new thread
Hi, everybody, I'm new here.
When my hair was shorter, I thought it was pretty dang straight. Well, now I KNOW my hair is going to be wavy, because of the problems it's causing.
I think I've seen this problem referred to as "wings" or such. You see, my hair is about even with my eyes in lenght now, and parted near the middle. My entire family wants me to get my hair cut short like I've always had it before, and--of course--I refused to. After I made it clear that I wanted long hair, I recieved all kinds of excuses to cut it short. "It looks dirty!" is one of them, which is just a lie. Even just after showers, when my hair looks cleaner than even hers, my mom will give off comments like "Your hair is just too oily to be long." I'm 18, yes, but I still have to live with my family, and I really don't feel like being insulted over dirty hair every 10 seconds.
So, rather than cutting my hair, I used plenty of strong shampoo to make sure there was no way for her to complain about my hair. Little did I know that, when my hair is that unreasonably dry, it shapes itself into J shapes as big and clear as day. The hair on my right side does the J thing toward my head, which really don't look that bad. On the other left, though, the hair goes beyond J, straight to L! It goes down the side of my head perfectly, until the last inch, which takes a sharp turn outward. That is to say, I have a line of hair sticking out 3/4 an inch on the side of my head under these conditions! Also, all my hair gets floofy, like some kind of evil joke! None of this happened before.
I personally plan on reducing the amount changing the type of shamoo I use to the way I had it before, but just in case I decide to keep appeasing her wishes for super-clean hair, about how long will my hair have to be before these Ls turn into waves? Does this happen to anyone else, and under what conditions?
Thanks in advance,
Jesse
my best advice to you is to grin and bear it, hair with "wings" as you call it turns into great waves when hair gets long. while strait hair may look better in akward phases many strait haired people are wishing for waves/curls when thier hair gets long. but for the first year and a half or so (it depends on how fast your hair grows) your gonna have wings. the bigger the wings, the better the texture it will have when it's long.
Thanks, Reuben! That helps!
But, dang, I wish my family'd get off my back and leave room for my hair (stupid pun intended). The L-wings will make it worse, but, I think I'll be able to take it.
Hehe, floofy...that is a GREAT word ^_^ Welcome to the board!
I never understood it when people would say that someone's hair is "too oily to be long". Let's say, for argument's sake, that your hair is oily (which we know isn't true). The way I figure it, your hair is going to be oily whether it's long or short, so who cares? And as your hair gets longer, only the top of it would be oily because the oil won't be distributed all the way down the shaft. They make shampoo for oily hair anyway, and as a woman, your mother should know that.
Your mom is trying to find an excuse for you to cut your hair. Don't wreck it with harsh shampoo, because that will do more harm than good. These "wings" you speak of are nature's way of defying gravity. As your hair gets longer, it will be heavier and won't do that anymore. Till then, a little gel should help...the general consensus around here is Melting Gel by L'Oreal, but it's not for everyone.
By the way, if your hair was straight when you started, it will probably be straight all the way through. I would be surprised if it turned out to be wavy from straight hair. Of course, once your hair is long enough, you can get waves if you want by braiding it while it's damp and gelled. If not, then enjoy the straightness!
~Jenn
You're 18........Legal Age. You have every right living or not living with your family to dress as you like, take responsibilities for yourself, contribute to expenses, and wear your hair anyway you want. I would tend to want to totally "IGNOR" these "Loved-ones," or as soon as possible move out. Good Luck!
Try cutting back to shampooing only once every 4-7 days, and use a strong "frizz control" type conditioner every time you shower. There are many frizz control and curl defining creams and gels available. I've had the best results with those from the Pantene and Physique lines, which have subsets specifically designed for curly hair. Experiment with your products and frequency of use. It's not easy, but that's why it's called the awkward stage. If you are making a commitment to grow your hair long, be advised that it will likely be pretty awkward for at least 18 if not 24 months with no trims due to your hair type. If you trim it, it will be awkward for a longer period of time. I'm not saying you can't enjoy the awkward stage; you just have to understand that this is a long term commitment, and that your hair is never going to look perfect. Check out the archives because this is the the number one most frequently-asked question here. Lots of good advice and tips to be had.
Good luck,
-DR
Oily hair in my opinion is better than "Dry" hair, especially if your hair is growing in wavy. Sounds to me like we have similiar hair. My hair was kept short for 34 years and was always straight hair until I began to grow it out in August of 2002. I began to get the J's and the L's with my right side always looking better than the left side. Exactly the same thing your going through. My hair, however, is not considered oily. It does get a little oily about 2 to 3 days of not shampooing it. The awkard problem I had was mostly the bangs, maybe a little side hair doing the "L" as well. Today, my hair is looking pretty darn good, if I do say so myself and will be posting a progress pic later today. What will happen is, the longer your hair grows, the "L" will disappear and more "J's" will form, giving you nice wavy long hair that, lately, woman and men have complimented me on. There will always be those that just do not like long hair on men and may continue to give you a hard time about it. I shampoo my hair twice a week and condition it every day. Some days I don't do anything to it and work my hands through it in the morning before deciding if I need to condition it. Because of the natural oils from your scalp will sometimes leave you with great hair in the morning.
I hope this information is helpful.
So much advice in such a short period of time and from so many people! Thanks, everyone! I decided the best thing to do would be to put more time between shampoos, as Dan suggested.
I have never used any sprays or gels (willingly) in my life, but I'll keep Jenn's suggestion in mind if my first idea doesn't work out well.
I, too, didn't realize I had naturally wavy hair until I stopped perming, color, blowdrying, etc., about five years and decided to go all natural. My hair is almost to my waist now and I love it.
My advice to you is not the fight the wave, but enhance it. Wavy hair loves moisture. I wash my hair everyday because it looks oily if I do not. I use Thermasilk Moisturizing shampoo because it is gentle. When choosing your shampoo, look at the ingredients.
Avoid theses ingredients as they are harsh & dry/frizz your hair:
Sodium Lauryl Sulfate
TEA-lauryl Sulfate
Sodium Olefin Sulfate
Alkyl Sodium Sulfate
Choose a shampoo with a mild cleansing agent such as:
Sodium Laureth sulfate
Ammonium Lauryl sulfate
Ammonium Laureth Sulfate
My favorite scrunching gel is "Catwalk Frisky Scrunching Gel" sold at salons. It will define your waves without making them hard and stiff feeling. Great product.
Good luck.