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The other night (Wednesday) I went out with a crowd of mates for a night on the town, we went to a few bars and clubs, and I remember feeling really uncomfortable.
We were in this one bar/club, which was about as 'upmarket' as Tenerife gets. Its a pretty cool haunt popular with a young crowd. I remember thinking... "All the guys here have neatly groomed short hair, I'm the only one with wild longer hair." I must admit I felt really out of place.
They were also running Jackass the Movie on the TV screens, seeing the "sneak-up with clippers" scene kinda unsettled me too...
Does anyone else get like this when in "Short Hair" Environments?
I think I need to find some new places to hang out.
Although trends are to much longer hair in the UK there is still a resistance to hair of a proper length - ie shoulders or more. It is simply a case of finding somehwere else where they are not so narrow minded or a greater range of people gather.
Don't be too concened the best places are welcoming of all.
CXould there be anything in the fact that some Brits still have short haircuts to go on holdiay? or weer you somewhere that the Thompson crowd would not go?
Presumably 'no biker' included bikers with short hair!
Yes, it did. Most of the old 'Box Hill Flyers' had short hair, although long hair was certainly well accepted.
One thing riding a motorcycle has in common with long hair is that it lets you experience discrimination from the receiving end. Where it differs is that you can walk in the same place without the leather jacket and crash helmet and be treated entirely differently. It also differs in venue. Anti-biker discrimination tends to manifest itself in bars, whereas anti-long hair is more of a problem in the workplace. I think that those who practice discrimination always have a lot in common with eachother, though.
Can't say I've ever felt uncomfortable with it, I've gotten used to being somewhat of an oddity where I live, but if I encounter a place with a lot of long hairs, tatoos, piercings, and other non-typical looks, I definately feel more at home.
Hey Sorted! Cool pic btw in your other post :-)
Anyway yeah, I had THE strangest encounter in a short hair environment yesterday! I was in a local pub playing pool with some friends, and I just nipped to the toilet. On the way in to the toilet a guy with a shaved head GRABBED my hair! and flicked it a bit!!!! I was like "what the.." and he butted in with w.t.* is that on your head... you should shave your hair like me!" Before I could answer he pulled down his pants a little to expose a shaved pubic region (eugh I didnt wanna see!) , shouted "FAGGOTS" and ran out!!!!! Me and my friend who was also going the loo coudnt stop laughing for ages! (luckily we saw the funny side of it)
I was pretty freaked out!
~Gaz
Wow - That certainly qualifies as the Strangest encounter I've ever heard off...
A similiar think happened to me last time I was in the UK, but nowhere near as weird. A guy stopped me at the bar and asked me if I was Gay, I told him I wasn't. He then waved his finger at me knowingly and said, "I know what it is, your on drugs aren't you?"
It took me a moment o figure out what had motivated this little exchange, then it dawned on me, he was on about my hair... LongHair meant I was either Gay or a Junkie... but hey at least I wasn't a pissed bloke sat at the bar making rude comments to strangers...
<<<< Before I could answer he pulled down his pants a little to expose a shaved pubic region (eugh I didnt wanna see!) , shouted "FAGGOTS" and ran out!!!!!
A guy stopped me at the bar and asked me if I was Gay, I told him I wasn't. He then waved his finger at me knowingly and said, "I know what it is, your on drugs aren't you?" >>>>
If I didn't know better, I'd think you all were making these encounters up. But, then again, it dawns on me that there are a lot of head cases or flat-out jerks out there in the world.
I think such extreme reactions or comments say a lot more about the source of such comments than the person they're being directed at.
I've felt uncomfertable in similar environments too.
When I'm down at my local town with my friends, we go into clubs and bars, and eerywhere you look everyone has the same spiked hairstyle! It's like they're all clones of each other!
I start then most of the time to feel a little depressed, I feel this short, spiked hair environment isn't for me!
I see some of my short haired friends really enjoying themselves and I'm just down partly because I wish my hair was longer, so it wouldn't look so bad, and because sometimes I feel I don't really know some of them at all, the way they act. I've asked some cool friends of mine would they mind coming to face off (long hair haunt) but they're like no way, like the place is too weird. They just don't understand what fun it can be headbanging to some awesome metal bands! Yea, I think I need new friends too lol!
I only ever feel uncomfortable when going into the town (and encountering townies, and god only knows there's ALOT of them here in Hemel Hempstead). Other than that, not really.
You live there? I was planning to go there this wednesday, but we got delayed and had to skip it to get to the airport. Fun fun.
because I am wondering what they are wondering about me!
I think that the 'alternative' scene has virtually ended its flirtation with head shaving, as has the world of mens' fashion (apart from the recent Beckham anomaly).
So the shaved head is retreating to the heartlands of fashion-lag: - boy racers in sleepy rural market towns and overweight 30-year-old England football fans. When these groups rediscover hair, there'll just be a we'll be left with a residue of died-in-the-wool skinheads, elements within the gay community and those genuine baldies who've given up on hair altogether.
cheers, Barry
a trendy shavedhead might actually use up thoughts of you but a true shavedhead could care less about thinking of others and their hairstyles. I have lived with no hair and I have had super long hair. Both styles worked for me. I didn't worry about anyone else's hairstyle than mine.
Right now I'm studying for the Bar exam and I'm the ONLY long-haired student in the lecture hall for our Bar review class, and the hall holds about 300 people! So, I understand. Although, at times it feels good to be the only one! :)
hey fitmus, where are you from?
i'm going into third year of undergrad, and i'm considering applying to law school in a couple years, although i might have other stuff in mind to do first, like going to japan. Anyway, i'm wondering what your mindset is as a long-hair about to become a lawyer (since i might be in the same situation too years down the road)-are you planning on cutting it, or is that just not necessary?
I'm in CA. I am not planning on cutting at all (I'd wear a wig first!). I first came to this board two years ago in search for support and advise because I was considering regrowing my hair long, but I was concerned because of entering a "professional" career. However, someone, two years ago, said something to me that I will never forget, and that is it's how you carry yourself that matters. If you have it pulled back in a pony tail so it's neatly groomed and you carry yourself professionally, things should be fine. I haven't gotten a job yet because I'm studying for the bar, so I can't speak of the interviewing process with long hair. I'll keep you posted in a couple of months, though. The important thing is to be happy, and if growing your hair long makes you happy then you should do it. We all have one life to live and, as men, we have a greater chance than women to lose out on having long hair our entire lives. Go for it.
Hey thanks for the advice (I hope you scroll down this far on the board still!). I'm from CA too, but that would be Canada in my case. My brother-in-law, who's a lawyer, and a fairly conservative guy in the sense that he's not really a fan of long hair, said that someone with long hair in the law profession could probably still make a good go of it, but would have to be twice as good as was otherwise the case. I think that him saying TWICE as good is definitely an exagerration, stemming from his mild dislike of long hair, but if having long hair did push someone to do even better in life, then that's another benefit as far as I'm concerned. Talk to you again in the future, best of luck with your plans
And thanks for best wishes! Best of luck to you as well.
It's called "peer pressure". In this case, you're feeling a psychological need to look like everyone else so you can feel more comfortable in those environments.
Personally, I've never felt that way, but that's because I'm completely non-comformist. I couldn't care less about how anyone else looks, and I couldn't care less about how they think I look.
One important thing to keep in mind when growing long hair is that it's one of the most prominant methods of self-expression possible. If you're a man and have long hair, you're going to stand out in a crowd, especially one full of short-haired men - no if's and's or but's. It's that simple.
Before we got cell phones, my wife used to have me paged at whatever store I was running errands at. If they asked what I looked like, all she had to tell them was to look for a man wearing all black with waist-length hair.
At certain places, I get the feeling that every guy there is reading stuff like GQ magazine, or whatever other men's fashion-type magazine is commonly read, and following it to the LETTER, worrying about all the trends. not at all just because of their short hair, but the whole package.
and i'm glad i'm NOT a part of that scene. lame!
HI Sorted
Guess I am lucky as I have never felt this way but can well understand why you did...............I wouldn't have liked it either.
Yes! Isn't it too bad that there are not more Long Hairs around who could "hang-out" and have a good time and feel comfortable.
If only all the guys on this Hyperboard lived in the same town. What a BLAST that would be! :-)
Justin~
ps: Your hair looks so sensational. Most likely the other short hairs may have (in a few cases) been a bit jealous? Who knows. But we ALL KNOW Short Hair is so common. Trouble is, so often it makes everyone look almost the same. With Long Hair the opposite holds true. Quite unique.
I can imagine situations where I'd feel uncomfortable about having long hair.
But yesterday I was at an annual outdoor event. It struck me how few shaved heads or buzzcuts there were, and plenty of men with long or longish hair. 5 years ago there would have been loads of shaved heads and very few longhairs. Things are going our way, lads!!!
Cheers Barry
Men with short hair might feel jealous. Why? Because they are not in a position to grow their own hair, or feel uncomfortable about it, or they might be balding. Alternatively they might actually hate long hair on other men, and not be jealous at all. I think it's safe to say that a man with a shaved head or very short hair isn't jealous of long hair because he could always have a longer 'short' style if he wanted to.
But my experience is that women seem attracted to long hair on men. That does it for me! Maybe that's what some non-longhairs are jealous of - if they're jealous at all, that is!
Has anyone else noticed how many long-haired men seem to be paired up with very beautiful women?
Cheers, Barry
I guess Nyghtfall is probably, right, I was most likely feeling a subconcious pressure to conform.
The Club was pretty "yuppie" where everyone seems to be trying to do the same things to look part of the clique. I was also aware of that whilst I was there, and I think the realisation that this place appeared to be for a "certain type" of person, left me feeling a little left out.
I used to go to a few Indie Gigs in small venues when I lived in Portsmouth, I was always happiest in places like that... there was never any pressure to look a particular way or do any particular thing. Altogether much more enlightened places.
Must admit, watching Jackass and random head shaving unsettled me a lot too. The first time I saw that scene I was paranoid someone would creep up behind me with a pair of clippers. (I rationalised over it for a while realising I'd never seen a pair of electric clippers that didn't need to be plugged into a wall socket and figured I was quite safe sat out on the terrace.)
Sorted
I've never seen the movie. Just out of curiosity, how long is the guy's hair that gets chopped?
I have actually had a bit of an antithetical feeling to yours, mate, in the strangest of places.
Most of your are familiar with Paintball, no doubt. I play a similar game called Airsoft, which uses air rifles that are replicas of real-world weapons. Consequently, it draws a conservatiive military-oriented crowd.
I don't think I need to explain that I'm the only one with long hair there. : )
It's kind of nice, though. With so many people that already look alike, and then put on camoflauge fatigues that make them look even more similar, I am readily identifiable by my ponytail. No one ever shouts "hey you!" at me. : )
I find it strange because you'd think that in a conservative, military-oriented crowd a longhair might feel a bit persecuted.
The only thing I notice when I'm the only longhair in a particular situation is that I'm the only one who is distinctive - the only one who isn't a clone.
I agree also with the post below about being changed by growing my hair. I am a lot more confident knowing that I am myself.
Don't know if that makes any difference to you, but hope it helps a little.
