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I have dandruff, and get sores on my scalp sometimes. I used Nizoral and it went away but when I started using products on my hair (frizz ease, and maybe it was a coincidence) it started coming back, so I got more Nizoral but this stuff is expensive! I was thinking of using head and shoulders but I heard it damages the hair. I have thick, slightly frizzy hair so I need something that is not too harsh but will control the flakes. If I were to use head and shoulders, should I use both the shampoo & conditioner, or a different conditioner?
To get good dandruff control, vary various dandruff shampoos and/or conditioners. There are several types, tar based (Polytar, Denorex, Tegrin, T/Gel), zinc pyrithion based (Head and Shoulders, Denorex, Head and Shoulders knock-offs), selenium sulfide based (Selsun Blue, Head and Shoulders Intensive Treatment), salicylic acid (Ionil, Sal-Clens), Ketoconazole (fungicide used in Nizoral). Salicylic acid is similar to Aspirin (acetyl salicylic acid), and is also used to treat warts, acne, and myriad other things. I'm not sure how it is supposed to work on dandruff, but it is. My guess is that it attacks the fungus directly.
Note that just because you have flakes does not mean you have dandruff. But if you do have dandruff, varying the regimen prevents the fungi from building up a tolerance for one chemical or the other.
Also, if you have been scratching your scalp, you scalp will automatically grow more cells to replace the damaged ones. You can expect this to continue for some time after you stop scratching -- meaning the flakes can be expected to continue for some time after the fungus is actually gone.
Also, although we are not reptiles, we nevertheless shed our skin, not sloughed in a single piece, but in tiny pieces. This is normal. The idea is to get this to happen in the shower and not at work. Pretty good trick, if you ask me.
I've found that what works for me is to give myself a thorough scalp massage (loosening up the flakes) BEFORE shampooing -- even before my hair is wet. Then, I keep the amount of shampoo and duration of shampoo contact with my scalp to a minimum.
Allergic reactions to shampoo/conditioner products can also manifest as flakes. If this is the case with you, you may want to consult a dermatologist.
You might try Tea tree shampoo. It works for my family and is gentle. My 9 year old daughter even has used it with good results.