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I have been fighting frizz since my hair started to get somewhat long.
I want to have my hair out, but five minutes outside, or even a short while inside, the top layers are all curly, frizzy and I look rediculous. Unless it's dark outside, and the frizz isn't that visible ;) I end up putting it in a tail within half an hour or so. And the times I don't, I come home a few hours later and almost go crazy when watching myself in the mirror, wondering why noone has commented on my hair looking all stupid.
Sometimes I can get most of the frizz under control, by using straightening irons, and putting tons of gunk in the hair. Never removes it all, but at least the "curls" won't appear (my hair is not straight, but it isn't curly either (perhaps 75% straight ;), but the top layers usually get really weird, especially when the air is damp).
Anyhow, to get to the reason of my post... ;) The times I do somewhat manage to get most of the frizz out, large parts of the hair still end up sticking out making me look rediculous again. Most of this can be "fixed" with a comb. But that would mean I have to recomb everytime I put my feet outside the door, or walking a little faster inhouse.
How often do you guys usually have to recomb? And am I just worrying too much about how the hair looks? I always compare my hair with people I see. And it always amazes me how they seem to be able to keep it so neet, even when it's really windy. Do everyone simply recomb all the time? ;)
ok, stupid post, but anyway...
What will reduce the frizz is getting more length. Length = weight. Weight will keep down the frizz.
Trimming fights length. Combing can also fight length if you do too much of it and damage your hair. So can chemicals, straightening, and high-heat drying. Thus you should avoid overdoing these things which appear to make your hair neater for now but fight the ultimate goal of having it neat simply because it is heavy.
I used to comb frequently, back when I was growing it out. I combed to the point I caused damage even. I had to restrain myself. :-) Now that my hair is long, I don't even carry a comb a lot of the time. I seldom need it, because long hair that is curly like mine is best made neat with the hands.
One adjustment factor one must make is accepting that long hair is not a solid unchanging mass like short hair is. Learn to accept that your hair will be moving around a bit. That is one of the beauties of long hair.
Another thought that will help is to realize that messy hair is generally taken by others as okay when you are outside. Messy hair is frowned upon though when you are inside. Just comb, or whatever you do to neaten things up, when you first come indoors. There is no wind indoors so your hair should only need infrequent attention while you are inside. And there's little sense in combing when you are outside. Applying this line of thinking will cut way back on combings.
Thank you for your answer.
My hair is probably about 8 cm belove the shoulders. Not yet enough for gravity to pull the ends straight (they are somewhat "bent" upwards). At approximately what length will the hair get long enough for gravity and weight to do it's job?
I am embarassed to wear the hair down all the time, getting too much frizz and fly-aways as it is. Decreasing combing will only make it worse, what's the point of having long hair, if you can't wear it the way you like?
I can't imagine myself with short hair again, so cutting it is a BIG no-no. But still I can't have it looking anyway it wants. Still hoping it will get better with more length, but have been hoping that for over a year, and no big change.
I mostly let my hair dry on it's own. But considering that a lot of women (and men) blowdry their hair every day, use lots and lots of gunk etc, and their hair usually look a lot better than most men's hair. I say that we are probably over-anxious about the effects heat, chemicals etc have (even though I sure worry everytime I use a blowdryer, even though it really doesn't do much to the hair).
I don't mind the hair moving, falling in my face (even though that sure can be annoying at times). I accept all these points based on the hair being "alive". What I do NOT accept, is looking like a hedgehog!
As mentioned in my post, even indoors my hair becomes all messed up after just a short while. Air does cause the hair to move (of course, and nothing wrong with it). But when the hair moves, it also causes the frizz to reappear, and other hair-parts sticking out. Of course not as bad as being outside, but bad enough.
I am not sure though if perhaps I just want thing to bee too "perfect". but I have a hard time beleiving that other people do not notice, and think it looks messed up (as you mentioned, it is not as "acceptable" indoors.
Could you post a photo of your hair the way it naturally is, without straigtening it or gunking it down? Just wash it, comb it, and take the photo as soon as it has dried. My gut reaction is you're trying to have straight sleek hair when what you naturally have is more wild and curly.
Yeah, well hair mostly looks like it wants. You can neaten it within limits, but if you get too rough with that, it will cease to look natural. If you naturally have curly hair, you will never have natural looking straight hair.
(laughing) - I do hope that some of the hedgehog look isn't because you've damaged your hair from paying it too much attention.
Sounds like you may be expecting too much of the hair type you have. Some guys with "straight hair like you want" complain that it is limp and moan about not having enough body. I guess we all want what we don't have. :-)
If you have curly hair, other people will notice it doesn't look the same as straight hair. :-) But in time you can come to feel that curly hair is okay. You mostly have the length that you need to provide gravity for making your hair neat up top. More length might make it slightly neater down at the level of your jaw. I guess what I'm saying is your hair is long enough now that you are probably seeing something pretty close to what it is finally going to look like.
The pics at the bottom are right after a showever, dried and brushed. No gunk or even a blowdryer. The hair is actually really frizzy on those pics, but somehow most of it seem to get "invisible" on the photo. You can still see some of it though. Should also be noted that 5 minutes outside and it will be 500% worse... ;)
Well I don't have curly hair, it's more straight than curly, but not straight either. There is a name for it, but I only know it in Swedish... However the frizzy top layers, sometimes can get quite "curly", especially if damp weither, which is weird...
I very rarely have breakage, I don't even think I've ever seen a strand that does not have a white bulb on it. As for general damage, I don't think so...
With the difference that I began growing my hair out because I wanted it long and straight. If I'd knew my hair wasn't as naturally straight as I'd thought, I would probably not have growed it out.
Of course, this was two years ago, and my view on hair has changed since then. Now it is a part of me, regardless, even though I still would prefere it fully straight and think that it is worth some sacrifice to get it.
I am not expecting miracles, but I would think the least to expect is being able to minimize the frizz to what I see on other people...
Thanks for your reply though
I don't think any of us get the long hair we thought we'd get. :-) Our hair when short just doesn't tell the story. In my case, I expected thick black curls, not fine brown and blond waves and spirals! But now I'm used to those spirals and I wouldn't trade 'em for anything. They're a part of me. They're mine!
Hello Patrik,
Although you know when your hair does not look like you wish it did, it will be less noticable to others. We often hold ourselves to standards we do not expect in others. You might want to ask somebody next time if your hair does look mussed or not to them.
Or put another way in a half remembered paraphrased quote I have seen attributed to television personality Dr. Phil: you would not care what people thought of you if you knew how rarely they did.
As one who has recently gone out on two occasions thinking my hair was too far overdue for a wash but decided I did not care and ended up getting a hair *complement* of all things on both those days, there is a good deal of truth in the statement above.
Elizabeth, currently looking like a tufted owl with those above ear hairs refusing to stay tucked in
That is true, but when my hair looks a LOT worse than most of the other longhairs in the surrounding at any time, I would think that people would notice, especially if indoors. Of course, it is possible that I think it looks worse than other people do, while they might think it is just a little more messed up, I might think it is a huge difference. Though even if I know that this might be the case, it sure doesn't feel like it.
I can't just ask someone if they think my hair looks good, even if I do know them, they would think I am nuts ;)
hehe, people are crazy ;)
I doubt your hair looks worse than mine, ;)
Thank you for your reply.
Well I have a simple remedy - works for me, I don't know how it'll do on you but it's worth a shot. Shampoo every 2nd or 3rd day and rinse/condition every day -or- spray in some leave-in-conditioner after your shower. If I shampoo, then condition, and then just let it dry, my frizzies are everywhere. But after a few days they lay down nicely because of the scalp oil. You can speed this along with leave-in-conditioner, although too much can make your hair greasy and cause you to have to wash it more often.
hope this helps.
Tried them all, makes no difference what so ever. It does get less frizzy after about 2 days, but that is only because the hair gets too oily, and that only means it looks thin, dull and greasy instead.
Thank you for your reply though.