new thread
Hi folks, I am new to this site and have been reading some of the posts and have really enjoyed them. I am 45, happily married with 3 kids. My 15 year old son has long hair past his shoulders and he struggles with prejudice both in the village we live in and at school, but I support him in not getting his hair cut. Anyway, I keep my hair very short, but told my son this past summer that I was considering letting my hair grow out. When I graduated high school my hair sat about 3 inches past my shoulders and I have always wondered what it would like to grow it long again. I have tried a couple of times but never got past that "ackward" stage. I am having trouble deciding whether I should "let it go" mainly because I am an Anglican priest and I wondering what the potential fallout amongst my parish members might be. What do y'all think about a pastor with long hair? I'd like to grow it at least 6 inches past my shoulders.
...Pastor Dave. I think that many of us, at least myself, take something for granted...life. We only have one life to live. If there is something you want to do, and it won't hurt anyone, I say go for it. I think it's a shame that men need to worry about what others may think because of having long hair. Granted, sometimes the worry is more justified, say to losing a job where the money is necessary to survival. I personally see nothing wrong with a long-haired pastor. Personally, if I was in your shoes, I wouldn't care what anyone thought since there is more to a person than just hair. Hair simply shows individual character. I have long hair to please myself, not others, but that's just me.
When I first came to this board over two years ago, I was entering lawschool. I posted a message of my concern that I wanted, like you, to regrow my hair but was concerned at what my co-workers would think. One post hit me hard and I remember it to this day. It said to not worry about you hair; as long as it's pulled back professionally, it comes down to "how you carry yourself". If you carry yourself well, your hair shouldn't matter...assuming it looks neat.
You've only got one life to live, don't live it in fear, at least with growing your hair out. If growing it out would make you happy, go for it. As far as techniques for the awkward stage, stay tuned to this board if and when you decide to regrow. There are many answers to that, the most important being patience.
I say go for it. I have known of pastors with hair to their waist. Growing your hair long can help your spiritual growth as well. Growing your hair long will show to others by example that you are a man with great patience. It should take about 2 years to reach the length you desire. The length you seek is ideal and is easier to maintain than short hair or very long hair. I am at the other end of the scale and have hair almost to my knees (click on my photo) and it is quite difficult to maintain. Absalom
The good news is that you are an Anglican which tends to be much more liberal toward things like this as compared to another post on the board where the doctrine is a bit more restrictive. Another good reason to go for it would be the support to your 15 year old son. Opening the minds of those of those who have prejudices against long hair and all the other prejudices that stifle ones's acceptance as a child of God, would be an extension of your ministry.
Here's an idea:
Put a picture of Jesus, with all his glorious long hair, somewhere near the pulpit. So if there are people in the congregation who look at you preaching and start to judge based on your hair, they will then see a picture of the man they're there to worship, with long hair. Perhaps that will make them think twice about preconceived notions?
Anyway, just a thought. Best of luck.
I am a former clegyman. I am 44 (45 in two months) with three children, so we are in the same age boat. First, I think a priest with long hair is a non issue. If you want long hair, grow long hair. I also think that as a priest you are up against some of the strongest energy to be found on the earth when it comes to living your own life. So, be prepared.
I think this no little issue. If growing your hair is part of who you are, then you should do that. Will your church allow you to be who you are? Do you dare? What will your own children (and you) learn if you do this--or if you don't do this?
BTW, what country are you in, since Anglicans are everywhere?
The possibility of what you are doing is powerful.
I would love to hear how you navigate this.
Robert
Thanks Robert, nice to have brothers in the same boat! Thank you to all who have replied as well. I feel very encouraged by y'all and feel I have the support I need to continue on this journey to being a long-hair. BTW Robert, I live in New Brunswick, Canada. Thanks again, and I will let you know how things go.
Congratulations on your decision to grow your hair long. I think the experience will be illuminating at the very least and you could discover that you really are a 'longhair'. I see no conflict between being a Christian male and having long hair but in your position as a pastor you will no doubt be confronted with the apostle Paul's views on Christian hair in l Corinthians 11.14-15:
"Does not nature itself teach you that for a man to wear long hair is degrading to him, but if a woman has long hair, it is her pride?" (from a borrowed 'Revised Standard Version')
Heavy stuff and it is not surprising that some Christians view this as a proscription against male long hair. Perhaps Anglican teaching already has an answer to this question.
One thing about growing your hair, you could find out that 6 inches past your shoulders is just the *beginning*! The best advice I can give you is take regular progress pictures! They really help to show growth and can be very encouraging. Good luck.
Thanks for the advice. It has been argued that what Paul meant was that men should not adorn thier hair (as the Greeks were fond of doing in those days) but wear it "au natural". That way there would not be the charge of trying to look feminine.
Certainly the Anglicans seem to be one of the most liberal denominations. We used to attend Anglican services where the vicar had his ears pierced and wore earrings. One Christmas one of the lady parishioners bought him earrings that looked like Christmas tree baubles, and he wore them in church. If he could get away with that, then I'm sure you ought to be able to grow your hair to your shoulders.
there is a catholic priest in Boston who also started wearing earrings with no problem
Welcome to the board!
I think you should grow it if that's what you want. I personally don't think it should matter if a priest has long hair or not. It's the internal things that matter.
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Splat
As a fellow christian, I say go for it.
Pastor,
Go for it. You will look good with hair 6" past your shoulders.
As for your congregation, you might risk losing some, but I feel it might be very few and if they are true christians and beleivers in your leadership, they will accept it. It looks like they are not accepting your sons long hair though. In my opinion, without meaning to offend anyone, I think if those people in your village are prejudice against your son and dont treat him well and hopefully they dont treat you that same way, well, they are not worthy worshippers and are not sincere good people and are superficial.
Jesus Christ had longhair, if they met Jesus back in his time, would they be prejudice towards him, they wouldnt if they say they are true christian followers.
I, myself am Catholic, born and raised and I have really long hair and I have read about some Christians thinking long hair on men is a sin. Thats ridiculous, especially when they claim Jesus really actually had short hair instead of long hair. I guess they were there to see it, huh? Again, not meaning to offend anyone, well maybe except for them, that is the most stupidest, thing I have ever heard them say.
So go for it Pastor, and as for the awkward stage, they last different time periods, some longer than others, hopefully yours wont last long and its something you have to endure, but the end result...nice goodlooking longhair is worth it. Don't you think?
Good luck and hope to hear longhair updates of you growing your hair.
Eddie WLV
Pastor Dave,
I am a Catholic priest and having been growing my hairfor a couple of years. However, I'm not the pastor of a parish, but am teaching at present. I do serve at parishes on weekends, and I've had some negative comments from some congregation members, but nothing I've considered serious enough to cut my hair. My feeling is, some may ob ject, but we have to serve all. I admit if it became a major issue that crippled my service, I'd cut it. This is the longest I've worn it, but I've always kept it somewhat longish and have never had a problem.
I'm aware of 1 Corinthians 11:14, mentioned in another post. Some exegetes do say it was not long hair as such but wearing it is a feminie way. This makes sense, since St. Paul is arguing about different roles for men and women in prophecy. Reading it over and over again, I don't see how he is giving a command, I think he is making an observation about what is natural, which even he admits is disputable (v. 16). Ironically, his argument is about women wearing veils, which has virtually fallen out of use in Western countries. Also, isn;t it interesting that tradition almost also depicts Jesus with long hair?
Thanks for your reply and your observations. Most helpful.
