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i am asking me why I like to wear my hair long. Since I was a teenager I feel this need. Some men like long hair, some not at all.
Maybe there is a psychologist in this forum who can give explanations ?.
The dumbass answer to this is "Why Not?" But that doesn't go anyway to explain the motivation, particularly given that a lot of us describe a "gut feeling" or "need" to have long hair.
I'm no pyschologist so I can't pretend to know the answer to this, I can only analyse my own motivations. I too felt a need to have long hair from a very early age, my facination with long hair started when I was 6 years old. One night (i must have been 6 or 7) I remember thinking to myself that when I grew up I was gonna have long hair, this feeling didn't go away, all the way through school, university & beyond. It took me until I was 24 years old to actually start doing anything about this and 18 months later I finally feel like I fulfilled a life-long ambition. And I'm much happier for doing it.
The question: Why? Still isn't 100% answered, but I think it has something to do with "self-image". I doubt this is a technical term so let me explain what I mean by it:
We have a perception of ourselves, which can be different to reality and can be different to other people's perceptions which often are the basis of reality. Example: If you rate your looks out of 10 most people will say 7 or 8 (modesty holds people back from saying 9 or 10 and self confidence and pride holds people back from saying 4 or 5.) Where as if you put this question to others you'll get much greater range in response.
This perception of ourselves or "self-image" can be warped by modesty, insecurity, self confidence and a host of other emotions. You build your self-image by what you admire and what you want for yourself, and most people will try and sculpt their self-image towards their desires, some with greater sucess than others, but most people will believe they have acheived their desired self-image regardless of their actual sucess.
Unless...
a) They have depressive tendancies or are insecure about themselves in which case they critically question their acheivements often in a more accurate way than people who exude confidence and positive thinking (if we didn't believe we were beautiful we'd all be depressed.)
b) Their self-image is a long way from reality and the differnce is clear.
This was what motivated me to grow my hair, because my self-image suggested to me I should have long hair. I can't really explain why I developed this particular sense of self-image only to say that I always though people with longhair were more attractive than short hair, but the self-image theory explains the motivation and the gut instinct to have long hair, it also explains my happiness with long hair.
(Hope that made sense long post my appologies.)
Sorted
Sorted is so right.
I was lucky to be able to have long hair when I was 18 (back in the 1960s) and apart from one period since have stuck with it.
It is ME. I have the confidence to carry it off and people around me expect that.
Strangely my parents even came to the view and whilst in the 60s in a conservative (large and small c) household they were against but supportive they positively begged me not to change before their respective deaths.they saw as me, tehir only son and wanted let me keep that.
Now occupying a senior position I would no more change as anything. Anyone starting work for me is given the choice within dress codes etc shaved, long or any where in between - as long as they are comfortable.
Just tidy and clean is all I ask.
IANAPsychologist, but I'll tell you what I think anyway. :)
I think it's different for everybody. There are some "common classes" of longhairs I think:
1. The rocker -- longhaired because he wants to identify with the rock-n-roll culture. More generally, there are guys who are longhaired because they desire to identify with some particlar culture.
2. The rebel -- wants to separate self from society at large because he regards it as lacking in some quality.
3. The born longhair -- raised that way! Grew up on a commune, had hippie parents etc.
4. The religious longhair -- is a Sikh, Native American, or member of some other religious sect with a preference for long hair. Also applies to spiritual people apart from any organized religion, who feel "called" to grow their hair.
5. The sexual -- indulges his "feminine side". Not necessarily LGBT, although that fits in this category. Possibly interested in the concept of "androgeny", or it may be a fetish.
6. The pure aesthete/artist -- passionate types who regard longhair as part of an aesthetic ideal.
7. The power player -- longhair makes a statement about having achieved a professional status where they are no longer subject to the same rules as everybody else.
If you look hard at yourself, you can probably see some elements of at least one or more of these categories. Is there anything I left out?
I see myself in 3 maybe 4 of those catagories. Interesting theory, maybe that's not an exhaustive list but its well thought and will cover 99% of cases.
Perhaps you should be a pyschologist.
The only other class I thought of is the "Beachbum" - Guys that live on the streets who have no money, inclination or personal motivation to care about their appearnce.
This is not intended to be derrogatory nor to apply to everyone who is homeless, you could be homeless and be a longhair for one of the other reasons listed. The "Beachbum" will take a haircut if its offered to them, so its clear that in this case the longhair is circumstancial rather than the result of any underlying motivation..
These people seem to exist in my neighbourhood, alchoholism and drug addiction plays a strong part in this class of longhair and they are clearly distinct from the others you have identified.
No offence to our user called "BeachBum" I don't think this defintion applies to you. You handle just happens to match the name we have to describe these people in my neighbourhood.
Yep. That's plainly another category. I might lump it in with "mentally ill/down and out". I see these guys sometimes on the streets of DC, and you can tell because their whole appearance is unkempt. They are definitely not worried about tangles, conditioner, or whether or not to get a trim. They are more likely worried about where they are going to sleep that night, what they are going to eat, and what government agency is tracking their movements. One time I saw one of these guys puke his guts out right there on the downtown mall next to the Smithsonian.
As awful as this is, it's probably no worse than what we used to do with mentally ill people: lock them up in institutions that were like Abu Ghraib.
Born longhairs as described in that FAQ most usually have yearned to have long hair all their lives from early childhood. This is the case DESPITE the non-existence of any social reasons such as those listed below.
Bill
I think the "born longhair" is a small part of all of us, seeing how our scalps are intended to produce long hair. Long hair is the natural process, it is short hair that is unnatural.
Most people work hard their entire lives to ignore the urge to grow their hair long, but still the feeling lingers.
When you feel the need for something that you cannot allow yourself to accept, problems arise. I think this is what has happened when long hair gets a bad reaction totally out of proportion to the reality of the situation.
I see most of the reasons given about as being only small factors in themselves, but factors that allowed men to get in touch with their biological nature.
What about:
8. Haircut phobia -- Person has so many disasterous haircuts in his lifetime that he is afraid to have anymore.
I'm not a psychologist, but I have studied people in an amateur way all my life.
I think we have a persona - an image of ourselves which we feel to a greater or lesser extent we need to emulate. I have always felt that I wanted long hair - most of those on this board obviously have the same feeling, and clearly you do too. Other people have other feelings - in extreme cases, there are those who feel that do not want their left leg, and will not rest until it is removed. Makes the concept of wanting long hair seem fairly ordinary in comparison.
Morpheus in "The Matrix" explains it like this: "Is it so hard to believe, you're clothes are different, the holes in your arms and neck are gone. . . .your hair has changed. Your appearance now is what we call 'residual self-image', it is the mental projection of your digital self".A character in the first matrix named "Apoc" has hair akin to RedLeader's in the real world, and a slicked back ponytail while in the Matrix.
In not a psychiatrist, but in your case I think it's part of your core personality traits that can't be changed--the hair can be changed but the "need" to have long hair remains.
Personality is what makes individuals unique. Some people "need" to keep their apartment clean, others let it get messy. Some people "need" to socialize with a lot of people, others like to read books. Some people "need" to have long hair and some people "need" to have short hair.
Personality may be inherited, but most of it is probably developed when the brain grows between the age of 6 months and 4 years, and more developes during during adolescence.
There are a lot of interesting answers aren't there? I think perhaps I was originally in the 'rocker' category. I also think Sorted's theory is very good. I definitely have a self image moulded by people that I admired and wanted to be like, mostly rock musicians. They were the idols of my day. And then I think after a while long hair has a momentum of it's own. I like having long hair, and can't help thinking it would be even nicer if it were longer!
