new thread
I find myself questioning the differences between men's long hair styles and women's long hair styles more and more. Karsten's comment about the half pony tail look says it all. What do you guys think are the boundaries for guys styles--assuming that he is straight? I'd like to hear women's opinion on this one too.
I think the lines of distinction are becoming less and less defined, and styles are becoming more free-range. Seriously, the only hairstyles on men that I've seen and think are feminine looking are some of Jarkko's, and that's primarily due to his somewhat delicate features. Bill, it'd be hard to make you or someone like victor look feminine in ANY hairstyle with those beards of yours!
I'm the "other" Bill--that's why I added the second B. Sorry about the confusion.
I've checked out Jarkko's pics and that is one of the reasons that I made this post. While I'm not big on some of the styles--I like long hair to show--I don't think that they made him look too feminine. It's my guess that many of them and lots of other styles that today are considered "too feminine" will be adopted by guys in the near future. A lot will have to do with what women think.
all the sexual preference remarks and hair?
There is absolutely NO real differentiation between "gay" hairstyles and "Straight" hairstyles. If this were true, most people would believe long hair is exclusively a female preference, thus making a man with long hair GAY.
I would expect long haired men to be more tolerant and smart about sexual preferences....but it comes up on this board more often than it should.
all the sexual preference remarks and hair?
There is absolutely NO real differentiation between "gay" hairstyles and "Straight" hairstyles. If this were true, most people would believe long hair is exclusively a female preference, thus making a man with long hair GAY.
I would expect long haired men to be more tolerant and smart about sexual preferences....but it comes up on this board more often than it should.
"If this were true, most people would believe long hair is exclusively a female preference, thus making a man with long hair GAY."
Actually, at least from the comments that I've read, it is just the opposite. It is the straight guys that like long hair...
This issue aside. The reason that I mentioned straight is because that is what I am.
Why is it important we know that?
Also: it is true that it is mostly straight men who have long hair, but what is one of the first derogatory thing that is said a long haired guy (especially by older generations in narrow minded, small town America): HE LOOKS LIKE A WOMAN.
"Why is it important we know that?"
Why is it that you want to try and silence the views of 90% of the population?
"HE LOOKS LIKE A WOMAN."
I could think of something far worse that they could say...
So could any seventh grader. Thank you for being a gentleman.
Its funny - I've griped about this before, though I've examined the phenomenen of Comments like: "Long hair is Gay" or "That hair style is Gay."
Mostly I think it comes down to the fact that there are some people who don't know how to deal with their own feelings on a subject or the subject makes them unconfortable so they label it "Gay".
Or whenever they see a guy doing something stereotypically female they lable it Gay - they don't do this out of homophobia they do it because to say it was Girly wouldn't compute. (I like watching my girlfriend brushing her long hair - wait a sec I'm watching a guy brush HIS long hair - um er... he-must-be-Gay.)
In this example the Guy probably has just completely shocked himself by inwardly acknowledging he was looking at another man in the same way he does his girlfriend, that opens a whole can of worms emotionally and breeds negativity towards the longhair.
My Point is that hairstyles are not Straight, Gay or feminine, they are just hairstyles. Its the emotions that are generated in some less intelligent people because they can only clearly identify gender by strong stereotypes and without them they can become emotionally confused or threatend. Hence the labels that emerge.
(Does that make sense?)
I like feminine hairstyles on men too, and in former times from the back I was mistaken sometimes for a woman, especially in the darkness. It even made me a little bit proud that my hair must have looked beautiful, and why should this attribute be negative.
And men with long hair that I like, it attracts me like beauty does it, I would like to compliment it but this is difficult in this culture. I am sorry that interest in long hair is often related to sexual interest. The same happens if I would like to compliment a womans long hair, it can be so nice to talk about it, but if it is related to sexual interest I even have to fear that she calls the police.
wolfgang
My opinon: there are NO bounderies! Simple as that. SOCIETY has "made these up"............and the "average" person that isn't their own person follows in hopes to be accepted by what they hear or are told by "non-thinking........non-original........insecure people." Alas, the "Clone Person" will NEVER please society no matter what. The person worries and worries about what others "think." Just pitiful and pathetic to be caught in such a bind.
Do I detect a bit of the revolutionary here? Come to think of it, the Founding Fathers were all long hairs too...
And.............what of the Native American Indians? Sissys? Hardly. Feminine acting.........I rather doubt it. This "short-hair" trend is really quite recent when considering many thousands of years of the Human Race. Men are SUPPOSE to have Long Hair.........period! At least Mother Naure says so. As for wearing your hair in different styles as Resonance has been trying.........this is just fun! (It can also look absolutely stunning on either a Man or Woman.) So, what's the big deal? Ah.......sometimes I wonder about the mentality of most of the "Sheep" of todays society and their "invented" hang-ups. And for the "Straight" comment: does this cross the minds of people when Women wear a shorter hairstyle? People love to point fingers..........that is, people that are unfortunately extremely insecure and "afraid" to be their own person.
"And for the "Straight" comment: does this cross the minds of people when Women wear a shorter hairstyle?"
In some cases it does.
See "baldie the eagle's" comments above
My opinon: there are NO bounderies! Simple as that. SOCIETY has "made these up"............and the "average" person that isn't their own person follows in hopes to be accepted by what they hear or are told by "non-thinking........non-original........insecure people."
Justin, my friend, you've echoed exactly what I had in mind to say.
I'd have to agree that the boundaries are wholly non-existent; it's only the overbearing force of "the norm" that gives them any substance.
I've worn beads, fish plaits, French braids and "Legolas" hair out in public and have never had any problems. Once I deliberately went to a very trendy pub (where I'm usually the only longhair in the massive place) with a very feminine hairstyle out of curiosity. I ended up having a trouble-free and enjoyable night out.
I hope you had people watching the reactions for a bit of fun though. It was quite comical to see a couple seated behind one of my friends at a recent long hair get together. Dave was wearing a high partial ponytail that was braided for maybe a foot or two then banded off and the rest of that tail and the hair underneath were left loose. Great style for keeping hair out of the way when eating with fingers only- yummy Ethopian food, but still showing off his glorious extreme length.
Back to the couple, the woman was quietly arguing with her partner that yes, that is a man as her guy looked on dumbfounded still wondering if that really is a guy and why a guy would ever want to look like like that. Wish I had seen his face as we left and all the guys at my table turned out to have long hair, just not as long. More everyday sort of lengths such as tailbone and mid back. :-)
Elizabeth
I'd just like to take this time to say that I'll wear my hair however the hell I want whenever I damn well please. If I wear my hair a particular way it's probobly because I think it looks good. I don't sit in my room in front of a mirror pondering what I'll do if some stranger thinks I look too feminine for his tastes.
It's people with attitudes like yours that broke the back of the taboo against guys being able to wear long hair but there comes a time when that tactic can work against you. I think that the first battle is won and it is time to move on to the second.
Now that "Society" permits guys to wear long hair let's push the envelope a little further and wear it any way that we please--I have only one caveathere... Do not attempt this little palace coupe without consulting the queen and her coterie or it will be the end of this little revolution before anybody here realizes it. Guys like long hair but they like women even more...
Love the language of this post! :-) This Empress would be thrilled if her Prince Charming wore her hair toys. I never get to see them in use when on me. A lot of products do try to make toned down color versions of things to sell toward the underutilized long male hair market. I am not shy about saying I bought "guy" hairsticks for me to wear, not that it elicits any sort of similar response to a guy wearing supposedly regular hairsticks.
Elizabeth
It's people with attitudes like yours that broke the back of the taboo against guys being able to wear long hair but there comes a time when that tactic can work against you. I think that the first battle is won and it is time to move on to the second.
Now that "Society" permits guys to wear long hair let's push the envelope a little further and wear it any way that we please--I have only one caveat here... Do not attempt this little palace coupe without consulting the queen and her coterie or it will be the end of this little revolution before anybody here realizes it. Guys like long hair but they like women even more...
Since when did anyone need "Society"s permission to do whatever they want, fashion-wise? And who gave "Society" that degree of authority?
If anyone thinks they need anyone else's "permission" or "affirmation" to grow their hair out, they've got more deep-seated issues to contend with, first.
I think Bill B is asking what long hairstyles are nowadays considered sufficiently masculine for the casual observer not to think that the wearer is intending to look feminine.
I think he could have expressed the question a little more carefully, but despite the (I am sure inintended) sexual preference slant, it is a fair and reasonable question to ask.
100 years ago, everything was divided strictly into 'male and 'female' worlds. Nowadays we are more enlightened, and people are more able than ever to be themselves. The differences between the genders have narrowed massively, and many women have shorter hair than many men. The situation is changing all the time - in the 1970s, although there were lots of men with longer hair than average, male ponytails were very rare indeed, and braids even rarer. Nowadays, both are commonplace, and neither regarded even by bigots as 'unsuitable for ("real")men'.
More adventurous styles - I would say it depends on the wearer: some people will look right with a style that would not suit someone else, some men would look 'masculine' with almost any hairstyle, others would not. At the end of the day, do what is right for you.
You hit it right on the head. Thanks
Boundaries only exist as long as people don't step over them. When someone makes the first step, there's normally an inital kick-back but sooner or later more follow and it becomes acceptable and the boundary gets pushed back a little further.
Its also a very individual thing and its about what you are confortable with - I'm confortable with the half-tail but many other people on this board aren't. If you set your own boundaries then fine, just make sure they are yours and not societies.
When I first wore my hair in a half-tail I got a compliment from a 40ish woman at work. She said "I really like your hair like that - it looks so cool."
This was in front of a co-worker who was razzin me about my hair.
Bottom line is that I find the style comfortable and it doesn't matter if others like it or not - but it makes me feel great when they day they do!
I love it when that happens. I was in a bar one night with a bunch of guys--all with short hair. Out of nowhere this really good looking girl starts making comments about how much she likes my hair. It made my night... and ruined theirs.
It made my night... and ruined theirs.
he he...with all the (good natured) fun that is made by my short haired friends about my hair...it is fun to see their expressions when something like that happens.
I only wear mine in a half tail when I can be bothered... but most people who have seen it really like it, and I've heard dissapointed comments when I don't. Just today another friend of mine, (former model) asked me why I wasn't wearing my "Beckham Pony Tail" and she seemed genuinely dissapointed that it was missing.
I'm gonna become a great advocate of that style - its great to hear about how much people miss it!
I think hair is not gender specific, and it can be nice and beautiful for women and men too, depending what people think about beauty.
So I accept every hair style that allows the hair to go back in it's undamaged long flowing state, that's my restriction, although I like dreadlocks from sightings too, but I want my hair to be composed of free single hairs.
I am limited because I don't know how to braid it, how to create hair styles different from ponytails.
And I don't know if I would make experiences with hairstyles that would not be accepted by the colleagues, I am already happy that I have no problems with very long hair in an almost short haired environment.
I don't know why there should be a difference between straight and gay hairstyles.
wolfgang
A different aspect of this is not so much what styles might be inappropriate for men, so much as how far a guy is supposed to go in spending time on his long hair and using styling techniques typically reserved for women. Examples might be a guy taking a very long time styling his hair, such as with a blow dryer, to get every hair in place, or setting his hair in rollers, or putting in curls in with a curling iron, or a very difficult braid or updo. In this case, the style may or may not appear feminine, but the guy is willing to go as far as women do to get attractive looking hair. Kind of the metrosexual approach to long hair (which usually can benefit from a lot more styling than short hair). I think this is an issue for some people. What are opinions about this aspect of it?
For my part, I think guys with long hair should consider all styles open to them. "Too feminine" is definitely in the eye of the behold. If it's a style you like, go for it, and do what it takes or you're willing to do to get it and maintain it.
I have never thought of using a blow dryer as feminine. As a matter of fact my hair definitely looks better if I do that, but it damages hair, so I would only blow dry for a special occasion. I guess I do think of curlers, etc as feminine though.
I use a blow dryer all the time too and never thought that it was too feminine>
I've done all but an updo. That is, before last Wednesday. Now, got three options: 1) loose and parted in the middle or on the side; 2) up high with a little bit of hair sticking out of the tie; 3) pulled straight back with almost nothing sticking out. Not good. Hoping I can stave off any more visits to the stylist for at least a year. All depends on how soon I'm employed and on my own, I guess.
-J
Would anybody object if I quoted them on a long hair website that I have been working on?
Fine with me
-J (who finally is able to make a small half-pony - things are improving)
The issue of permission politely goes the other way. "I may use something unless somebody says no" is not the best way to go about this, especially when the notification given is buried off another response and without a title making the subject clear. Ethically, only those people that give permission would be quoted.
Not to assume anything, but if my words are among those you seek to replicate, I would have you know my express permission is contingent on viewing your site as a whole including a pre-publication reading of the quotation page. This being an openly viewable board it is up to people to use the words here, and the same is true of images, as you see fit with the understanding that the decision will impact the way they are perceived. As a nod to the webmasters it might be kindest to provide direct links to messages (insuring context accuracy) for those you wish to share on your site once they have been archived here in a longer lasting link.
Elizabeth
Actually I didn't intend to quote anybody that didn't expressly state that I may do so. I'm still in the process of reworking the site so it will be a while before it is done. If you would like to check out the original site, the URL is:
http://www.geocities.com/bill2003x/
I have had that site and your board saved for a while now. :-)
Love your photos, I have always liked the Sun King though he was a long hair by adoption, always wigs is my understanding. I do have to admire a man of any age pleased to show off features he was so proud of, in this case his shapely legs and red heels.
Elizabeth
"I have always liked the Sun King though he was a long hair by adoption."
That's the first time that I've heard that said about him. It's also an issue that I never even considered. I guess that I will take that one down. Somehow it doesn't seem right though... kind of like taking the cane away from a blind man. What do you think?
Bill
Bill,
Long hair is the appearance to me, effort is not a factor. I don't believe people have to somehow "earn" their style to be counted. (I see extensions that way too. If somebody wants to try long hair for a time I encourage them.) Louis XIV chose to wear long hair and that is what your site celebrates. I am betting Newton was a wig wearer as well. Keep him too is my vote.
Elizabeth