new thread
OK, my hair is about 8.5 inches in the longest part. But, tomorrow, it will be half of that length, you ask why, well, because I am 18 and still in a boarding school in England. I kept up with the rules for a year and a half, and finally, the housemaster wrote in my report that if I don't have a haircut, he'll send me to town with the money straight after the winter holiday to have it done. What makes it worse is the fact that my hair is very curly, so I can't hide it away, it is everywhere.
I am not even sure if he'll still make me cut it all off when I see him (even with half the length), and that is why I need some good arguements for long hair on men. My school is very conservative.
Think of it from his perspective, kids in uniform, boys-only school, one of the best in UK, parents looking round seeing this "savage". What can I tell him that might soften him? I am not a hippie, or a junkie or gay, in fact I am one of the best students in the school!
Any ideas?
One advice for people growing their hair: forget about it, just let it grow, love it the way it is at the moment, don't just wait for it to be 2 feet long! Then when it does grow long, you will love it even more.
Thabk you.
Take it from someone who's been in that situation, you're not going to win. I'm sorry to say, but it's true. Boarding/Private schools don't listen to reason or bend rules for anyone. Keep it as long as you can though. You'll be out in what? 5-6 months?
..."I am not a hippie, or a junkie or gay, in fact I am one of the best students in the school!"
Gee, thanks for lumping us all together into one group! At least now I know what social class I should be in!
The vengeful imp inside me hopes he gets pressganged into a buzzcut.
Well, as my understanding there is nothing wrong with being a hippie or gay, that just leaves the "junkie" aspect. BUT, the guy did state that these weren't HIS views, but views of his peers and teachers, etc. He was absolutely right in the statement where he said something to the effect that people always bring out the nagativity in things. yes people, chill. peace.
I remember a while back reading about a school in the UK where skirts were compulsary for all girls attending the school. A large group of the girls complained that during the winter it was far too cold to be forced to wear skirts and also pointed out the fact that during summer the boys were allowed to wear shorts which the girls were not.
Anyway, they ended up refusing to wear skirts and took the whole case to court, where it was stated that allowing the boys a choice of clothing and not allowing the girls impeded on their rights (or some legal technicality like that) and the girls MUST be allowed to wear trousers.
So unless your school forces all the girls to wear their hair short too, you could use the blatant sexism to your advantage.
He said that it's an all-boy school.
Don't think you should put 'hippies' & 'gays' in with 'junkies'!
I mean, some 'hippies' might be 'gay' and...
some 'gays' might be 'hippies' but...
that doesn't mean they all use drugs
Eek, some dodgy implications in that one.
I really don't think you can beat the Schools... you've chosen to be there so you have to play by the rules, and I doubt the housemaster will want to listen to some young upstart.
One of the reasons I went to a college instead of school for my remaining two years was so I could grow my hair - doesn't sound like you're in a position to do that anymore but you could try resisting the pressure for the months you have left...
One word: Jesus.
(George Washington had long hair underneath that stupid wig too, he wore it in a tail. A lot of those weird wig wearers did back then actually)
Interesting this topic should come up, because I actually recall a U.S. court case which we read in Government class that discussed students who sued their school because of hair codes (and I believe won), and one of the justices mentioned his opinion that (paraphrased) "although nobody knows for sure what Jesus Christ looked like, he is almost always portrayed as having hair longer than any of the plaintiffs". :)
What the hell do you mean by GAY you bloody little pompous prick with a silver spoon shoved up your ass?
For that comparison, I hope they force you to shave your head.
Which makes you as petty as the schoolmaster. Come on guys! His choice of comparisons, unfortunately, showed up his biases, and they are hurtful. He's also a kid caught, like most of us at one time, in a no win situation.
Maybe we could handle one problem at a time. Give him some good advice about his hair problem (or remain silent). Then, next week, after the hair problem is over (in whatever way it resolves) post a few lines about his generalizations and prejudices. And since he was apparently speaking out of what he did not know (aka ignorance) offer him some thoughts that he can learn from. Otherwise, you will only contribute to more ignorance.
Robert
Well spoken. I am as guilty as anyone of speaking harshly when gentler words were called for. Your example is one worth emulating, and I will do my best.
To make this post officially on topic, I think we ought to move away from the idea of short hair as punishment. It does no one credit, and only hurts long-haired men by way of association.
Regards,
~S
Well, as my understanding there is nothing wrong with being a hippie or gay, that just leaves the "junkie" aspect. BUT, the guy did state that these weren't HIS views, but views of his peers and teachers, etc. He was absolutely right in the statement where he said something to the effect that people always bring out the nagativity in things. yes people, chill.
Why must everything be so controversial? Yes, throw the fact that he is a "child" into the mix, he's probably smarter than alot of you think you are. He also never INTENDED to label anyone in certain "social classes" or certain "genres" per se. But i'm just showing my displeasure for the fact that people ALWAYS seem to bring out what is unintended and unimportant in life, lol. peace
For the millionth time, 99.9% of gay men do not have long hair.
Why do I have a parody of "Gypsies, Tramps, and Thieves" running through my head?
>I am not a hippie, or a junkie or gay, in fact I am one of the best students in the school!
>Any ideas?
Been There, done that. You have my sympathy. Back in high school
a long time ago in the 60s I was one of the first to have long
hair. It was a constant battle, I got into lots of trouble
for having long hair.
I was not a junkie, I never did drugs of any kind. I was not
gay although some thought I was becaus I wasn't good in
athletics (I never followed the logic there but hey, it was
high school).
I was fortunate that I went to public shool, so I was able to
keep my long hair. By the time I graduated and went to
college it was waist length where it is today. (With alot more
grey).
My advice. Stay in school, strive to get good grades and
maybe your parants will send you to a less strict school.
I forgot to mention that I was one of the original hippies
back in the 60s. (Which complicated matters.....I was opposed to
the Viet Nam war).
First decide if you are serious, there is no point in trying to justify the actions of others that cannot be justified.
(don't play at it)
You will be making a statement, that will be totally misunderstood by 99% of people.
Decide if this matters to you, or if you could not care less how others percieve you.
I use my hair as a kind of idiot test. Most people fail in 30 seconds, I then decide if they are worth the effort of enlightening.
The next thing to do if you think that your right to do what you want with your own body is more important than institutionalised brainwashing is quote this piece of text:
Article 10 – Freedom of expression
1 Everyone has the right to freedom of expression. This right shall include freedom to hold opinions and to
receive and impart information and ideas without interference by public authority and regardless of frontiers.
You live in England, NOBODY and I mean NOBODY can dispute that text it is the European Convention on Human Rights.
If you make an intelligent and informed argument, I cannot see any problems, if the guy doesn't want to be in breach of European law.
If your school is co-ed, are there girls with long hair?
If so, it is sexual discrimination.
Failing that, also tell him you are a Sikh, and if that is also ignored it will be religious discrimination.
Get the idea?
Don't let someone dictate to you.
don't argue- wear your hair as long as allowable- no longer. keep it neat & clean and don't press the issue. continue being an excellent student and you will win their respect. you are not going to change your housemaster's opinion of long hair- arguing with him can only change his opinion of you. you do not need an authority figure actively disliking you. arguments make people defensive... kinda like not picking your words carefully when addressing a room full of strangers. part of me is wise, part of me is a gay hippie who is hooked on herion. that part strongly advises you to get a pre-emptive head sh@ve.
For those who have helped, thank you.
For the other ones, where did I say that you are hippies, gays or junkies???? The only reason that I wrote this is because OTHER people think this about me (or they say so anyway). If you want to discuss hippies, gays and junkies, fine, just open another topic. Chill chill chill, don't see everything in the most negative way!
As for my housemaster, I think that he'll let me have it at half the length, I am out in 5 months anyway...
Indeed, you didn't say that we were hippies, junkies or gays. What you said that offended many of us is that you lumped gays into a negative category with junkies and hippies. Like being gay is bad (or quite frankly, being a hippy is bad?)
First of all, very few gay people have long hair these days.
Second of all, if you want people to have tolerance of you and not judge you because of your hair, then you should learn not to judge other people by their sexual orientation. If you think gay people are in the same category as junkies, then you should take a long look at how it feels to treated as a potential long hair person being compared to a junkie.
However wrong or unfortunate that it is, there are some who are very opposed to the notion of a man with long hair.
The reasons for this are many, maybe they associate long hair only with women or perhaps with sections of society that they are prejudiced against. I think that sometimes (mostly with males) even self denial and jelousy may play a part, along with bigotry and ignorance.
If a stranger has a "problem" with your hair, then this can simply be dismissed by adopting the "could not care less" attitude, as the consequences will be insignificant. It's your life, not theirs, after all!
Of course when someone who has influence over you objects, such as the school master in your case, matters become more difficult. Clearly there is a diologue between you and this teacher, so I would first try to establish the exact reason(s) for his dissapproval. You might drop lucky, and find that a change of style rather than length will be all thats required (my own employer accepts my hair in a ponytail, but not loose at work). If this fails, you could try to argue your case on the basis of sexual discrimination....Yes, I know an all-boy school is involved, and I also realize that these "equality laws" are often paradoxically held as conferring rights to women, but not the same to men. However, you may be able to use them to extend your own argument to the point where you have left the school before any final conclusion (namely,the haircut) has been reached, given that you only have five months to go. Please be aware though, that you will probably need a reference from this man when you go on to a job or university, so tread carefully!!
Wow, people have a short fuse here... I will not argue anymore, there is no point.
For those of you who have helped me, thank you but it is too late, I got a large haircut today, I figured out that is the best thing to do, now my hair is about 3 inches, what the hell.
Thanks anyway, my hair will grow back, I am not in a hurry.
Try the reasonable approach. Go to him. Do not wait to get caught or called in. In fact, call and make an official appointment to see him. This indicates, in his world, that you are serious.
When you meet with him, tell him that you understand how your hair issue must look to him. Then, repeat some of the view that you shared in this post, emphasizing what a good student you are, academically. Then, appeal to reason. Tell him that your hair is important to you AND that the school's reputation is important to you, too. Ask if there would be a hairstyle that you could wear that would not necessitate you cutting your hair. For instance, if you were to put gel or mousse in it after showering and get a "controlled" and neat look, wouldn't that be acceptable. Go with a couple of concrete possibilities that would allow you to avoid cutting. A ponytail would be neater than flyaway hair, but he might not find that acceptable.
I would avoid attempting a philosophical argument with him. No doubt, we could offer you enough material to win an official debate, but it will only come across as trying to usurp his authority and make him more intent on shaving you.
If all of this fails and he is insistent, I would leave, very calmly, but as I approached the door, I would turn around and say: This makes me doubly sad--first because I must cut my hair, but second, and perhaps most importantly, because I thought I had learned from my education here that reasoned and thoughtful compromise was the way gentlemen did business. I guess I learned the wrong lesson. And then, walk out the door.
Robert
You could also consider this. start a collection of photo-copied pictures of British heros, scholars and statesmen who had long hair. stick to ones over 100 years old and write a detailed report on them. If possible try to find alumni of your school to include in the report. Present this to your School master.