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I've recently made the decision to begin growing my hair to at least shoulder length. I've never made it past "the awkward stage before". I've always given in just past chin length. One reason I've done this is that, although I have really "nice" hair, it get sort of dry and frizzy as it grows. Last time I tried long hair I went in for a trim about every month or so. Does anyone have any other ideas on how to keep a neat look to my hair as it grows? This is essential for work and my own self-image.
I can think of three things, Boen. First, make sure you're not washing your hair too often, or in too hot water, or with too harsh a product. You should not be getting dry hair at such a short length if you are taking care of your hair. A mild product two or three times a week, and in lukewarm water, is typically what one needs with longer hair. Remember, you have more hair now to absorb what the scalp creates in the way of oil, so daily washings, which short-haired guys often need to get rid of the oil, are not often needed for guys like us. Our hair not only draws up this oil, but it needs it!
Figuring out which products are "mild" is not easy. Why? Because "harsh" hair care products are as rare as "small" Cokes. Everybody will say all their stuff is "mild", so you have to be just as sneaky as they are when you evaluate their stuff. If it is industrial strength dandruff remover, avoid it, for example, while if it is shampoo formulated for "damaged hair", it is probably a good bet....
Second, no trims! All they do is prolong the awkward phase. With a trim every month it's surprising you got any growth at all. The best way to get through the awkward phase is to bite the bullet and let your hair grow, getting no trims at all. Once your hair grows out, its length provides weight, and weight is what keeps long hair neat. Put another way, trims do not make long hair neat, they make it messier. Avoid them.
Third, you're going to need something to hold your hair in place until you get through the awkward phase. Assuming hats or bandannas won't do in your job, this means hair sprays or other gunk. Your neighborhood el cheapo drug store has all kinds of stuff you can try, and surely something there will work fine on your hair. No need to go to pricey salons or obscure web sites for this stuff.
Boen:
I went through it two years ago. My goal was shoulder length also.
I disagree with Bill. You will end up with a mess if you don't trim it. You are growing your hair so it looks good, right? Or is your goal just to have long hair? If long hair is your only goal, I agree with Bill.
Some of us have jobs that require us look well groomed. I had my hair trimmed every 5 weeks. It was shoulder length in about a year. Trim does not mean taking off .5 inch. It always looked good after a trim.
As far as drying it out, don't stop shampooing! Pay a little more a get moisturizing shampoo from the salon. I assume you have a stylist you've developed a relationship with. Ask the professional for advice. Also, be willing to pay more than $10 for a cut. I pay $19 for a cut in the Midwest. Paying more does not guaranty better service, but good stylists do eventually get higher pay.
Boen, you've got several suggestions you can try, so sample the various products and vary the frequency of application to see what your hair needs without going overboard. Just keep in mind that overdoing can cause damage.
But I'd think long and hard about opting for trims. You've tried that route and it didn't work. Trims may neaten it up a little, true, but they prolong the awkward phase and isn't your frustration with that the last time you tried to grow your hair, what prompted you to write? The way to reduce the awkward phase to its minimum duration is to stop trimming. There is less money to be had from a client who doesn't trim, so your stylist is not likely to tell you that. But the longhairs who post on here regularly who are not hair stylists, all guys who have emerged successfully from the awkward stage, by a large majority will.
Thanks for all the advice, guys. My hair is beginning to pass the point where it can be characterized as "short". That is really exciting for me since it has been almost 3 years since I had long hair! I will use your advice!