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It pains me to say this, but...
I have been pretty annoyed with the whole mess for a couple of months now, and I feel like I never am happy with the way it looks. If I want to wait for it to hit my shoulders in the front, I'm looking at another year because of the curl, and I just don't think I have that in me.
My hair is just too heavy, too thick, too big, too much maintainance, too much work, too much getting in the way of my lifestyle, and that's the bottom line for me.
So unless something drastically changes within the next two months, my longhair days are over.
-DR
this comes as a surprise. I hadn't got the impression that you were wavering. I'm sure the curls would be less intense with the added weight of longer hair but I understand it would take a great deal of patience to wait for that to happen.
Good that you're doing the 2 week rule. So many months are gone instantly with a cut that it's worth it to not be rash with your decision.
Thickness, IMO, can never be a bad thing... Perhaps you could be a little less careful with drying and maintaining your hair. If it wasn't such a chore, it might be easier to keep.
The issue is not the with the curl, but the weight. My hair is extremely thick and heavy.
All I do is wrap it in a towel to dry for a few minutes and then run some product through. If I do less, it'll just be bigger and frizzier.
"The issue is not the with the curl, but the weight. My hair is extremely thick and heavy."
At least your hair isn't so fine (like mine) that it constantly looks messy and feathery (when I straighten it a little).
There seems to be no happy medium! :(
A few months ago when I had only had my hair growing for 8 months you told me to stick it out.. and I did not regret it.. so I owe it to you to say: "Be patient".
I am the type of person who also feels wih short hair and my lifestyle, short hair might be more practical... but I know if I do not try this now and stick it out for (at least until the ponytail stage for me) I will regret it.
If you set your goal to be shoulder length... wait.. if you will always wonder "what if?" later don't do it... if you feel it's over then do it....
I am at only 13 months and I would feel terrible cutting it after all this... I would imagine more so after 23 months... Stick out the winter period at least ? :)
Whatever you decide I am sure it will be the best.. at least you didn't go shave your head after 10 months growth like a friend of mine here...
i think i know exactly how you feel... i went to play basketball a few hrs ago and my hair would barely fit in the bandana I wore... I had to put it on and off three times to get it right.... it IS a pain but it also has pros - like girls playing with your hair :)
(that is not the main reason though just to keep things straight!)
Since when? I must've missed that memo. :)
I mean with long hair in general...
From where I am from, every male has to go to the army for 26 months after they finish high school. So after that many let their hair grow... it is mostly a reaction. A lot of ppl I know tht grew it out cut it and a lot of them regreted it, for others it was jsut a passing phase and for one it has become second nature. I had tried to let my hair grow before but because of the "afroness" I had to cut it after 2-3 months... Last year I said if I don't do it now I never will and I decided that once I get to the ponytail stage I will decide what to do, leave it or cut it. This is where you are now... so... make your decision carefully
It depends on you my friend... You must decide what you prefer, but weigh the costs and benefits... It took a while to grow out to a pony tail length... you don't want to go through all that again if you still "have it in you"...
Whatever you decide... It will be the best for you.. Read the first exerpt from the link below... If that passion has gone and you are over it - go for it.
Can I just say here: EMBRACE THE AFRO!
I recently saw a family with two kids. Mom was white with bright red hair, and dad was black. The kids, who looked to be about 8 and 12, bother had huge red 'fros, and I thought it was the coolest thing ever!
Hey man, I know its your hair, BUT...
Your hair is such an inspiration to all of us with curly/wavy hair! It looks awesome!!! i know it takes a lot of time just to get it looking manageable, BUT, imho, i think the extra time would be worth it! I'll be where you are in about a year, year and a half. I always want to cut my hair but I look at your hair and think," hey, Dan's hair looks damn good, and if i keep abstaining from cutting, mine will someday look as good!" I realize its your hair dude, but atleast you're doing the two-week thang...thats all we can demand of you! If all else fails, PLEASE stay on the board! Later Dude, JB
You look great with either short or long hair.
All that matters is if the decision makes you happy.
- Brian
...Dan. You should do whatever makes you happy. Here's my 2 cents...
I don't know if you've ever had long hair or how old you are, but I would say that if you've never had long hair before to try to stick it out as long and hard as you can. Here's the reason why: you'll never truly know what you would have looked like with the hair length you desire. Plus, since it's fair to say that you obviously had a desire to have long hair shown by your trying to grow it out recently, you'll probably always wonder how it would be to have long hair. That being so, you'll probably try growing it again, possibly years later. But, you'll still have to go through the wonderful awkward stage. If you've never had long hair, I'd try as hard as possible to stick it out since you're half way there. It's quite possible that in a year, your thick curly hair is much easier to handle & you will love the "new you". This I know from experience.
If you've already had long hair, then you already know what it's like, so having a lower threshold in cutting won't make as much of a difference.
Whatever you decide, best of luck to you.
This is the major reason I haven't cut it yet. But speculation seems like a shaky defense for unhappiness!
...I guess I don't know just how unhappy you are. Only you'd know that. Good luck...
Dan,
I know that curly hair can be a pain. But let me make two points from what I know about you....
1) I've always enjoyed the way you present your photo history as a transformation. You have pictures of yourself from two years ago in which you have short frosted hair, are overweight, etc. As your pics progess, you continue to grow the hair, get in great shape, and have a much more confident smile. I know that hair is only a small portion of the overall transformation, but it definately has symbolism to it.
2) You've always seemed very interested in hair. I remember you telling us about giving a talk in school about the influence of hair. I can guarantee that you will miss your hair. When I cut 7 inches off last time, I was regreting it after day 1. Don't do it unless you KNOW that you won't regret it in any way.
Good Luck
It's interesting you say that, because I was thinking along those lines the other day. I was thinking in the direction of "I don't really need all this hair now that my face has gotten skinnier and I don't need to try to draw attention away from my body."
Interesting perspective. I've never seen someone who was very overweight whose hair, of any length, drew attention away from their weight.
I find that I take my stuff with me wherever I go, and that most distractions don't work. I appreciate you sharing your struggle with us. Growing out my own hair, and reading the stories of others here has helped me see that it's never really about the hair.
Robert
Well bud, it's your decision but I warn ye...if you cut your locks off, then I'm getting that undercut! You're lucky that you can tie yours back dude, as that's all I really want to be able to do! I mean, as Mike said, you're an inspiration to us curly-hairs...
Still, whatever you do, it's up to you and if you'll be happy with shorter hair, go for it!
Well I'd never thought I'd see this from Dan...but...I can understand. I do have one suggestion though, as a last shot. If you get through the two weeks and still feel like cutting it off, then why not get it permanently straightened (bioionic, or maybe a less expensive type) and go with that for a week or so, just for a change? Who knows? you might like it. Then again you might not.
Your hair, your choice, but I just want to let you know that you're an inspiration to us shorter-haired folk.
Good luck with whatever you choose
Thanks, but I have interest in straight hair whatsoever. I know what I look like with straight hair from when it dries tied back.
As a cutly hair too, I know how much effort you must have put into growing your hair. So cutting it would surly give ME a heartattack. But if it makes you unhappy, and don't feel longhair is important to you at this time in your life, then I don't blame you for wanting to cut it. Though it would be cool to see your future progress on this board, I understand your reasons for wanting to cut. If you did cut it (heaven forbid) then it would be cool to post your new pics here and your thoughts on the whole deal. Anyway, hope you continue your longhair journey! If not though, I hope you feel happy with your new head of hair.
Having curly hair increases the length of the awkward stage considerably. But before you do something extreme take a good look at Tarikh. He has hair that is long and curly and it looks awesome. In a few years your hair will probably look similar to his, if you stick it out. Long hair is a long term commitment. As your hair gets longer gravity will play an increasing role in making your hair more manageable and it won't stick out to to sides so much. When it gets really long it should hang nearly straight down and your bad hair days will be only a fading memory. Absalom
I'd think that when you pull your hair back and wear it in a ponytail that not only do you look like you're short haired, but it then seems like managing such a hairstyle would be easier and less big, heavy and thick on your head & around your face.
I've been wearing it in a tail every day for about 2 months now judt to get it out of my face. But what's the point of growing it out just to tie it back?
Dan,
I've had mine long for three years now. I wear it to work, most days, pulled back. It is neater that way for longer periods, and working as a teacher from 7:30 until 4:30 every day, I just don't have time to take care of it like it would need if it were loose. When I get home, though, it comes down, and all weekend, too. Some days, i do wear it down to work.
But, to your question, why have long hair . . . because it gives me these options. If it is short, you have no options. There are other reasons too, like, because when it's all said and done, I like it long, and it's difficult to explain why. Just do.
I do go through days when I know short would be easier. I still keep it long.
Robert
You'll never have to see a barber again? Seriously, if nothing else having a tail will save you money! If it gets too long, snip some off the bottom of the tail.
I dunno, man. I'm getting pissed off waiting for the tie-back stage. Are you telling me that the novelty soon wears off? Oh, and can I have a link to your progress piccies please? I've tried looking through the old posts but can't find it...
> Oh, and can I have a link to your progress piccies please? I've tried looking through the old posts but can't find it...
A high % of guys I've seen over the years who've had long hair often wore it tied in the back. You do raise an interesting point, however, which makes me wonder if your preferred hair style (of long but free flowing) is different than many other guys.
Do many guys who always wear their hair in a ponytail really like the look and feel of short hair, but just keep it long because it saves on having to go to the barbershop? I really wonder about the guys who bind up their hair with LOTS of rubber bands, almost as though they're worried the pony tail---meaning their hair---will get loose.
I keep 8 to 10 cloth bands on my hair because if I did not it would mat and tangle so severely that my pony tail would not have grown to 38 inches long. I would have been lucky to get it to grow to 20 inches if I wore it loose. I am a cyclist and the wind is a real problem. I live in a very windy place as well, the San Francisco bay area. I have a mix of straight, wavy, curly, coarse, medium, and fine hair. Wearing it loose works best only if all your hair is nearly straight, then it does not tangle. Binding up my hair with multiple bands works very well for me and the result is that I have perhaps the second longest hair of all the men who post messages on this board. Absalom
Dan,
Whatever choice you make, good luck with it man!
Thanks to all for your thoughtful and encouraging comments. I'm having a pretty good hair day today. This two week thing might be healthier than I thought!
i dont know how many times ive pointed those with questions about growing curly hair to your pictures, becuase they look so good
Try the thinning that has been mentioned here before. Perhaps with it thinned out a bit it will be easier to manage?
Of course the thinning will probably make getting your hair into a pony a real challenge.