new thread
Hi,
I've spent quite a while looking around here before posting, because I didn't want to ask something that had already been covered before, so hopefully there won't be too much annoying stuff here. Although, I've probably missed huge threads where things like this are discussed, so sorry :P.
Having said all that though, lots of the subjects I'm interested in asking questions about /have/ been covered before, but perhaps not in the same way that I would like to find out about them, if that makes sense.
Anyway, firstly, right now I'm not really intending to grow my hair as long as most here, just down to shoulder-length or slightly more really. I also want my fringe (they seem to be called bangs here though, hopefully I've understood what that refers to right :) ) to be around the same length as the back, and to hang down to the side, etc. However, there aren't any "shoulder length" message boards I can find, so hopefully you'll tolerate me :).
So, the questions, in the order I remember them:
1) My hair is /very/ thick, which I've seen people here say is great for growing hair very long, but because I want mine to be (comparitively) short, what can I do about it? Is there some sort of stuff I can put on it to try to thin it out, or would it be a better idea to go to a stylist and ask for those thinning scissors or whatever they are? Because I think it looks better and is more controllable when it hasn't been washed for a day or two, but by then it feels horrible and I have to do something about it. When it's been washed, particularly round the back, it looks huge :).
2) I have been parting my hair in the centre recently to try to coax the bangs into the right place, but at the moment rather than hanging at the sides of my head, they're lurking more around the front. However, if I get rid of the parting, they only reach the bottom of my eyes anyway, so presumably it would be correct to say that as they grow longer they'll start to be more willing to go down the sides?
3) I've heard lots of talk about maintenance cuts, but would I need one if I'm only trying to grow it to shoulder-length-ish anyway? How long does the hair at the back have to be before people start thinking about getting maintenance cuts? Because right now it's probably about 2-3 inches or so above my shoulders (that's a rough guess), but I can't really tell if people who have mentioned getting maintenance cuts got them when their hair was well below their shoulders or not.
Err, there were a couple more questions, but I can't remember them now, so I'll leave it at that. If anyone can reply to this and answer them, I'd be extremely greatful :). And, just to inject a little bit of hope into this message (mindful of the main purpose of this forum), my father used to have very long hair (before he got a job in an office, pah!), so there's certainly been a precedent set in this family, that I may want to continue in the future :).
Thanks, this board has been extremely useful to me already and I haven't even posted anything yet :).
(And of couse sorry for no-doubt asking stuff that you've seen a million times before).
I am in a similar situation as you in that I don't at least presently plan on growing my hair as long as some here. I have had my bangs down to slightly below my chin before so I am somewhat familiar with what you'll encounter.
Firstly, don't use thinning shears! Treyn had a good commentary on this a few threads down and I can't say it any better than him.
I find using a product with a decent hold such as gel can do wonders as far as keeping one's hair in place. Once it sets and you comb or brush it out, I don't think it will flip as bad as when no product is used. I haven't found a way to get my hair to look the way I want it to in the morning but by afternoon it is usually pretty close.
I love styles where the bangs are as long or longer than the back hair. It sounds like this is close to what you are going for.
Hate to answer your questions so quickly. Im in a rush. But here goes:
First: Your hair will lay down better eventually. Yah, you can "train" it now, but its tedious and doesn't work well. Just ignore it till it gets longer. Then do it.
Secondly: Keep your hair healthy NOW so you don't have to get a maintanence cut. The only reason you should cut any off is to get rid of split ends. But since your taking good care of your hair, you won't have any *wink wink*. Yah sure, trimming your hair will even it and make it look "nicer" (for only a few weeks, then your back to square one again anyway) but the goal of growing shoulder length hair (the same goal i have incidently :) ) is to GROW your hair, not cut it back. My suggestion is to grow it a little beyond shoulder length (perhaps an inch past where you actually want it) THEN get it neatened back up to the length you want it at. Voila! Beautiful, even shoulder length hair. Congratualtions!! :)
Thirdly: just leave your hair alone when it comes to "thinning it out". You may think you look bad, but odds are, you look fine. No one said this will be easy, and down the road, you would regret thinning your hair. For more info about that, read one of Treyns recent postings. Learn from others hair growing mishaps.
Fourthly: You can ask any questions related to hair on this board. I think we have all seen the same questions a thousand times over. But someone here is always happy to answer them.
Wah!! Gotta go!
StanleyBey and Jude have basically covered it all, but as everyone knows, I can't help adding my two cents ^_^
The thing that controls "bigness" is most often weight. Seeing as your hair will not be as long as some of the guys here (especially HairReligion...whoa!), you'll need to kind of imitate the effect of weight with product. I like VO5 Conditioning Hairdressing, Frizz-Ease, etc.
I think the general concensus here is that you don't need to get maintenance trims unless you need them (by not taking care of your hair, but I know you will). I tend to agree more with this position now, although my stepmom is a hairdresser and would beg to differ!
Whatever you think is yucky about your hair now will definitely get better with time. It sounds like you don't have far to go to reach your goal. Just take care of it like you would any other delicate thing, and you'll be there in no time. And hey, once you start growing it out, you might not wanna stop! Make your dad proud...it's in your blood to be a longhair!
Loads of luck,
Jenn
1.) Don't thin it out; a while back someone said that when the hair that was cut short by the thinning is growing back, it sticks out and causes a bunch of problems. It would be like waiting for it to grow long again, unless you regularly had the hair thinned. I don't know too much about thinning other than what I read, and it's your choice either way.
2.) I make a line at the top left of my head (when wet) and then part my hair to the right and comb it back; it has that "slicked back" look when wet, but that's how I deal with it. By now it is long enough to stick down to the sides, but I look good with my current style so I prefer it at the moment. Anyways, yes, once it gets longer it will be more at the sides than the front.
3.) As for maintenance cuts, I avoid them like the plague, and advise you to do the same until it's at the length you want, but again, it's your choice.
And as long as you made an effort to look, don't worry about posting a question that might have been posted before. Most people here are cool-headed enough to ignore it anyways.
As for your father, that's awesome. My father hasn't said much to me about my hair, but by mother has been terrible. She often tells me how horrible my long hair will look, how horrible it looks now, and how not to wear it (the the center part or, when it's longer, down; she wants me to *always* wear it in a ponytail when its long enough). Considering the fact that she always used to tell me to be an idividual and not care what anyone else thinks, it makes me mad how she acts about my hair. While she may care about how others will treat me, it is my choice. Unfortunately I think I know what the real reason is, and it makes me disappointed in her. When she made a comment about coming into my room when I'm sleeping and cutting it, you can imagine my anger; besides the comment itself, I am also an adult. My long hair is a volatile subject between us.
Anyways, sorry to get carried away with my stories, and good luck.
Many thanks everyone for the messages, they've all been extremely helpful to me :).
Thankyou!