades, saved a lot of money too.
Feye's Self-Trim Method
It’s true that you should only use sharp scissors made for trimming hair. Dull scissors will cause more split ends. No matter how well you take care of your hair, eventually you will have split ends. I have my hair trimmed every 6 months by a trusted stylist. I found her by asking another long hair guy with good hair who he went to for trims. Some people trim their own hair, but I don’t see how you can trim it even. Let it grow out for a few months and try to find a good stylist. Women will help you if you ask them. Find a woman with nice hair and politely ask her who she goes to for trims. Get that persons name and number.
Good Luck,
Darrin
