new thread
I got the reply to a post as follows by Dan (below). Do you think he`s right?
My opinion:
The length of my hair is my identity. Growing long hair is different from cutting one`s nail because long nails can cause inconvenience. Besides nails is barely noticeable.
But long hair is natural. You decide to grow it in accordance to your will, the same for wanting to grow a beard.
Long hair is NOT JUST PART OF OUR APPEARANCE. Long hair also redefines our relation with society. The society that worships short hair culture and despises long hair culture.
Remember for some of us, long hair causes us discrimations, insults, negative comments. In some ways, it sets us apart from the mass of men who choose to have short hair and be left in peace.
Long haired men are far from similar to any other man with short hair. You can tell what someone does simply by looking at him, although we cannot judge a book by its cover. But most of the time, we are forced to.
Most of the negative things said about long hairs are said by short haired guys.
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Message by Dan:
I have to take offense to this statement. Maybe it fits you, but for me, the length of my hair is not my persona, personality or identity. It's no different from growing long fingernails, a beard or getting a tan for me. It's part of my appearance, nothing more. Maybe I'm not a "longhair"; I HAVE longer hair than the social norm.
Looking for a woman who likes you for you hair is a bit like a woman looking for a man who appreciates her breasts. Sure, physical attraction is important, but I like to think there's SLIGHTLY more to it than that.
Sorry but I agree with Dan. Long hair is just like letting your beard grow or a goatie and nothing more. If some people feel that men should have short hair and think that long hair is satanic, evil or gay good luck to them. I don't care to be honest, because I am sure they do things that I think are weird.
"Everybody is someone else's weirdo"
I don't think there is a war going on between long hairs and short hairs. Just do what you feel is right, try things and don't listen to other people. Then again I have never had negative comments about my hair (even only at 7 inches long) or any confrantations. Do you have any such stories to share? It's a free country believe what you want, but let others be what they want to be. That is what I would say to anyone that has negative comments about how anybody looks. Your rights stop where other people's rights start.
Well for some people its just about appearance, thats why I started growing it after all, but then after seeing how differently the world is through the eyes of someone vunerable to different kinds of treatment it changed me a lot. I think for some people especially the ones who are made an outcast for it get something far more powerful than a hairstyle
What is the same about all men is their diversity. It can not be asked that everyone put the same significance on their hair. A difference of valuation takes nothing away from a person's own beliefs. If someone likes long hair for themselves, men having it on a whim should not be threatening.
An identical long hairstyle on two people can be for completely different reasons. One may feel long hair is an internal need, that long hair mindset where it is part of their identity and how they wish to be perceived by the world. Sometimes it is merely a desire to be different that could be expressed in any number of ways but hair is what they happened to pick. Then there are those with long hair to actually conform but with their peers rather than society at large, perhaps a "We are all being unique together" mindset similar to those thinking they are expressing their individuality by dressing all in black, just like all their friends.
Also there are those compelled to have long hair against their own desires but it is a religious duty for them. For other reasons, some men cut under pressure, some grow more determined by it, some are only trying long hair for a while while others have made a decision for life. I can't imagine a person is changed internally if they cut their long hair off or begin growing from a short style.
There is no right way to be a long haired man. To me, men with long hair are attractive but part of that appeal is that it can be an indicator of being interesting in other, more important ways. Of course, this is not always the case. Long haired men have just as much right to be bland as anybody else does.
To address just one of Tarikh's points directly:
I can't see it that way. As he argues for the existence of long hair people, there are surely dedicated long nail people out there feeling that is a vital part of their own identity. Long nails are accomodated when the value is greater than the hassles, just as in the case for long hair which is by no means inconvenience free. Depending on the length, men deal with hair in their mouth, additional drying time, catching in car doors, jerking the head back when stepping on his hair as he rises, and hair simply being messy sometimes.
Elizabeth
Very good arguments, but
why do short haired men treat long haired men in a different way?
and why dont long haired men "persecute" short haired men?
How, when, where are long haired men "persecuted" by short haired men?
I have never seen this anywhere and I have lived in three different countries on three different continents.
Because there are people that treat other people differently for any reason they are not similar, glasses, race, mental capacity, hair or lack of it, weight, presumed sexual orientation, religion, gender, anything, or even no reason at all. Sometimes a person is sensitive about his hair so treatment thought to be due to the hair may not be the case at all.
Don't they? Just as it is inaccurate to lump all shorties together and think they will always treat a long haired man differently, it would be equally stereotypical to believe long haired men do no wrong. Even here people have mocked the short haircuts of others.
Perhaps it would be easier to speak of particular incidents rather than generalities. Do men with long hair beat people up for having short hair? Not that I have heard of, but that is the way minority violence usually works. It is rarer for the minority to do the picking on of a majority member. The behavior is a function of group interactions and not about hair at all.
Elizabeth, who is wondering why this seems to be a hidden message, like Mike's unlisted response to Tarikh and now Tarikh's response to me
I think there's a generational difference. I'm 45. Very few people react adversely to my hair nowadays, but it wasn't always that way. Besides, I still think there's still job discrimination. I don't think anyone could have walked around with long hair for the last 30 years without being affected by it. For instance, if you have been on the receiving end of discrimination you aren't liable to think of people's prejudices against other types of people as a good thing.
Also, if you are old hippie like me, your hair is your 'freak flag', and cutting it is selling out. I've seen people cut their hair, and it did change the way they were. If you're my age, long hair carries so many other associations, and frankly a fashion statement is low on the list. I don't expect younger people to think this way, or even to grow their hair atall. If they do, I would be surprised if it carried so much intellectual baggage as it does for me. Maybe that's a good thing, as it could mean we're closer to the day when no-one cares if you have long hair or short.
Oh lord, you opened a huge can of worms. I have had long hair and I have had no hair thanks to the army. I have always remained the same goofy person no matter my hair. I love long hair but I won't be afraid to be MR. clean for the final duration of my lifespan once mother nature takes it away. I will remain who I am personality wise no matter my hair length.