new thread
First off... my operating system took a dive recently and I ended up loosing all my web documents and image files for my Hair Progress page. Plus, my web address has also changed slightly. It was davidfreeman.27south.com. Now it is davytreyn.27south.com. It is currently back under construction though. I did retrieve some of the images from this sites image uploads folder, so I may have enough to redo the progress page. But here's the reason for this post... I am currently in the "two week rule" about cutting my hair. I have been thinking about getting it cut like Brendan Fraziers hair in The Mummy. Below is a pick of his hair. If I do cut it like his, which I probably won't hopefully, I will keep the bangs quiet a bit longer than his in this pic. This is where I need encouragement. TALK ME OUT OF IT GUYS!!!
DONT DO IT!!! Look back and re-read your own post, you are begging us to convince you not to cut it!!! It's very obvious that this is not something you want to go through with and if you do it you will regret it. Just try and focus on other things until this sudden urge to cut goes away or look at as many pics of guys w/longhair as you can to hopefully motivate you.
I AGREE! DON'T DO IT!!! The message is right there in your post, David. You are begging us to talk you out of cutting. It is clearly something you are going to regret. You are already almost through or even beyond the awkward stage with awesome-looking hair (thick, flattering growth pattern, etc.). You have no one but yourself thinking it needs to be cut. Well, it doesn't. Give it a break, not a cut.
Just slash it or don't.
Dude, you are so close to having a real decent length. Why don't you go for a two year rule instead of a two week rule. That is what I am doing...decided not to do a thing until I am through with school.
For me, school does not care, my wife does not care, my job does not care. I am in a more awkward state that you. I wish I were at your stage. I am my own worst enemy when it comes to my hair, but I have put all forms of vanity aside.
Similarly, you are married so you do not need to be neat for the honeys out there. Your job does'nt care so things are cool there. Try to hang tough, bro. I remember that earlier determination...where did it go?
Is that enough encouragement? If not cut, cause in the end it is your hair and you have to live with it or without it. Best of luck, man.
David:
I'm new here. This is my first post, but I have been following along for quite some time. This place is site of encouragment and good advice. I am glad I found it. I have been growing my hair for about 5 months now and yeah, it's a mess, but you are usually the one to say to someone like me to "Keep it long...right or wrong." The picture of you in your old band photo is awesome. I know you wished you had never cut it. Remember the past.
Good luck getting your site back up.
David, here are my thoughts on the matter: I think you looked better with long hair. If you cut it short you'll have wasted ages, and have nothing to show for it. You're so close to having long hair now. JUST DONT DO IT.
Still, if you really are unhappy, then cut it. But you dont have long hair yet. Just awkward stage hair, and nearly everyone hates that awkward hair they get sometime along the way to longness.
Peace.
Paul
I know you probably watched the Mummy and you thought to yourself "Brendan Frasier's hair looks cool". I'm not disagreeing with you. But, really think about it and definitely wait at LEAST 2 weeks. I've read a lot of your posts, and you've always seemed very enthusiastic about growing your hair long. I remember you saying that the last time you were growing it, it was just about getting there and you cut it, and how great & long your hair would be now if you didn't cut it. To use one of your quotes: KEEP IT LONG, RIGHT OR WRONG!
....The only *message* you are getting from that photo might be...
...about 'looks.'
...You are probably have DOUBTS about
..* whether you will look good
with long hair.
..*might you look better with a different style...
...so the way I see it is that it's all about DOUBTS...
Like the others said: Only YoU know what's 'in your head.'
*Try going for longer...and if you still don't like it...
....you can CHOP IT!...
....and IF THAT made you jump...
....all I can say brother is...
....you still have DOUBTS!
...with HairGarden in that I don't like, and move to abolish, the 2-week rule. I don't think 2 weeks is a reasonable amount of time to make a sound decision to weigh cutting hair that has been growing for months versus cutting because of some bad feelings. I think we all owe it to ourselves to give it a bit longer, especially for something that takes so much time to accomplish. Therefore, I submit that from here on the 2-WEEK RULE IS REPLACED WITH A 2-MONTH RULE.
Secondly (and I can't believe I didn't ask you your hair history before! lol), I don't know if you've ever had long hair before (have you?), but if you haven't, at least give yourself the chance to experience your final goal...then see how you feel. You can always instantly achieve a shorter hair style, but it takes time to achieve a longer hair goal.
A little story for you: I'm in a band and we're gearing up for a Halloween party. We're planning on dressing up in costumes for this event, and I decided I would be a Victorian Vampire (the look of one is usually with long hair). So I bought a black long-haired wig. I tried the outfit on yesterday and LOVED the feeling of that long hair! The moral of the story is that you too will probably love that feeling, judging by your past comments.
Thirdly, like others have also stated, you have been the stronghold of many of us here with your positive support and bold words. Just think of those words as if we were saying them to you.
Fourthly, think of all the positive reasons on why you wanted long hair. Did you want to have different options in wearing your hair, the kind of options that ONLY come with having long hair? Would you like the attention? Would you like the feeling of how your hair would fall on your back and face? Would you like the way it looks when you get out of the pool or shower? Would you feel happy finally achieving your goal, as a personal accomplishment? Focusing on the positives will usually stimulate your state of mind in an optimistic direction, allowing you to maintain your motivation.
Just to get a bit more information, what brought the change on? (ie-the awkward stage?). Alright, my friend, I hope to hear from you soon.
We shouldn't have to talk you out of anything, it's your decision. If you are already considering cutting your hair then maybe that is the best thing for you. One of the issues of growing long hair is that many people keep cutting their hair because other people want them to or they think that other people want them to. That's not a strong personal decision but if that makes life easier for them and they are satisfied enough then maybe thats best for them. But it sounds like you really like the style though...maybe even more than long hair. So do it if you want to, it's your life and your decision. Don't grow it because we want you to or to fit in here.
Dude, Treyn found us - we didn’t go looking for him. He has been a keen follower and supporter of this board. I don’t think he's trying to fit in...He fits in. Just because he’s asking for encouragement don’t mean he's weak. I mean, to borrow from the extreme - you don’t tell someone standing on the edge of a building "go ahead and jump, if your doing this you don’t deserve to live anyway!" People loose their way sometimes. Asking for help is something that should be encouraged…not frowned at.
It sounds to me like you have had longhair that so long you forget what its like to be growing it out. You don’t have all the 'longhaired' answers man. You should LISTEN to us still in the awkward stage. You might learn important lessons you've quite obviously forgot.
To be perfectly honest, I think you still have issues with him from past’s posts. Maybe you’re not the right person to be offering him advice..you lack objectivity. Unless of course you dare to sort out your differences?
Mmmmmmmmmmm, but he's not standing on the edge of a building contemplating taking his life now is he? It's just hair, otto. I have not forgotten anything for a moment which is why I carefully worded my post and explained it like it is. I have had both short hair AND long hair so I'm certain that I can speak with more authority on this subject than you. You cannot just have long hair without going through short hair and every step between, it doesn't work that way. Maybe YOU should listen a little more carefully! I am not bringing any past post issues into this...thank you so much for bringing that up, it was a cheap swipe.
If you noticed in you hasty reading of my post, I am actually supporting what Treyn is contemplating if that is what he wants to do (which ever way that is), and he IS serious enough to have presented this to us complete with picture, thoughts and a desire to do it. THIS IS NOT UNCOMMON! I did not say that he was weak, I'm not sure where you got that...maybe you could tell us. Treyn is not "losing his way" just because he wants to change his style or get a haircut. I hope that you come to realize that this board is about people who make their own decisions. Treyn is a big boy and will figure out what is best for himself, but thanks otto for being his bodyguard.
Just out of curiosity, what sort of important hair lessons do you think that I have "quite obviously" forgotten?
After that you can tell me how I lack objectivity when I as a longhair am actually telling someone that it's ok to cut their hair if that is what makes them happy?
And how objectivity means everyone telling/cheerleading a person to do things one way even though he has presented a couple of possibilities. I represent objectivity so far in this thread...don't you think?
...I for one did not read Hair Religion's reply as being unsympathetic...
....maybe the post was read too quickly? After all...
...it did not state: "You DON'T fit in"...
....the post just said:
..."So do it if you want to, it's your life and your decision... ...Don't grow it because we want you to or to fit in here."
No misunderstanding.
You gotta read between the lines man...
Well, OK....just hope Treyn digests all the support we gave!
I did say it was an extreme example (suicide)... But I was trying to highlight clearly that sometimes people can make mistakes of major magnitude due to what people who don’t really care that much have said.
It may be just hair to you..but that’s why we’re both here - right? It’s a million-dollar industry...serious enough I think..just ask anyone in Hollywood :)
I don’t for a second claim to be more of an authority on anything...to claim so would be arrogant in the extreme ;). I know you can’t go from short to long hair in an instant...man do I know. What I was saying is that your hair has been technically ‘long’ for..what?...maybe 8/ 9 years? (I`m estimating of course). That’s a long way from the awkward phase...definitely enough time to forget a thing or two. Its like, say some teenager makes a comment or a suggestion that you, in your many years of maturity ‘know’ is wrong and therefore to be cast aside. But if you just took a moment to think back to how you felt at that age, how people treated you and all the other factors that conditioned your thinking...maybe you would give his/ her suggestion another thought? or at least try to understand where they are coming from.
I regret having to bring up matters of previous posts...the issues of those have surly been delt with. But I think the battle scars remain. I just think that the rhetoric of your post doesn’t seem like one who has the best interests of another in mind. Forgive me if I’m wrong.
If everyone on this board made their own decisions...I think it would be pretty lonely ‘round these parts. If you read Treyns post carefully you would see that he asked us to talk him out of it...that’s what a few of us did. Sure, we’re all big boys... But there is always room for growth.
Bodyguard? naa. I like to think of myself more of a Good Samaritan. Just giving my opinion to what I feel was injustice. I would do the same for you had the tables been turned. But if you always wanna fight your own battles...maybe you should make an official post.
Erm, no, no I don`t think you represent objectivity. Not in this thread. I think you see people who consider cutting as ‘weak’ and are too quick to advise them to cut. At least with what some of us advised, there is a SHORT CUT (pardon the pun) to the original consideration/ decision if need be. For what you seemed to advise...it can appear that there is no way back.
And finally, [Quote: Just out of curiosity, what sort of important hair lessons do you think that I have "quite obviously" forgotten?] – If you have to ask, well...I rest my case.
Peace.
You're way off base, boy. I see your gums flappin' but your not making any sense!
There is no issues between the Tman and me and if there were I'd thank you to say the h&ll out of it. So what if he believes in a god and I don't, it's not an appropriate discussion on this particular board which has always been my position. Sounds like you probably don't think that way.
Using extreme examples is a way for some people to make their point stronger even though it has nothing to do with the subject. That is what you did and that's lame.
Yea, it is just hair unless you are one of those hollywood stars getting paid the millions of dollars you spoke of. For you and me it IS just hair and for the Tman it is just hair too.
Claiming to be an authority on something (or at least moreso than someone else) is not arrogant...if it is the truth. Sorry but that argument is lame too.
AGAIN, I have not forgotten what short hair or "shorter" hair was like and for you to insist that I do is lame again! You don't make a point. I have been understanding of the Tman's thoughts because experience has taught me what goes through people heads as they contemplate growing long hair. It seems to me that you telling him "grow it long right or wrong" doesn't take into consideration that he may just like the shorter style better and therefore it would be better for him to have a style that he was happier with. And if he doesn't then FINE, but there must be a reason that he called attention to his "plight"...don't 'cha think?
Yea, bodyguard may not describe it well enough, it's more like attack dog except that Tman didn't sic you on me (an injustice, ha!). BAD DOG!
I don't think that you actually know what objectivity is. You didn't answer my questions which is what most people do when they make wild accusations that they can't back up. So, let's try this again:
"Just out of curiosity, what sort of important hair lessons do you think that I have "quite obviously" forgotten?
After that you can tell me how I lack objectivity when I as a longhair am actually telling someone that it's ok to cut their hair if
that is what makes them happy?
And how objectivity means everyone telling/cheerleading a person to do things one way even though he has presented a couple
of possibilities."
And where did you get that I imply that there is "no way back"? Hair grows.
As for your smug pat dodge: "If you have to ask, well...I rest my case." You should know that you are displaying about the lamest lack of discussion skills anyone can point to. You have not presented a convincing case, you have avoided the question and you are trying to "end" the discussion by assuming that you are right. That is like saying, "I'm right because I'm right!".
Grow up boy and quit ripping on me just because you got a beef with the world!
Look man, I haven’t got beef with you or anybody else on this board. I still don’t agree with anything you have written and I stick to all what I have said so far on this post.
You have and still lack objectivity on this thread. The delivery of your latest post to me highlighted your emotional involvement in this matter. You can’t be objective if your carrying baggage...and man – looks like your off on vacation.
If anything you have said in your recent post to me is truly how you feel then you need to calm down, take a few breaths and read my post again.
The fact you have grown your hair don’t give you the license to say what you feel and expect it not to be challenged. You don’t have all the ‘longhaired’ answers and you’re not above the laws.
Oh, and for the record: Objectivity – 1.concerned with or expressing the nature of external reality rather than personal feelings or beliefs. 2. Dealing with facts without distortion by personal feelings or prejudices.
I just looked it up. And what do you know. I do know what it means. By that definition – you lack objectivity.
I don’t wish to continue this thread with you. You obviously want a name-calling match and I refuse to be part of that. And your attempt to twist my words by taking them out of context with you latest post is unfair and convinces me that my decision not to continue this discussion with you is the right one. If you can only define victory by ‘who got the last word?’ then dude – go ahead and take it – your welcome to it.
I really don’t need to say this as I am confident that many will see that I never said that many longhairs don’t make their own decisions. But for the record - What I implied by my statement was that if the asking for and receiving of advice was taboo on this board – I think it wouldn’t be the success it is
This isn’t a question – more something for you to think about. [Quote: I hope that you come to realize that this board is about people who make their own decisions]. What gives you the right to define the type of people who visit this board? Who died and made you king? We all have as much right to be here as you do...short hair or long hair.
Finally I wanna say that I guarantee you - I will continue to challenge you on your future statements if I feel they are skewed as I expect you to do on mine. You can count on that.
Peace, otto
>>Look man, I haven’t got beef with you or anybody else on this board.
Sure you do, you got a beef with me. I don't know why but it's pretty clear that you do, a blind man could see that. Treyn understood what I said but you didn't. Maybe it has something to do with your statement: "I still don’t agree with anything you have written". I can only conclude that this statement along with your CONSTANT mention about some earlier "disagreement" or something with the Tman has something to do with your religious stance. Am I right? Do you want to bring all that stuff up again to the horror of others on this board?
>>You have and still lack objectivity on this thread. The delivery of your latest post to me highlighted your emotional involvement
in this matter.
otto, you still don't know what objectivity is! You can't just claim that I acted in ways that I didn't. It's not my personal feelings and beliefs that movated the Tman to post what he did. Look above and see he latest posts where he can clearly see what I was saying. You are off your block and are just making a fool out of yourself. Any emotion has erupted from you for some bizarre reason. Why don't you stop already? If you had actually read my first post like a grownup then you would be foaming at the mouth.
>>I just looked it up. And what do you know. I do know what it means. By that definition – you lack objectivity.
You must be very young because your grasp of logic is very slight. Because you looked it up does not mean that I lack objectivity. You should look it up as your responsibility. My objectivity depends upon what I demonstrated and not what you imagined me doing in some fantasy of yours.
>>I don’t wish to continue this thread with you. You obviously want a name-calling match and I refuse to be part of that. And your
attempt to twist my words by taking them out of context with you latest post is unfair and convinces me that my decision not to
continue this discussion with you is the right one.
And again another one runs away just like they always do when they can't back up what they say. Saying that your arguments are lame is not name calling, it's a fact. Get educated while you are in high school. I will have the last word because I will not just sit here while someone tries to unjustly smear me because he imagines some bizarre conflict that isn't there.
>>I never said that many longhairs don’t make their own
decisions.
It was pretty clear what you said. It may have been stupid but don't try to change it now.
>>What gives you the right to define the type of people who visit this board?
I don't. Who shows up is who is here and it attracts a certain sort of somebody. How do you suppose that I determine who shows up here?
>> I guarantee you - I will continue to challenge you on your future statements.
What does your guarantee include? I haven't paid any money.
keep it long, right or wrong.